With A Little Help From My Friends
by Ronja-R
Summary: Future fic set post-s4. Blair has a secret to protect and rallies the NJBC to help her out.
1. Chapter 1

I wasn't planning on posting this until I had finished BM3 but I couldn't help myself. I'm a sucker for constructive feedback and I could really use some for the starter of this new multi-chapter fic. I wish it were possible to label a story as "NJBC" when you select the characters since it's supposed to be focused on them. I labeled it Chuck and Blair since the main storyline focuses on them and depending on how far the story continues Nate and Serena might be featured less.

This story takes place in 2015 and is based on the ending of season four and loosely on some of the filming pics that have been released (no spoilers though). This first chapter is basically a "_this has happened_" segment meaning the actual action doesn't kick in until chapter two. Still I hope you'll be able to get a feel for what the story will be like and I would very much appreciate any thoughts on the set-up. I hope it isn't a dull read since there's not really any plot in this first installment. This part is also quite text-heavy whereas the other chapters will have far more dialogue.

I've read through this chapter once myself but I should have done so twice since I then changed around some dates… If you find any inconsistencies with the dates please let me know!

* * *

><p>Blair's mouth was completely dry and she absentmindedly rubbed her arms as she shivered. She couldn't believe this was happening.<p>

She was back in New York, one of her rare visits. Since she left the city with Louis roughly four years prior she had only made scarce appearances in the city that had once been her home, the city she had never thought she would want to leave. Part of her really longed to move back here but the way things were she couldn't.

She slowly sunk down on the couch, her mind retracing the steps, going back all the way to when she had left with Louis. Everything that had happened since then came back to her and she recognized a number of points where things could have taken different turns, turns that would have kept her safe from ending up where she was now.

It was all so vivid in her memory. Louis' proposal. Her happiness with Chuck at the bar mitzvah. How devastatingly difficult it had been to let go of Chuck. The pregnancy test that had turned out to be positive. The seven weeks she spent agonizing over the knowledge that she was pregnant without knowing who the father was, trying to decide what she should do. The moment she told Louis about her condition and found out that he was barren.

If she lived for a hundred years more she would never forget that conversation. After spending so many weeks trying to figure out what to do she had at last decided that at least Louis needed to know. They were engaged to be married and she could not keep her secret from him much longer. He needed to know she was going to have a baby and he needed to know that he might not be the father. Only it turned out she had spent an hour in front of the mirror practicing how to break that part of the news to him in vain, since he knew the child's paternity as soon as he heard that there was a child. He could not have children, he told her. He had found out a few years back that he fired blanks. While the news on one hand was a relief it also sparked a big problem and a lot of anger in Blair. She was relieved that she didn't have to wonder anymore who the father was. She had a problem in that she was carrying Chuck's child while engaged to another man, another man who so happened to be a prince. She was angry that Louis had known that he couldn't impregnate a woman but he had kept it from her. A detail like that was rather important to know before you made the decision to spend your life with someone.

They had argued. Louis had had a very hard time coming to terms with her being pregnant by someone Louis knew she still loved. He seemed to think that she was further along than she actually was and that the baby had been conceived right before Louis had arrived in New York, thus he was not mad that she had cheated even if he was mad that Blair hadn't said anything sooner. Blair didn't set him straight. She wasn't sure she wanted to keep planning their wedding or if she wanted to get out of it. It was starting to become a media circus and it frightened her to think what would happen if she broke the whole thing off.

Luckily, though surprisingly, they were able to keep the pregnancy a secret for quite some time. Blair was barely showing at all, a fact which disappointed her since once she had come to terms with being pregnant she had looked forward to having a nice, maternal baby bump. Yet she was well into her fifth month before there was anything to even call a bump and on the day she delivered the baby she looked like she was maybe six months along. She had complained to her doctor but he had shrugged it off and told her that some women simply don't get large bumps. Apparently it all depended on how the child was carried. The fact that her baby chose to be discreet bought her time to figure things out but at the same time she knew that the longer she waited the more difficult it would be.

The engagement ended up falling through. Louis could not make peace with the idea of Chuck Bass' child possibly inheriting the throne and Blair could not make peace with the knowledge that Louis had kept his sterility from her. In addition the idea of passing Chuck's child off as Louis' did not sit well with her at all. Finally she and Louis went their separate ways, when Blair was six months pregnant and still able to conceal the bump through clever clothing.

She headed for Paris to avoid the paparazzi that were probably expecting her to arrive in New York. While she sat on the plane she daydreamed of the future she could have with Chuck and the baby. She knew with every fiber in her body that leaving Louis was the right thing to do. This baby belonged to her and Chuck and it was a clear-cut sign that she and Chuck belonged together. She wasn't sure how he would take the news or how she would break it to him but she would find a way. When two people belonged together they would always find a way.

Before she could return to New York she got a phone call from Nate.

"_I saw the news about your engagement_" he said, barely throwing a '_hello_' in there first. "_Sorry it didn't work out. You guys moved too fast._"

"_So it seems_" Blair said, stroking the tiny bump on her belly and thinking more of Chuck than of the guy she was on the phone with.

"_I'm calling because I wonder what you're going to do next_" Nate said frankly. She heard him curse at someone who apparently drove recklessly while he walked through the city and then his attention was back on her. "_Blair please tell me you're not planning on trying to give it another shot with Chuck._"

The request stunned Blair to silence. She listened for a full minute to the sounds of New York traffic on the other end while trying to think of something to say, or how to react. Nate sounded very disapproving on the phone when he continued.

"_If you have any intentions on getting back together with Chuck then as his best friend I must tell you to abandon them. Right now._"

"_Nate… What… What are you talking about? And why is this any of your business?_"

"_Things haven't exactly been splendid around here since you left_" Nate said. "_Letting you go was the hardest thing Chuck has ever done. You don't know what it did to him._"

"_So why are you objecting to the idea of me and Chuck getting back together_?" Blair wondered.

"_You made your choice. He was a mess. But he's beginning to move on now._"

Blair swallowed, an unpleasant feeling spreading in her chest.

"_I don't know what you're talking about._"

"_I find that hard to believe. You know, Emmy's been good for him._"

"_Emmy_?" Blair echoed. Who the hell was Emmy?

"_Yeah, Chuck's new girlfriend_" Nate pointed out. "_Haven't you checked _Gossip Girl_ recently?_"

"_I'd rather not read what she has to say about my botched engagement._"

"_For the past couple of weeks Chuck has been seeing this girl Emmy. He was sinking and now he's not anymore. If you knew what a mess he had been you wouldn't do anything to disrupt his life now that he's beginning to pull it together._"

"_If he was a mess over losing me then the only thing that _can_ pull him together is me_" Blair argued.

"_Yeah but for how long?_" Nate wondered. "_How long will it be before you leave him again? He can't go through that again. You shouldn't come back and toy with his emotions now. It would be cruel._"

"_Toy with his emotions_?" Blair echoed in an offended snort.

"_The fact is you could have had him, hell you had him on a silver platter, but you chose Louis. Now that things are effed up between you and the prince it's only natural that you'd come looking for the man you gave up. He's my best friend and he can't be your consolation prize. I can't pick up the pieces when he's broken again and I can't watch him go through something like that one more time. _"

"_Chuck has never been my consolation prize_" Blair snarled, feeling the baby kick as if to agree with her and underline her words. "_There's something very important that I need to tell Chuck and I don't care what you say._"

"_You chose Louis_" Nate repeated. "_You made your choice. Chuck has moved on. It's not okay for you to come and try and beckon him back now. He stepped away and let you try and make things work with Louis without his interfering. You owe him the same courtesy. He's only been with Emmy for a short while, who knows, perhaps it's over tomorrow. But seriously Blair he has the chance to move on and find something new that matters in his life. Even without Emmy I would be hesitant to you coming back to try and make him yours again but as things are now I cannot let you destroy his chances of having a significant relationship with her. It would be cruel Blair._"

Blair swallowed and tried to keep the tears away. All she wanted was to tell Chuck about the baby and rebuild their relationship. Just thinking about him with another woman made her heart ache but at the very least she knew she needed to tell Chuck about their child. Though if she was completely truthful she had no doubt that once Chuck knew they were having a baby together he would forget all about any other woman and be hers again.

"_Leave Chuck and me to Chuck and me_" she told Nate. "_There's something important that I need to discuss with him and it is _not_ me telling him how much I still…_"

She drifted off. The sound of a large car horn filled her ears and she wished Nate could have called her up when he was inside rather that out in traffic.

"_Whatever it is you can tell him over the phone_" Nate decided. "_I'm serious about this Blair. I can't _control_ you… but if you come back here and mess up the good thing he's got going on then you'll answer to me._"

Blair sighed heavily and wished Nate wasn't such a drama queen. She thought he sounded way too over-protective and rather ridiculous. Chuck was a big boy and he didn't need Nate's protection. She didn't know the things Chuck had been struggling with during the months that had passed since her departure from New York. She didn't know how he had been seeking out dangers and putting himself in harm's way in the hope that physical pain would distract him from the emotional pain.

Dan knew. He had been witness to a few of these incidents and caught enough information from Nate as to understand the reasons for Chuck's reckless behavior. To Dan it was further proof that Chuck Bass was unstable and unreliable.

He arrived in Paris two days after Blair. He had visited her a few times while she was in Monaco and now that her engagement was over he sought her out in Paris. He claimed he needed refuge from the States and the reactions to his book. Few people depicted in the book had been pleased with what they read and his list of friends was growing thin at the moment. Nate still hung out with him but Dan pretty openly disliked Chuck nowadays which Nate did not appreciate. It annoyed Dan that Nate would be on Chuck's side over Dan's and he was convinced Nate simply refused to see the real Chuck. Until he did it was a subject better left untouched but it made hanging out with Nate less comfortable than it had used to be.

There was another reason why he kept running to Blair but he hadn't brought it up with her yet. He had feelings for her, but making those feelings known when she was engaged didn't seem appropriate, nor did it seem very wise to try and woo her while she was carrying another man's child.

Blair couldn't understand why Dan kept coming to see her, even if she didn't mind his visits. By now he knew that she was pregnant and he was the only one of her friends who knew. She hadn't told Serena because the two of them weren't on solid terms right now and she wasn't sure what she would say to her. But Dan being the only one who knew was about to change. To hell with Nate and his warnings, Blair had her mind set on going back to the Upper East Side and telling Chuck all about what had happened in the past six months.

When Dan heard about it he was immediately convinced it was a horrible idea. Chuck Bass could under no circumstances make for an appropriate father. Not now and perhaps not ever. Normally Dan would advocate for a father's right to know about his baby but given everything he had witnessed with Chuck in the past year he thought it would be a really bad idea for him to get involved. He advised Blair to at least wait for a little while longer. At the back of his mind he wondered if his insistence in part had to do with his own strong feelings for Blair and how it made him sick to his stomach to picture Blair cooing over a baby together with Chuck. Still he felt his concerns regarding Chuck's parental aptitude were justified and he did his best to convince Blair not to tell him.

Confused over everything Dan was saying, the things Nate had said and her own feelings Blair ended up not knowing what to do. She retreated to Harold and Roman's chateau in order to figure things out. She only had a few more months to do so and before she knew it she had no time at all. She was too pregnant to dare fly and above all she was scared of being caught by paparazzi and photographed this way. The idea of her pregnant picture becoming public before she had had a chance to talk to Chuck was frightening. And she couldn't very well call Chuck and ask him to casually stop by in France for a little chat. She would have to tell him about the baby after the child had been born. It was as far from ideal as she could possibly get but it didn't seem like there was any other choice.

In February the child arrived. A healthy baby boy. She named him Sebastian Charles Waldorf and found herself crying herself to sleep the night of his birth over the fact that there was no father there to sign the birth certificate. She had messed everything up for herself and for her newborn son. During the first five weeks she stayed with Sebastian at her father's chateau, knowing she couldn't leave her baby and travel across the Atlantic and afraid that it might be dangerous to take such a small child on such a long flight. Plus she would certainly not be able to sneak back to the Upper East Side unnoticed with a baby.

Dan Humphrey came to visit and they talked at length about the baby's lack of a father. Blair wanted to tell Chuck everything but Dan kept insisting that he would be a toxic influence on the child and that she needed to think about what was best for the baby and not for herself or Chuck. Blair protested that what was best for her son was to have a father in his life. Dan was more than willing to take on a fatherly role and claimed himself to be an apt candidate for the job. Blair rolled her eyes and asked him how Milo was doing these days.

As time went by it became increasingly difficult to go back home and tell Chuck the truth. Keeping the baby secret from him during the pregnancy was one thing, and it was bad enough in itself. Waiting for months after the baby's birth to tell him was something else entirely. She had no good reason for why she had waited. She wasn't sure he would understand. She barely understood it herself, looking back. Each day made it more difficult and before she knew it she had reached the point where it seemed impossible. Too much time had passed. She knew she had to tell him at some point but she kept postponing it, kept hiding in her secluded dream at the chateau.

And thus things had continued for three years. Sebastian was a little person now. Chuck had missed out on his entire babyhood. Blair had only made a few visits to New York; none of them had included bringing Sebastian. Her visits had only lasted a few days at a time and somehow she had managed to become uninteresting while she was away. The media could care less that the American girl who had briefly been engaged to the prince of Monaco was in town. _Gossip Girl_ had eventually closed shop without anyone ever finding out who she was. Blair's visits slipped by unnoticed and she purposely avoided seeing her old friends. Even Serena. She knew it would be too difficult to hang out with Serena and not share her big secret but their friendship was frail now and a bomb like that would certainly destroy it for good.

This time around Blair had arrived in the city in early spring. She had only been there one night before she was contacted by a shady journalist who claimed he had information about her she wouldn't want to be made public. Blair had quickly looked up who he was online while they spoke and found that he was a journalist with quotation marks around the profession. He owned an online magazine which focused mostly on gossip, like a larger version of _Gossip Girl_. And he claimed to know she had a three year-old son hidden away in France and said he would post the news on his site unless she paid him to keep the information unpublished.

While his site may not exactly be the Times Blair knew that if the information got posted there it would soon spread. The possibility of a secret son to the prince of Monaco would be too juicy to let lie. It seemed to her that this journalist, Malcolm, would have much more to gain from posting the news than by blackmailing her but it was what it was. He demanded three million dollars of her, money she did not have, at least not available to simply hand out. He told her she had ten days to gather it or her secret would be out.

For the first fifteen minutes after their conversation ended Blair just stared blankly out in space, rubbing her arms. The whole thing made no sense. Why would anyone use something like this for blackmail? It was ridiculous. Why would he give her ten days to get the money? It wasn't logical. How did he even know about Sebastian to begin with? And just how much did he know? He had made no mention of the boy's paternity which led her to believe he thought the child was Louis'. That was what anyone would think, given when he had been born. Only Chuck would know there was another possible father.

Blair wasn't particularly worried how Louis would react if all this became public. He already knew everything. And she doubted that there would be much news value regarding Blair herself. There were two other things that caused her concern. One was the idea of Chuck finding out this way and drawing his own conclusions. The other was the thought of her poor boy being the focus of all that media attention. Even if Blair herself was uninteresting to the media Sebastian would be a different story. They would all assume he was a hidden prince of Monaco. He would be stuck with that label all his life and either forced to pretend to be a bastard child of their royal family forever or become the face of the scandalous idea that perhaps the prince's fiancée had not been faithful to him. Someone might even peg him to be Chuck's son. It wasn't too far a stretch of the imagination that somebody would make that guess given her history with Chuck. In addition there were probably a lot of pictures taken that night at the bar mitzvah where she and Chuck appeared together.

All that attention would be far too much for a three year-old boy. And it would color the rest of his life. He'd never be completely free of the scandal, always stuck with the labels that came with it. Blair could not have that. At the back of her mind she knew she couldn't keep him hidden away at the chateau forever but it would be different if she brought him out into the public eye in her own way. She had thought about faking his date of birth and claiming him to be a year younger than he was but mostly she figured nobody would care if she came back to New York with a child, at least not care enough to connect any dots. If the news was published online like that it would be a whole other story. Malcolm could present it any way he wanted to.

Blair got up and paced back and forth in the room. Right now she wasn't thinking mainly about the repercussions if her secret became public. Her mind was more focused on the mystery of why he would blackmail her. She stopped pacing and realized she needed to do something proactive rather than just sit in her hotel room and try to understand what was really happening. She could mull that part over later.

One thing she knew with certainty. She needed help. She couldn't handle this situation on her own. She had to have a strategy and she had to have connections. She hadn't done any real scheming in years now and she barely had any viable connections left in New York City. She needed to gather troops, people she could trust.

She needed Chuck Bass. It was a gamble, he might decide to find out what her secret was or even refuse to help her out if she didn't tell him all the details at the start. But she would have to take the chance. If she didn't get his help he would probably find everything out soon enough anyway. Chuck had a scheming mind as brilliant as his own, he thought similar to her yet different enough that they could complete each other in their plotting. He had connections, lacked scruples and loyalty had always been one of his hallmarks. She would call him first and ask for his help.

She needed Serena. The two of them had drifted apart, sure, but their ties went back too far to completely be ignored. Blair felt a strong need for her lifelong bestie to be there until they had solved this. And whatever connections Chuck lacked Serena probably had. Besides, it would be near impossible to include Chuck and not have Serena get word eventually and it would only make their friendship more frosty if that were to happen.

She needed Dorota. At least for smaller things such as getting equipment they might need or running other errands.

She needed Dan. He was the only one outside Louis and her family who knew about Sebastian and she had to have someone on board who knew the whole story. She couldn't bear the secret all on her own and he would be a useful sounding board.

She needed Nate. If she were to have both Chuck and Dan involved in the same scheme Nate would be necessary to keep the other two from try to verbally kill each other. In addition Nate had the same quality that Chuck and Serena had, the ability to take part in her schemes without judging her. She needed people around her who wouldn't judge. People around her she could trust. She had relied on Nate, Serena and Chuck for twenty years of her life and felt confident that she could rely on them through this too. And she knew that if she wasn't able to find a way around Malcolm's demands her three friends would be able to help her with the three million dollars.

She sat down on the couch and dialed the first number.

* * *

><p>So… How was that? Does it sound interesting in the least? Let me know please! I won't update this story until I've posted the last BM3 chapter but hopefully this fic will keep at least me entertained during the fall =)<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

I'm really excited with the amount of response I got to the first chapter! It's great that people seem interested in the set-up. This chapter is kind of a continued set-up chapter, most real action will start in chapter three. This wasn't my original idea but I figured the story could use a "reunion" chapter separate from the main action.

Hope you'll enjoy the read!

* * *

><p>They met up in her mother's penthouse apartment. It was otherwise empty at the moment; Eleanor and Cyrus were in Italy with Sebastian. The knowledge that her boy was with his grandmother somewhere away from the chateau made Blair feel a bit safer, having for a moment worried that this Malcolm fellow would resort to kidnapping next. Since the penthouse was vacant Blair had decided to move out of her hotel room and make this place headquarters for her little operation. It looked much the same as it had when she had lived there herself. The only changes were to the curtains, flowers and the addition of an antique clock her mother had purchased at an auction.<p>

Blair sat on a chair, her back straight and nowhere near touching the back of the chair. Her legs were kept closely together and her hands rested in her lap, making her look like she was trying to copy a picture of a perfect lady in the forties. She tried to keep her face casual but she was too nervous to completely pull it off. She had not been in the same room with these three people for so long, not with all of them at one time. It hadn't dawned on her until now that neither of them might feel inclined to helping her out, especially since they would only get bits and pieces of the story. Yet seeing them again gave her a feeling of strength. If they stood by her now as they had done in the past she knew that she at least had a good crew on her side.

How they had all changed. All three of them. Serena's long blond hair had been cut into a stylish bob and it seemed like she had at last figured out what a hairbrush was for. Her hair had never looked shinier or more proper and it went well with the brown mocha pants she wore and her cream colored silk blouse. Serena van der Woodsen had become a professional party planner but dressed more like a professional attorney and carried around a large leather bag filled to the brim with binders, calendars and pens in every imaginable color. She wore as much makeup now as she ever had, though in more discreet tones and was trying her best to appear professional. She used her former IT-girl status to draw in clients but wanted people to take her seriously and to make it clear that she intended to stay in the background at the functions she arranged rather than steal the spotlight.

Nate was in his second year of Columbia law school and had rid his closet of all things plaid and now wore mostly dress pants and striped shirts, always with the top button undone and never with a tie unless necessary. His bangs were gone, in fact he had followed Serena's suit and cut his hair much shorter. Blair preferred the longer hair he had had back in the day but realized that he was trying to wash off some of the boyish qualities he had had in the past. He had also started to grow a beard which fitted him better than Blair would have thought. From what she had gathered he was planning on going into politics before he turned thirty but she didn't know what his exact political beliefs were these days. He was tanned and fit and seemed the picture of health, sitting next to Serena on the couch. He had leaned forward a bit as if ready to jump up and get to work as soon as someone gave him a task to do and he had a warm smile on his face which made Blair feel more relaxed. When he first walked off the elevator he had babbled non-stop for five minutes about the tennis game he had just come from, apparently even more into sports these days. Blair found herself wondering if he was single or if there was some young woman out there entertaining the thought of becoming Mrs. Archibald within the next year or two.

Blair had barely cast a look at Chuck since he walked in. Years of daydreaming about him, of reliving old memories, now made her nervous to meet him again and see how much he had changed. She didn't expect him to still be the Chuck Bass she had practically lived with after high school. At the same time she worried that he might still be able to see right into her soul the way he had done before. Would he realize her secret just by looking at her? Would she betray her own persistent feelings for him by being unable to take her eyes off of him once she had let them take a good look?

She had to look at him eventually. So she cast a few quick glances at him, trying to keep them casual. He was the same, yet different. At twenty-three, nearly twenty-four, all traces of the boy had seemed to have left him. Nate still had some of his boyhood in him and so did Dan Humphrey but when Blair looked at Chuck all she saw was a man. He was composed, held a certain authority. He had become the man the way his father had been, yet where Bart had been stone-faced and seemed unapproachable Chuck had a charisma that drew people in. Or maybe it was just her own musings, her own deep feelings for him that made her assume everyone else saw him the same way she did.

He was dressed in a grey suit which looked more expensive than the entire contents of Blair's closet. He was casually leaned back on the divan, right leg crossed over the left, his eyes studying her with vague interest beneath his bangs. Nate and Serena may have cut their hair shorter but Chuck had let his grow a little bit and at least today he hadn't slicked it back. He wore an expensive Cartier watch on his right arm. Blair let out a breath she hadn't known she was holding when she glanced at his hands, clasped in his lap, and saw that there was no wedding band there. Too bad America didn't have the custom of the man wearing the golden band as an engagement ring the way some European countries did. Then she would know whether or not he was engaged to anyone.

It was odd knowing so little about his life. When she had first retreated to the chateau she had intended on keeping a close eye on his endeavors via _Gossip Girl_ and the media but that resolve had only lasted two days. Then she had opened a magazine and seen a picture of him kissing his new girlfriend at a club and another picture where he looked at her with the kind of eyes Blair felt should be reserved for her. Jealousy had been too much to handle and she had decided she would try to avoid reading about him instead. She wondered how bad he must have felt when her romance with Louis was everywhere in the press and wondered how he had been able to stand it. According to Nate he hadn't done so well.

The result of all this was that Blair knew next to nothing of his endeavors in the past three years. His business seemed to be thriving but that was about all she could tell from just looking at him. Sadly there was no hint in his eyes as to his feelings for her. Did he love her still? Was he indifferent to her now? Was he as drawn to her as she was to him?

Seeing him now was different than it had been before. He was not just Chuck Bass, lifelong friend and great love. He was Sebastian's father. She hadn't expected it to feel so different but it did. It increased her love for him and made her feel more connected to him than she could ever remember feeling in the past. Every move that he made now was of a new interest to her. Would her son one day display those mannerisms? Was that how her boy would look when he was in his mid-twenties? He was the person who had given her Sebastian and she knew with certainty that it was time that he knew the truth. Though not just yet. Not here, with Nate and Serena present. And not while she needed his mind on other things. But before she went back to France she would tell Chuck everything.

"So what is this thing you need help with?" Nate asked cheerfully.

"I'm about to ask a big favor of all of you" Blair said nervously. "Remember how we used to do takedowns together? How we used to protect one another? I'm in a bit of a pickle and you guys were the only ones I felt I could trust."

"It's been almost four years since we were close…" Serena pointed out mildly.

"I know" Blair said. "I know you don't owe me any favors."

"If you need help you get our help, whether you have favors to collect or not" Chuck said, speaking up for the first time since he had arrived. "You know that. That's why you called us."

It was the first time she had heard his voice in years. When she had called him before she had only gotten to voicemail with the outgoing message recorded by his secretary. His voice had deepened a bit over the past couple of years but Blair decided she liked the change. And she liked the calm way in which he spoke.

"What seems to be the problem?" Nate asked. "You didn't break any federal laws did you? That's not why you've been staying out of the country is it?"

Chuck cackled a bit at that suggestion. The trace of a smile appeared on Blair's face at the sound of it but it was gone just as soon.

"Here's the thing" she said and rose from her chair while twisting her fingers. "Someone is trying to blackmail me."

"How much?" Chuck asked.

"Three million but that's not the problem."

Nate whistled at the sum. Blair wasn't sure if he was serious or sarcastic. Serena shook her head.

"Blair why is someone trying to blackmail you? And why call us and not the police?"

"No, the police is out of the question."

She began to pace back and forth. She had immediately discarded the idea of contacting any form of authorities. The last thing she wanted was for more people to be involved in this mess, and if she got this guy arrested he might go ahead and publish the story.

"There's this _thing_" she began. "Some pretend-journalist got his hand on some juicy stuff from my personal life and wants three million dollars in exchange for keeping quiet about it."

"What's the thing?" Nate wondered.

"What the thing is does not matter" Blair said. "All that matters is that this secret cannot be published on some gossip website."

"What's the big deal?" Nate shrugged. "You're well used to having your dirty laundry aired on gossip sites."

"No, not this" Blair said. "It affects others, others who I don't want subjected. I'm kind of at a loss here. I don't have any reassurance that this guy will keep his mouth shut if I pay him. What's to stop him from asking for more money when he's spent the three million? Or to go ahead and post this stuff anyway even if I do pay him?"

"Just ask him to hand over whatever proof he has for whatever claims he's making" Serena suggested.

"It's the Internet, who the hell needs proof?" Nate commented, leaning back. "He can post that info whenever he pleases with or without proof. Allegations alone can be enough."

"You need leverage" Chuck concluded.

Blair nodded, smiling unhappily.

"How juicy a scoop can this even be?" Nate wondered. "No offense Blair but nobody cares what you do these days, at least not on a multi-million dollar scale."

"It's not me I'm worried about" Blair said. "Someone else will be much worse off than me if this gets out. Someone they _will_ care to talk about."

"Louis?" Serena guessed.

"Can't be him, they've been over for years" Nate objected.

"She's also been away for years" Serena pointed out. "Whatever the secret is it might be about something that happened while she was with Louis."

"I need leverage on this guy" Blair said. "I need it fast. It needs to be good."

"I don't get it" Chuck said. "Why is this guy asking for money in exchange for gossip? It's just plain stupid. Something else is going on here."

"My thoughts exactly" Blair said. "I just don't know what."

"Digging up dirt on the guy won't be very difficult" Chuck said. "I don't venture finding out what he's really up to will be either. It would be quite a lot easier though if we knew what secret we are trying to protect."

"Yeah Blair" Serena said, moving a strain of hair from her face. "What could you possibly be keeping secret that you can't tell us?"

"It's not just _my_ secret" Blair said.

"So?" Nate shrugged. "Who are we going to tell? Who have we ever told your secrets to?"

Blair rolled her eyes.

"My mother, Dorota, each other, Georgina Sparks, Gossip Girl…"

"We never told any of the _big_ secrets."

"Blair none of us are trying to pry" Chuck said calmly. "It's just a little hard to run interference and go on a quest to save some big secret if we haven't got the first idea what we're trying to protect."

"I need dirt on this jackass and I need it fast" Blair said testily. "You can dig out all his secrets without knowing all of mine, can't you?" Then she looked nervous. "I'm sorry. I know I'm asking a lot here, at least given that I haven't seen you guys much in the past half-decade. This… This is really important to me."

"We'll help" Serena said. "Won't we boys?"

"Yeah" Nate said. "Of course."

"What is step one?" Chuck asked.

"Okay" Blair said, stopping by the fireplace. "Serena, first thing in your list is calling in sick from work."

"Blair I can't do that" Serena said with a little laugh. "I've got three important-"

"Nate, either find someone to do all your assignments for you or find time to do them later" Blair said. "I need you on this full-time. Bass, you call your limo. I need you to go to Newark airport."

"Anything for you Waldorf" Chuck said with a smirk.

"You're picking up Dan and you need to leave within fifteen minutes."

"Except that" Chuck frowned. "What does Humphrey have to do with any of this?"

"He's flying in from LA to help."

"When was he ever a help to anybody?"

"Chuck we need him."

"Yeah he will be invaluable if we need someone to say: '_I'm morally outraged by this_'."

"Just go" Blair said.

With a very heavy sigh Chuck rose from the divan and got his phone out to call for the limo. Blair could have easily asked Nate or Serena to go pick Dan up but she wanted Chuck and Dan to be stuck in the same place for a while before they got started for real. The two guys had never been friends but for the past four years the animosity between them had gotten a lot worse. She didn't know why exactly and right now she didn't have time to worry about it. She knew Dan thought Chuck was every bad adjective in the book and strongly suspected Chuck wasn't exactly crushing on Dan either but they would have to work together right now anyway. Might as well let them fire off their initial insults when they were alone and perhaps after that they would be able to be civil.

"When this is over I would be willing to pay _you_ three million dollars to assure that I never have to hang with the Hump again" Chuck muttered on his way out.

Blair tried to smile positively but the moment he was on the elevator the smile faded and she turned to Nate and Serena who were still sitting on the couch awaiting instructions they felt made more sense.

"What are you two waiting for?" Blair asked. "Go arrange for your time off and then report back here. I'm going to go make a phone call. Excuse me."

She hurried upstairs to call her mother and talk to Sebastian for a while. She felt like she very much needed to hear her baby's voice right now.

* * *

><p>Dan had been eager to get back to New York and was looking forward to seeing Blair and helping her out. His enthusiasm dimmed somewhat when he left baggage claim and spotted Chuck Bass leaned against his limo holding a sign that read: "<em>VUP<em>", no doubt standing for Very Unimportant Person. Dan groaned, rolled his eyes and walked over. Chuck took the sign down and crossed his arms over his chest, eyeing Dan through his expensive sunglasses.

"Did you miss me as much as I missed you?" he asked dryly.

"Not as much as Blair missed me" Dan shot back and handed his bag to the driver.

"Get in" Chuck said with a nod to the open car door. "The sooner we get back to Blair's the sooner we can avoid each other."

"For once I like your thinking" Dan said and got in the car.

He sat down as far away from Chuck as he could even though he knew it was childish to do so. Their relationship was quite infected nowadays and while Dan was determined to at least try and be civil around Blair he wasn't going to pretend to be Chuck's best bud right now.

Chuck crossed one leg over the other and looked out the window, taking off his sunglasses. Dan studied him for a moment. Judging by his mannerism it didn't seem as if Blair had told him the truth yet. Hopefully she never would. Dan could think of few people who would make a worse father to Sebastian than Chuck. He recalled having once thought that a guy always deserved to know if he had gotten a woman pregnant but as time had gone by he had somewhat changed his mind on that. He was convinced there was something mentally wrong with Chuck Bass and even if there wasn't what were the odds of him being able to be a good father? Bart Bass hadn't been by all accounts so why should his son be? Besides it took more than genetics to make someone a parent.

Dan vividly recalled his low opinion of Chuck getting even worse the time he intervened when a group of guys were giving Chuck a beating, only to later find out Chuck had paid them to beat him up. By piecing together bits and pieces of the things Nate said Dan had eventually realized that Chuck had paid to get beaten up because he wanted physical pain to dull out the emotional equivalent. The whole thing seemed utterly screwed-up and unhealthy in Dan's eyes and further cemented his belief that the last person Blair needed in her life was Chuck. If he had been able to trade her for a hotel when he was somewhat emotionally stabile Dan did not like to know what he could do to her when he was an emotional mess.

Of course Dan had not been able to keep his opinions to himself. Chuck did not know that Dan had helped convince Blair to keep her pregnancy secret from him but he had found out that Dan had been talking to Lily, Serena and Nate about Chuck being completely crazy and insisting that they would be better off keeping a distance to him. That in combination with the way Dan had characterized Chuck in his book, and the very fact that Dan had written the book to begin with, had made Chuck's deep dislike grow into full-blown hatred. The fact that Dan had apparently become close to Blair did nothing to help endear him in Chuck's eyes.

As it were now the two of them stuck to trading insults whenever they met and both made sure to meet as seldom as possible. It bothered Dan that Nate had stayed in Chuck's corner and chosen his friendship over Dan's whenever there had been a choice to make. In Dan's eyes Chuck deserved no such loyalty but he had learned that trying to convince Nate of that only made Nate defensive of his friend so Dan had stopped bringing it up.

While they rode to the city Dan wondered why Blair had found it necessary to include Chuck in this scheme. It seemed like she was playing Russian roulette with her secret and with her child's future. The risk of Chuck finding out he had a son was much higher when Chuck was part of Blair's scheme team but Blair had been adamant about including him and either way it had been too late by the time she called Dan since Chuck had been the first person on her list of calls.

"Has Blair filled you in?" he asked, partly out of curiosity and partly to pass the time. "When I spoke to her she hadn't gotten a hold of you, just your voicemail."

"I'm up to date" Chuck said shortly.

"I hope you realize the importance of discretion in this matter" Dan said.

He began a minor monologue on the subject and Chuck ignored him completely and continued to stare out the window.

"Chuck" Dan said. "Are you even listening to me?"

Chuck tore his eyes from the window and looked at his company.

"I've made a habit out of tuning out while you talk. I'll take a nap, ponder the dilemmas of my day, things like that. I find it saves time."

"You don't think you might sometimes need to hear something that I say?" Dan asked.

"I already know what you're going to say when you open your mouth. 'Blah, blah, blah judgment, blah, blah, blah white knight complex, blah, blah, blah hypocrisy'."

Dan rolled his eyes.

"Blair is really lucky to have you fighting for her" he said sarcastically.

"Mmm…" Chuck nodded. "But since when does Blair need anyone to fight for her? We're just the backup singers. And you're the roadie."

Dan rolled his eyes again and gave up on speaking to Chuck. He grabbed his laptop from his bag and switched it on. He then opened a document and began typing away, making a show of how efficient he was being. The fact that he was surfing around imdb writing reviews for the movies he had seen in-flight and not working on any actual project was something Chuck most certainly didn't need to know.

They rode the rest of the way in silence, both wondering if they would be able to stomach each other's presence until Blair's problem had been solved.

* * *

><p>So there's chapter two. Chapter three will be more exciting, I promise =)<p>

Thanks for reading! Please review.


	3. Chapter 3

Hi again. New update, this time it's a bit longer.

Before we go any further there's one thing I should clarify – this story will definitely be Chair-themed. If you don't like the two of them together here's where you want to leave.

This story will also include negative traits of all characters featured, along with the good traits. I don't enjoy writing (or reading) stories where one or more characters are flawless and none will be treated that way. Also keep in mind that none of the characters see things from a completely objective viewpoint. One character presenting a situation a certain way means that's how _that character_ views the situation. It's not necessarily the objective truth nor does the character necessarily have all the facts.

With all that said... Hope this chapter will be enjoyable =)

* * *

><p>"You should be careful" Dan said, watching Blair unpack her bags in her old room forty-five minutes after he arrived at her penthouse.<p>

In spite of the situation at hand Blair had a content smile on her face as she lifted a cashmere sweater from the bag on her bed. She was barely listening to Dan, caught up in the memories of what had happened only thirty minutes before when Nate, Chuck and Serena had gotten ready to leave. Chuck had been waiting for the other two, leaned against the wall in a casual manner. Blair had looked up at him and their eyes had met for real for the first time in four years. It had lasted only a second, maybe two, but it had felt like an eternity and Blair replayed the moment in her mind over and over while Dan talked.

There had still been a connection there. It was unmistakable. When her eyes met Chuck's it was clear to both of them that whatever had once been between them it was not over, no matter how time had changed them.

"_I will always love you._"

Words that had been spoken between two overly dramatic twenty year-olds four years ago. Words that were easily said and probably frequently said but often turned out to be mere words when you looked back on them later on in life. Not so between Blair and Chuck, she knew that when their eyes met. She had always known it but she knew it now with more certainty. She still loved him and he still loved her and they always would feel that way. In the brief moment when their eyes met there was only the two of them, the other three in the room ceased to exist. Even Blair's dilemmas vanished for a brief moment. Chuck was there. Together with Chuck she could find a solution to any problem.

"Why do I get the feeling you're not listening?" Dan said, running a hand through his hair.

"You have my full attention" Blair lied serenely and folded a skirt.

"Good because I think you're taking a huge gamble asking Chuck to take part in all this" Dan said. "Blair you cannot risk him finding out about the child."

"He has a right to know Dan" Blair said. "I never intended on keeping Sebastian from him forever. You know that. You know I was going to tell him but there was always a reason to put it off until I had put it off for far too long."

"Yeah, did you stop to think that maybe it's fate that you haven't been able to tell him yet?" Dan said.

"Fate would not give me his son and then go out of its way to make sure he never knows about it" Blair pointed out. "Before I go back to France Chuck is learning the truth."

"Blair I'm serious, this is a bad idea" Dan said, stepping closer. "You don't even know anything about his life these days or who he is."

"True" Blair said. "But no matter who he has become he will always be my Chuck at heart. You don't know him like I do Dan. All you see is the negative."

"All you see is the positive."

"I'm well aware of his faults" Blair argued. "I just don't think that his whole character can be defined by his worst moments. You wouldn't be much of a catch yourself if we defined you by any of your low points. None of us would be."

"Some people's low points are worse than other's" Dan mumbled. He then shook his head. "I don't get it, what are we even doing here trying to keep your secret hidden if you're going to tell Chuck everything anyway?"

"Protecting Sebastian from the media exposure" Blair pointed out. "Avoiding dragging the Grimaldis into this mess even further. Besides, I want to tell Chuck on my own terms."

Dan began to comment on this but Blair wasn't listening. Her mind was on Chuck. At first she had thought it was necessary to keep the truth hidden from him until this whole thing had blown over so that he would focus on the task at hand but after the look they had shared she felt differently. If one look could have that affect on her then there was no doubt in her mind that she and Chuck were intended for one another. He loved her still, as much as she loved him, she did not doubt it for a second. She dared to hope again for a future for them. But in order for them to have such a future Chuck needed to know the truth as soon as possible. She couldn't begin to reform a relationship with him and then tell him about their son after a few weeks. He had to know right from the start or their foundation would be shaken.

Plus, she thought, he was in his full right to be furious with her for keeping the truth hidden. The sooner he learned the truth the better the chances of a less angry reaction. And this was Chuck Bass after all. Knowing that this whole gathering of troops was in the interest of protecting his son would only make him more ardent in getting the situation dealt with. Even if he was mad at Blair he would still do everything in his power to protect the child.

"I should stay here while this is going on" Dan said, bringing her back to present. "You shouldn't be alone."

"Don't be ridiculous Humphrey" Blair said. "I'm fine."

"No really, I think I should stay. Keep you company."

"Dan. I'm not exactly in the mood for staying up late watching movies."

"Come on, it's been years since that was all there was to our friendship."

"Maybe so" Blair said, wanting to be alone so she could flee into the fantasy she was beginning to build in her mind. "But you're staying with your dad. Now shoo. I intend on taking a hot bath and going to bed early and you're not invited to either event. Tomorrow is a busy day and I need to be ready for it."

Dan looked skeptical but nodded. He walked over and gave her a quick hug, which surprised her a little, and then left. The moment he was gone her mind was back to Chuck. Thinking of him made being without her son more bearable and she walked to her bathroom to draw a bath, daydreaming of what life could be like if she and Chuck were reunited and the two of them could have a life together with their son.

* * *

><p>Serena and Nate had dutifully agreed to arrange to take time off from work and school until Blair's crisis had passed. Chuck had made no such agreement and Blair had not expected him to. If Chuck wanted to go to work he would go to work and if Chuck felt he needed time off he would take it without a moment's notice. He was the boss after all.<p>

Blair went to visit him at his office in his new hotel Champion located on the Upper East Side. She had been awake for hours that night thinking about how she would tell him about their son. In the morning she had decided she would tell him right away, no putting it off any further. Serena, Nate and Dan were all showing up at the penthouse to talk strategy and divide labor around eleven so she had two hours to go to Chuck's office and talk to him.

She was let in immediately, which she had expected to be even if he was busy. His office was beautifully furnished in a combination of white and black, with white walls and carpet making it seem bright and even more spacious than it already was. Chuck was rummaging through binders in a bookcase when she walked in and he looked up with an apologetic smile.

"It's nine-thirty in the morning" he said. "I thought role-call was at eleven."

"It is…" Blair said. "There's something I need to talk to you about first."

"I'll be with you in a second, I just need to find a file…"

Blair nodded and walked further inside the large office, enjoying the way it felt to be in his presence. While she waited she entertained herself by taking a good look around. For the most part the room was strictly business. Large bookcases, a large desk, a thick black rug on the floor and a couple of ergonomic chairs. These details didn't interest her much. What caught her interest were the details that were of a more personal nature.

On one of the walls Chuck had hung two movie posters. When they were kids they had all said they would have movie posters in their offices someday because movies were cool. Chuck had apparently stuck to that plan. One of the posters was "_Casablanca_" and the other "_Alien_". A very random combination indeed. Blair walked closer and studied the "_Alien_" poster.

"Nice huh?" Chuck commented, glancing up at her. "Not exactly what people expect to find in the office of a person like me. It helps take people off guard and feel more relaxed. That way they are more easily manipulated. That one actually isn't mine, it's-"

"Bart had it, right?"

"How did you guess?"

"It's not a guess. I remember seeing it in his office when we were kids. I thought it was so beautiful with that glow and all… So I watched the movie. Didn't sleep for like a month."

He chuckled and it made her smile. Then he muttered a curse under his breath and grabbed another set of binders to start eyeing through them. Blair decided not to say anything else at the moment but once he had found his file she would jab him about the lack of a "_Terminator_" poster. When they were kids he had often said he was going to have a poster from that movie in his office when he was an adult, for no other reason than that the movie was awesome but too much of an action flick to be considered office material.

She walked slowly around the room, getting a good look. She walked around his desk and her eyes landed on one of the few framed pictures he had. It was a headshot of the endoskeleton from "_Terminator_" framed as if it were a portrait of a family member. The sight greatly amused Blair but her laughter died instantly when she noticed the picture sitting next to it on his desk. It was of him and a woman, taken during a vacation. They were both sporting swimwear and sat together on a sun chair, Chuck having his arm around the woman and she taking the picture. They smiled brightly at the camera and there was no doubt that she was looking at a picture of a happy couple.

Suddenly she wanted to be anywhere else but in this office. Chuck had a girlfriend. A girlfriend he seemed happy with. She had known it was a possibility yet it hurt so bad to see it proven. He had a girlfriend he vacationed with, took pictures with, put pictures of up in his office. Blair felt sick, ready to lose her breakfast. She couldn't have him, someone else already did. She glanced over at the flower in a pot in the corner of the room and briefly wondered what Chuck would say if she actually did throw up into it.

Chuck walked over and tossed a file down on the desk.

"At last" he exhaled. "Thought I'd never find it."

Blair said nothing. Her mouth had gone dry and she wasn't sure she could find anything to say. At least not without betraying her sudden gloominess. She walked away from the desk and parked herself in front of the posters, looking at them without seeing them. Anything was better than looking at him right now, or at his desk for that matter.

Chuck looked up from his file.

"I'm sorry. There was something you needed to talk to me about?"

Blair felt a strike of panic. She couldn't tell Chuck about Sebastian. Not in her present state of mind. Not when there was a girlfriend to consider.

"No" she backtracked. "I mean… I just stopped by to see if I could convince you to take time off like the others are doing. You know, until this is over."

He studied her with entertainment and interest. He knew she was lying. She knew he knew she was lying. Damn him and his ability to tell when her eyes didn't match her mouth.

"You still intrigue me every time we meet Waldorf…" he said smiling. "I wonder what changed your mind about bringing up whatever you wanted to bring up." Then he shrugged. "Have it your way. If there's nothing else I'll see you at eleven, I suppose. If you'll excuse me this file needs my attention."

Blair walked out of the room with complete composure. The moment the door closed behind her she started running, needing to get away from that office as soon as possible.

* * *

><p>Their early lunch assembly forced her to take her mind off the pain she had been in since seeing the picture in Chuck's office. She wouldn't have minded curling up on her bed feeling sorry for herself but there were things going on that were more urgent than her heartbreak. Whether or not she could be with Chuck again and even him finding out about Sebastian could wait. Right now it was more important to keep the news of Sebastian's existence from ending up posted online for everyone to see.<p>

Still she wasn't very keen on seeing Chuck right now. She almost wished he would call or text and tell her something had come up and he wouldn't be able to make it today. She needed his assistance but she really didn't want to have to see him and know that he belonged to someone else. In her heart he was _her_ Chuck and she had never been able to stomach it when he dated other women. It was even more difficult now when he was the father of her son.

Slowly and dejectedly she walked down the stairs when she heard people arriving. Serena's and Nate's voices could be heard playfully bickering about something. Blair didn't bother putting on a smiling face for them.

"Aw, B" Serena said when she spotted her. "You look so sad. Don't worry, we'll have this thing sorted out in no-time."

"Not everything can be easily sorted out" Blair sulked and slumped on the couch.

"We'll try our best, okay?" Nate said and sat down next to her, giving her an encouraging smile. "When our group has gathered forces when have we ever failed, huh?"

The elevator rang and Chuck walked out with a displeased face, followed by Dan who didn't look much happier. They had arrived at the same time and reluctantly shared an elevator up. Chuck took off the hat he was wearing and twirled it in his hands, taking a seat on the divan and throwing one leg over the other.

"How about lunch before we get things started?" he said.

"Really?" Dan questioned. "We have a big problem on our hands and your concern is getting something to _eat_?"

"The mind works better with carbs" Chuck said.

"Yeah, like _carbs_ are what Serena and Blair go for in a meal" Nate snorted.

"Whatever, fine, order something" Blair said sullenly, waving a hand dismissively. "Call Dorota. She's on her way over, she can bring the food with her."

Dan grabbed the landline phone sitting on the coffee table and dialed Dorota's number. Serena suggested Italian food and nobody protested. He walked into the kitchen and Blair got up from her seat and followed him, realizing she had made preparations. She came back with a large white pad on a stand and multiple markers.

"We need to organize" she said. "Our goal is to find something we can use to blackmail this sucker right back and to find out what's really behind all of this. No chance in hell he's blackmailing me over gossip just for shits and giggles." She drew two columns on the pad, one for each goal, and used a blue marker for one and green for the other to keep them separated. "Let's hear it people. Any brilliant ideas?"

"About goal number one," Chuck said, putting his feet down on the floor and leaning forward, "why don't I just give a call to one of my PIs and they'll look into it? Actually that can cover goal number two as well."

"No!" Blair said sharply. "No PIs. That would be too obvious. He would expect that."

"So?" Nate said, almost chuckling. "It's not like he would be able to do anything about it. And it's not like the PI is going to knock on his door, introduce himself, reveal his profession and then ask to hear all the dirt. They're usually more discreet than that."

"Yeah" Serena said. "I don't see how we could snoop things out better than a professional. Why do all the work ourselves if we can just pay someone to do it better?"

Blair frowned, twisting her fingers again. She couldn't send Chuck's PIs to do the work. They would undoubtedly find out what the secret in question was and then definitely tell their Bass boss. She couldn't let that happen until she was ready to tell him herself. She needed people she could control better.

"This is far too sensitive a matter to let Chuck's random cop-rejects handle it" she said.

"Mike quit the force by his own choice" Chuck said, leaning back again.

Then his phone rang with "_White Light Moment_" as the ring tune which surprised Blair. She had never heard him use ring tunes other than the standard ones. He fished the phone out of his pocket without looking to see who it was and answered it. Blair intuitively concentrated to hear his end of the conversation even though Serena was saying something at the same time.

"We just got here so this might go on for a while" Blair heard him say. "Yeah… Yeah I can do that. Sure. Or rather I'll have Alice fix it. Okay. Me too. Bye."

Alice was the name of his secretary, that much Blair had picked up on earlier that morning. He put his phone away again and Nate raised an eyebrow.

"Something going on?" he asked.

"Business as usual" Chuck said casually. Then he turned to Blair, who was busy trying to determine if the caller had been his girlfriend or not based on the fact that it had been a non-standard ring tune and he had known who it was before answering. His voice saying her name brought her back to reality.

"Honestly Blair this whole thing sounds weird. What exactly are the perks to us handling this ourselves?"

"I didn't realize you had all become so boring over the last four years" Blair said. "When presented with the opportunity to dig up some dirt and orchestrate a good old-fashioned takedown I thought the three of you would be eager to get on board. Instead it seems you have all become middle-aged since I left New York."

"Not middle-aged" Nate said. "Just… more grown-up."

"If you're not going to help then just get out" Blair cried, feeling slightly desperate on top of missing Sebastian and being heartbroken over the discovery that Chuck was seeing someone. "I'll find a way to handle it myself. Or almost by myself. At least Dan will stick around and be more helpful than-"

"Relax" Serena said in a soothing voice.

"Want one of my downers?" Chuck offered.

"No" Blair snarled. Then she sighed. "I'm sorry. I know I'm a bit of a mess right now… It's just that this is very important to me and I don't feel comfortable handing it off to private investigators. It can't be that difficult to do some snooping, can it?"

"Well we can't do it sitting around in here" Chuck said. "First of all we need to have a starting point."

"This guy Malcolm works for an online publication" Blair said, writing it down on the pad.

"I know the one" Serena nodded. "I actually have it bookmarked."

Nate and Blair shot her annoyed looks.

"What?" she said with a shrug. "Like you guys don't enjoy gossip so long as it's about other people."

"How about starting with his workplace?" Nate suggested. "Online magazines still have offices. Find out if anyone else knows about his scoop."

"I doubt anyone does" Blair said. "He wants the three million for himself so he wouldn't tell anyone else there about it. Though you're right about checking out the site. It's a good place to start digging dirt."

"So how do we get started on that?" Serena asked.

"Through connections" Chuck said. He rose from the divan as Dan walked back into the room. "Cancel lunch Humphrey. Meeting is adjourned until this evening."

"What?" Dan asked. "What did I miss?"

"You really want to pull on that thread?" Chuck asked dryly.

"I'm not following either" Serena said.

"We need connections before we can do anything else" Chuck explained. "In order to get connections I need to do some research. I do that best on my own without the four of you looking over my shoulder."

"Exactly _how_ do you plan on doing this research?" Dan questioned.

"Meet up with me at seven" Chuck said, walking to the elevator. "I'll text you the location when I know the location."

"But…" Blair began before being cut off by her phone. She frowned and looked at it, wondering who was annoying enough to bother her right now, but when she saw that it was her mother calling she almost forgot she had company. "Okay great, see you at seven" she mumbled to the others, hurrying towards the upper floor to talk to her mother and her son in private.

"Boy was she in a hurry all of a sudden" Nate commented.

"Coming Nate?" Chuck asked, already inside the elevator. "Sis? Humphrey?"

Nate stepped on the elevator but Dan was already heading for the stairs to join Blair upstairs. Serena frowned and took a few steps closer.

"Dan?" she said. "Where are you going?"

"Upstairs" he said, then realized that it probably seemed weird that he would stick around while the others left. "To… to talk to Blair. About something."

"Actually…" Serena said. "I would like to talk to her. You stayed behind last night. My turn today."

Dan glanced up the stairs. He was almost certain Blair was on the phone with Sebastian and he couldn't let Serena walk in on that conversation.

"Well uh…" he began, looking bewildered. "Uhm, well, there's…"

"Dan?" Serena said in a questioning tone.

"Are you guys coming or what?" Nate asked, sticking his head out the elevator.

"You boys go ahead" Serena said without breaking eye-contact with Dan.

Dan's mind worked a mile a minute to try and come up with a good excuse to delay Serena for at least a few minutes, buying Blair some time on the phone with her child. Realizing he couldn't come up with anything non-suspicious on the spot he decided to not give excuses for Blair's solitude and instead distract Serena.

"You know, we really haven't seen each other much over the last year…" he said, walking closer to her. "I can't get over how weird that feels." He ran a hand through his hair. "I barely know what you're up to these days."

"You seem a lot more up to date with Blair's endeavors" Serena remarked.

"Yeah, well…" Dan said and shrugged. "You know, she was the only one who didn't hate my guts after the book came out. Well, Nate didn't… but he had his hands full with that train-wreck he calls roommate."

"Look, I'd love to catch up" Serena said. "Just not right now okay? I need to speak to Blair for a moment."

She walked past him. Reacting on impulse he reached out his hand and grabbed her arm, stopping her.

"Hey wait!" he said.

She gave him a look that was both surprised and annoyed but before either one of them could say anything the elevator rang and Dorota stepped off, in a foul mood and struggling with three large bags.

"Food and equipment here" she said. "If that is all for day then…" She trailed off when she noticed that the only people present were Serena and Dan. Then she huffed. "Oh. So I must hurry to gather things but then hardly no one here, not even Miss Blair."

"Shit, I forgot to tell you, we won't need the food" Dan said, letting go of Serena's arm.

"Oh" Dorota snarled. "Is typical. Miss Blair barely call or write in years and now make me run errands and not even be here."

"I think I'm gonna go" Dan said, eager to get out of the crossfire and figuring Dorota would keep Serena occupied for a little while longer.

"Dan!" Serena said but he was already walking on the elevator. She groaned and turned to Dorota. "Here let me help you with all of that."

"Perhaps I feed Italian food to ducks in Central Park" Dorota griped.

Serena took the bag with food from her and did her best to smile soothingly.

"We're sorry Dorota, we didn't mean to make you hurry and then leave before you got here" she said. "The boys are off doing some research and-"

"What Mister Nate and Mister Chuck and Dan do I don't care" Dorota said, still in a bad mood, putting the other two bags down on the kitchen counter. "Is what Miss Blair do that upset me. I practically raise her then she leave country and barely make call for three years."

"You know Blair" Serena said. "She probably missed you so much that it was easier to not call you so often."

Dorota muttered something in Polish, not sounding the least bit convinced. Serena grabbed some cutlery and smiled again.

"I'm going to take this food upstairs to Blair and once we've eaten we'll come down and see what else you brought" she said.

Dorota didn't look much happier but didn't say anything further, in Polish or English. Serena walked up the stairs with the food and used her foot to push Blair's bedroom door open. She stopped on the threshold, surprised to find Blair sitting slumped on her bed looking miserable.

"B?" Serena said softly.

Blair jumped slightly and quickly turned her head in Serena's direction before looking away again. She used the back of her hand to wipe the tears from her cheeks, hoping Serena would pretend not to notice them, and faked a smile. She hated being away from Sebastian, hated it with a passion, and hearing his little voice telling her about what he and Grandma' and Cyrus had done during the day made her ache to be with him. She wished she could tell Serena everything, wished she already knew everything. Yet it was better to keep the secret for now. Chuck ought to know before anybody else did.

"B…" Serena said again. "Is everything alright?"

"Fine" Blair claimed. "Everything's great. Given the circumstances. I thought you guys all left."

"I stayed…" Serena said hesitantly. "I wanted to talk. If that's okay."

"Sure."

Serena smiled a little.

"I brought food."

"You mean Humphrey forgot to call Dorota and cancel lunch" Blair concluded and laughed a little.

"The good part is Dorota got five different orders since she wasn't sure what everyone would want" Serena said, putting the boxes of food down on the dresser. "What do you feel up for? We've got cannelloni regular, cannelloni chicken, lasagna… Okay she didn't get _very_ different orders, it's all some form of pasta, but at least you get to choose between the three mentioned, pasta pesto and pasta carbonara."

"Give me the pesto" Blair said, switching positions so that she was sitting cross-legged on the middle of the bed.

Serena grabbed two of the boxes and came over to sit down next to Blair.

"Shoot!" she exclaimed. "I forgot something to drink."

"Dorota!" Blair called.

"No, not a good idea" Serena said. "Dorota is not pleased. I'll go get something. You've got stuff in the fridge, right?"

She left the room before Blair could answer. A few minutes later she was back with a bottle of sparkling water and the girls started eating, not saying much at first. Blair wasn't sure what to say to Serena these days. Her secret felt like a huge burden. It was difficult to pretend like her son didn't exist. She knew that when Serena did find out about Sebastian she would be very upset that Blair had said nothing and especially upset that she kept silent even when presented with the opportunity to tell all. All Blair could do was hope that Serena would understand that she needed Chuck to know first. She wasn't quite sure how she would explain having let Dan in on the secret and not Serena but hopefully she would be able to make Serena understand.

"B…" Serena said when she was halfway through her meal. "What's been going on? Over the past four years I mean. You just… took off. I was supposed to come to Monaco and help prepare for the wedding but once the wedding was cancelled it was like you cancelled our friendship at the same time. I know I too took off once without a word but… not for four years."

"A lot has been going on" Blair said. "I needed to stay away for a while. I needed to sort some things out."

"You don't sort things out by running away, trust me on that."

"I'm learning that the hard way" Blair sighed.

"I wish you would tell me what this big secret is" Serena said. "I told you my biggest secret. Whatever this is about it can't be worse than killing someone."

"It's a lot more complicated than the Pete thing" Blair said. "I just… I need to tell someone else everything before I can tell you. "

"I don't follow."

"I will tell you everything S, I promise. When the time is right."

"Blair did I do something?" Serena asked. "Because as far as I can tell I was the one with a reason to be mad at you, not the other way around. Why is it that you have been the one keeping secrets from me?"

"The secret is not just mine" Blair said.

"Is this all about Dan?" Serena asked, less friendly now.

"What? No."

Serena looked skeptical but said nothing further on the subject. Blair finished her lunch and wished things wouldn't feel so awkward. She had missed Serena terribly over the years but she had known she couldn't tell Serena without having told Chuck. He deserved to know first.

"I wonder where Chuck plans on taking us tonight" Blair mused, just to make conversation. "Does he still own the Empire?"

"I doubt the Empire is where we're going" Serena said.

Neither of them said anything else. Blair found herself wishing Serena would leave. She'd rather be by herself right now than with someone whose presence made her feel guilty. Luckily Serena didn't stay for long after they had finished eating and Blair was left alone to wonder some more about Chuck's relationship and whether or not it was serious.

* * *

><p>Chuck texted everyone an address shortly after six and they all met up at seven. The location turned out to be a nightclub, the kind where you could hear the music out in the street. Exactly the kind of place they had all thought was really cool when they were in their early teens and now thought were loud and obnoxious.<p>

"Why are we meeting here?" Dan wondered. "Wouldn't it make more sense to rally someplace where we could carry out a conversation? Or did you just want a drink?"

"If sitting around plotting was the goal tonight then meeting at Blair's penthouse would make the most sense" Chuck pointed out with a small smile. "This field trip is for other purposes. Come on, let's go inside."

"You could have warned me we were going to a noisy hellhole" Blair complained. "I wish I had brought earplugs."

"Mea culpa" Chuck said merrily. "I had not realized you now frown upon the things you used to enjoy a mere eight years ago."

"Eight years is a long time."

He walked up to the bouncer who gave him a nod and without a word let the five of them walk right in, ahead of the dozens of people standing in line. Once inside the music was deafening and the sight of lightly clad twenty-one year-olds annoyed Blair. This didn't seem very productive. Chuck had better have a good reason to bring them here. To make matters worse the song that was playing when they entered was "_White Light Moment_". By now Blair was convinced the person who had called Chuck earlier in the day was his girlfriend and hearing the song Chuck had as a ring tune when she called put her in a spectacularly bad mood.

"You really know how to pick them" she shouted to Chuck over the music. "The DJ at this place is as outdated as your phone."

He just smiled and made his way through the crowds, counting on the others to follow him. Nate leaned closer to Blair and shouted in her ear.

"It's his girlfriend's favorite song! Try not to insult it!"

The confirmation that the song was tied to the woman Blair had seen on the picture made her wish that they were heading for the bar where she could find something suitably strong to drink. Preferably a whole bottle. Since she left New York four years ago she had barely touched alcohol except for a glass of wine now and then but right now getting herself drunk seemed like a very pleasing way to spend the evening compared to being sober and aware that Chuck had a girlfriend, and one with lousy taste in music to boot.

Chuck did indeed stop at the corner of the bar and waited for the others to catch up. He put his arm up on the bar and leaned casually against it.

"See that pretty blonde bartender behind me?" he said loudly, hoping the others could hear him over the music.

"What about her?" Blair asked sullenly.

"She's moonlighting."

"What's her day job?" Dan asked.

"It so happens that she's an intern by day at the very same online magazine where our buddy Malcolm works."

"How did you figure that out?"

"I have my ways."

"Do you think she knows anything if she's just an intern?" Serena asked with a frown.

"She might know more than she's aware" Dan said.

"Exactly" Chuck nodded. "If nothing else we can always have some other use of her. Insight to Malcolm's schedule, how the chain of command works, perhaps even get access to his computer or calendar or something along those lines."

"So what is the plan?" Dan asked. "We just walk up to her, order drinks and casually ask her all about the magazine and its employees?"

"_We_ don't do much of anything" Chuck said. "Nathaniel! Put those baby blues to work."

Nate walked past them and up to the part of the bar where the blonde bartender was serving a young woman a cosmopolitan. Dan frowned.

"Great. I see you've finally corrupted Nate" he said to Chuck over the noise of the music.

"What, are you kidding?" Chuck scoffed. "None of Nate's current conduct is my doing or by my encouragement. It's all natural talent."

"He's really going to get information out of her by flirting?" Serena asked, looking displeased. "That's your brilliant plan?"

"I never said I had a brilliant plan" Chuck countered and turned his head to order a scotch from a male bartender. "I never even said I had a plan."

"What's the problem S?" Blair asked. "So long as we get information out of her does it really matter much how we get it? If Nate wraps her around his little finger then things will just be that much easier for us."

"We get a source of information…" Chuck said, taking a sip from his scotch. "Nate gets to scratch his itches… Win-win."

"Yeah, except for the girl" Dan pointed out. "What does she get out of it?"

"Well if she doesn't approve of Nate's bedroom tricks then she can just dump him" Chuck shrugged. "Perhaps they can just be friends? Ladies, care for something to drink?"

"Get me something with a lot of alcohol in it" Serena sighed, clearly not in a good mood.

"I think I'll pass" Blair said. In spite of her strong urge to drown her sorrows she decided it would be wiser to stay sober and clear-headed.

Chuck handed his scotch over to Serena and ordered a new one for himself. Serena took the tumbler and gulped down a large sip. She leaned against the bar and glanced over at Nate who had already won the bartender's attention.

"How long do you figure this will take?" Blair asked.

"Patience Waldorf" Chuck said. "He can't very well start prying right away. First he'll have to take her home."

"I seriously object to this" Dan said. "How is it okay to use that girl this way?"

"All is fair in love and war" Chuck shrugged.

"If he's not going to get any information out of her right now then do we all really need to be standing here?" Serena asked. "Won't our time be better spent planning step two?"

"We have nine days, sis" Chuck said. "No need to rush. Let's hold off until morning and see what Nate can find out."

"So… We all just gathered here to watch Nate pick up some blonde?" Blair said. "Couldn't the two of you have handled that alone?"

"I'm growing a bit tired of this negativity" Chuck said, his previous smile gone.

"Sorry, but I hate places that play music this loud" Blair griped.

"Fine, we'll get out of here then."

He walked past her into the crowd. She noticed how people seemed to be parting automatically to make way for him. He had an authority about him, something he hadn't had when he was younger, at least not this strong. She found it very attractive and in the back of her mind she wondered if Sebastian would have that quality when he was grown.

"Come on B" Serena said, eager to leave.

Blair cast a glance back at Nate who now had the bartender laughing at something he had said. She then followed Serena and Chuck, feeling Dan's hand on her back as they made their way through the crowd with a little more difficulty than Chuck had had.

"So now what?" Serena asked once they were all outside.

"We go home, get some sleep, see each other tomorrow?" Dan suggested.

"I'm hungry" Serena said.

"Dave is bringing the limo around" Chuck said. "You can come along with me and I'll have him stop by the restaurant of your choice."

"Wow" Serena said. "You're not hurrying home?"

"Nobody's home at either one of my homes" Chuck said with a slight smile and stuck his hands in his pockets. "I've got time to spare and I could go for something to eat."

"Count me out" Dan said. "I should try to get some work done before tomorrow."

"No one ever counted you in" Chuck said.

"B you wanna come?" Serena asked.

"She really should get some rest" Dan said.

"I asked B" Serena said testily.

Blair wasn't all that hungry. Going straight home sounded like a decent option but she wasn't sure what she would do at home all alone. She couldn't talk to her baby on the phone since Italy was six hours ahead of New York. Perhaps she should go home with Dan and watch a movie. She glanced from Serena to Dan to Chuck, who was looking at her with interest. She made up her mind. Coming along for something to eat meant spending some more time in Chuck's company and even though that hurt a bit at present it was a little like being closer to Sebastian.

"Something to eat would be nice" she said. She gave Dan a pat on the shoulder. "See you tomorrow Humphrey."

The limo drove up and Chuck opened the door. The girls got in and he shot Dan a look that made it clear he was not being offered a ride home before getting in after the women and closing the door. Dan watched them drive off and frowned, worried that things might get out of hand real soon. How long would Blair be able to keep her secret if she spent more time with Chuck than absolutely necessary?

* * *

><p>They got a table at a quiet restaurant. Serena ordered a drink and a salad, a combination which didn't seem too smart in Blair's opinion. Blair settled for just the salad, leaving the drink no matter how much she felt she needed it. Chuck refrained from commenting on their light meals and ordered a steak even though he said he had eaten dinner just two hours before.<p>

"I ate some Chinese take-out at my desk" he said. "Basically just stomach-filler. I need some proteins."

"Suit yourself for skipping lunch" Blair teased and felt a bit better when he smiled warmly at her.

The meal turned out to be just as awkward as lunch had been. Serena was in a foul mood and said very little, gulping down her drink and insisting on ordering another one even though she was getting tipsy. The minute her salad was finished she was out of her seat and over by the bar, flirting wildly with a cute guy in a cheap suit. Blair watched with eyebrows raised and turned to Chuck who was calmly eating his dinner as if there was nothing wrong in the world.

"Is this… typical of her these days?" Blair asked.

"Which part? Eating light, drinking heavy or flirting wildly?"

"The last two. I thought she was all grown up and serious nowadays."

"She gets this way every now and again" Chuck shrugged, leaning back in his chair with his wine glass in his hand. "Some things never change. Not sure what set it off tonight."

Blair looked over at Serena who had her hand on the cute guy's arm, laughing at something he said. It was downright depressing having grown this far apart from her. Whatever it was that bothered Serena tonight Blair was probably one of the last people she would confide in. She sighed and looked down at her salad, absentmindedly stirring her untouched glass of water with a toothpick.

"You okay?" Chuck asked.

"Yeah…" Blair lied. "I wish I didn't feel so distant from S. A lot seems to have changed while I've been gone."

"Why did you stay away?"

She looked up at met his eyes. He was now looking at her with a combination of curiosity and irritation. She nearly recoiled when he leaned back over the table and took another bite of his dinner. His eyes were still on her, waiting for an answer.

"I couldn't come back here after the engagement ended" Blair said evasively. "I was just so embarrassed and I was worried I would be stalked by paparazzi and my picture would be everywhere along with headlines mocking me for not ending up with Prince Charming. It would be too humiliating."

"Makes sense" Chuck said.

"And… I don't know. I wasn't sure how long I should stay away and then it seemed like there wasn't much tying me back to New York. I no longer had college, I no longer…" She trailed off. She had no longer had Chuck but she couldn't say that. "Somehow I just ended up staying longer than I had planned and the longer I was away the harder it seemed to come back."

Chuck nodded slightly and finished his dinner, neatly arranging his knife and fork on the plate before washing the last bite down with a sip of wine.

"Things _have_ changed" he said. "Question is, will you stick around to catch up?"

"What do you mean?"

"Once we've averted your crisis will you be getting on a plane and once again turning our fearsome foursome into a trio?"

She smiled slightly.

"Once I get everything here sorted out I have every confidence that I will be sticking around" she said.

He nodded thoughtfully.

"You know, I've been wondering how come you haven't stayed in touch with me or Nate or Serena but you've been best pals with Dan Humphrey of all people. Why would anyone subject themselves to his company for any stretch of time if it's not necessary?"

"Be careful Bass" Blair warned. "You have no idea what he's done for me. He's been a good friend. I don't take kindly to people badmouthing my friends."

"Alright then. Forget I said anything." He emptied his glass and sat it down on the table. "Better get started on all that catching up with the rest of us if you're going to stick around."

He smiled and Blair wanted to believe that he was smiling because he was happy to hear she was staying. Little did he know that not only would she stay in New York; she would bring their son over to America and introduce him to his father. Blair was not the only one who had a lot of catching up to do.

* * *

><p>Serena ended up leaving with the guy she had been flirting with. Chuck offered Blair a ride home and they sat together in the back of his limo, both looking straight ahead at first, feeling a touch awkward. Neither one of them could help thinking about their most memorable limo ride together. After a few minutes Chuck turned his head briefly towards her before looking straight ahead again. She turned to look at him seconds later. This was repeated twice before they both started to chuckle.<p>

"Some things never change, do they?" Blair said. "What is it now, ten years with the same limo? I think you're supposed to trade them in after just a year or two and get a newer, cooler model."

"I like this one" Chuck said simply.

Feeling nervous Blair started digging through her purse, hoping to find a lipstick, her phone, anything she could occupy herself with. She was in dire need of distraction. Sitting so close to him, just the two of him in his limo, made her feel things she definitely shouldn't. Not when he had a girlfriend. She wished with all her heart that said girlfriend wasn't real, that it was something Chuck had conjured up in order to see if she would be jealous. She wanted him, badly. Not just for herself but for her son. Sebastian deserved to have a real family and Blair had been denying him one for far too long.

"Blair" Chuck said softly.

"What?" Blair said shortly, looking up at him.

"We're here."

She looked surprised. Then she realized that the limo had stopped.

"Oh…"

In a rather ungraceful fashion she fumbled to find the door handle. Once her hand was on it she paused and looked at Chuck again. He had a slight smile on his lips and was looking at her in a way she enjoyed. She wanted to stay for just another moment and pretend that there was no girlfriend. She was completely unprepared when the driver opened the door from the outside and as a result she nearly fell out the door. Luckily she was able to find balance before she embarrassed herself and she hoped Chuck hadn't noticed. She thanked him for the ride home and stepped out of the car.

"Hey Waldorf!" he called after her.

She stopped and turned. He had scooted closer to the door and was leaning forward so they could see each other better. She expected him to say something along the lines of "_see you tomorrow_" but he said something else.

"God, how I've missed you."

The comment was so unexpected it made her jaw drop. He had barely gotten the words out before the driver slammed the door shut and lifted his cap to Blair before heading back to the driver's seat. She stood there for a few seconds, too surprised to walk inside even though it had started to rain and she was getting cold. Then a smile spread across her face and for the first time since that morning she felt good. She walked inside, wishing she could call Sebastian but he was asleep and besides, she couldn't gush to her son about what his father had just said.

In the back of the limo Chuck sank back against the leather seats and closed his eyes. He hadn't intended on saying what he had said; it had just slipped out. He couldn't take the words back and he knew he didn't really want to. Unfortunately, having said them could make things complicated.

He reached over and picked up a handkerchief that had fallen from her purse when she was rummaging through it. He let his fingers play with it, finding it a touch endearing that she had had it embodied with an S. Clearly she hadn't forgotten her best friend even though she hadn't contacted her much.

He lifted the handkerchief to his nose and breathed in deeply. It smelled of her. One of his favorite scents. He smiled to himself and for the moment forgot all about the fact that he was on his way to his girlfriend. When that thought hit he told the driver to take him to the place he shared with Nate instead. He balled up the handkerchief and put it in his pocket. Blair might not need it back right away. He could hold on to it for a little while.

* * *

><p>So that was chapter three.<p>

Now… There are a few things I would like to say regarding reviews.

Reviews don't need to be positive. I love getting positive feedback but I don't expect people to like everything I write, or every aspect of a story they enjoy. What should not be included in reviews are negative comments towards other reviewers. I've said before that unsigned reviews will be removed if they are bashing towards other reviewers, or towards me or the story. For the time being I have disabled anonymous reviews alltogether.

That being said, the vast majority of reviewers are both kind and respectful whether they are giving positive feedback or not. I really appreciate you guys and you are more helpful to me than you know. Thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts!

Thanks for reading this chapter! I'm going on a mini-vacation now so I don't know when I will be updating next. Hopefully before September but we'll see.


	4. Chapter 4

Time for another update. I hope it doesn't seem too boring and slow-moving with the whole blackmail plot. I'm working on figuring out ways to make it span several days without there being too much padding =)

I know I haven't given you all that much insight to what Blair really thinks of her not having told Chuck about their son. A deeper look into that will follow but not in this chapter since I've found a scene in a later chapter where I think it works better. For now she's a bit in denial I guess =)

Anyway on to the chapter!

* * *

><p>After taking a shower and eating breakfast Blair gave her mother a call. She had been putting this off for the past two days but it needed to be done. When Eleanor and Cyrus had taken Sebastian for a holiday and Blair had gone to New York the plan had been for all of them to be back at the chateau after four days. There was no way Blair could leave the city until everything was sorted out so the plan needed to be altered. She dreaded having to ask her mother to either stay in Italy with Sebastian for a few days more or ask her father to take care of him until she got back. While her parents loved their grandchild they weren't so keen on extended babysitting.<p>

What she dreaded the most right now being apart from him for up to ten days. They had never been apart for more than five days in the past and those five days had seemed like five months. Going twice that long without seeing him felt intolerable.

While Blair was on the phone the others gathered outside her building, all managing to arrive at the same time. Chuck and a quite tired Nate stepped out of the limo just as a tired and hung-over Serena slammed a cab door shut and Dan came walking down the street. Nobody commented on how they all arrived at the exact same time. The doorman held open the door and Chuck walked in first, followed by Nate, Dan and Serena.

"I'm on the edge of my seat to find out if your brilliant plan last night worked" Dan said sarcastically.

"So we've got one who's barely slept, one who's hung-over and one Humphrey" Chuck summarized. "What a Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah day."

"And a stressed-out Blair" Dan added. "I think we should try and think of ways to distract her. You know, something to help her unwind. It doesn't have to be anything really special, just anything that will get her to relax and think of something else for a while."

"Well I know of one sure-fire way to get Blair Waldorf to unwind" Chuck said as Nate pressed the button to call for the elevator. "But if I do it Emmy might object. If Nate does it the bartender girl might object. If Serena does it then it might get weird. And if you do it Humphrey she'll probably end up more tightly strung than she is now."

"Chuck gross" Serena complained as they stepped on the elevator.

"Do you ever think of anything but sex?" Dan wondered.

"Fun as that sounds as a method of getting her to relax," Chuck said while pressing the button to Blair's floor, "that's not what I was talking about. A nice, sensual massage always did wonders on her. She'd go from a high-strung lioness to a kitten curled up and purring."

"Adorable" Serena said, looking slightly nauseous. "Okay so should we just… I don't know, take turns finding ways to distract her?"

"You know what, never mind" Dan said quickly.

He was beginning to realize that if he took it upon himself to keep her distracted he would have a legitimate reason to spend a lot of time alone with her. Not only would that work out well for him since he enjoyed every moment he spent with her, it would probably be beneficial to Blair if they spent time alone since when she was with him she could talk about her son as much as she wanted to.

"No, I think it sounds like a good idea" Nate said. "We could try something new each night and see if we can get her to unwind a bit."

"Guys, really, I think-" Dan began.

"Who goes first?" Serena asked.

She, Nate and Chuck each raised a fist and extended their index fingers, then let the hands drop, pointing at someone else. Nate and Chuck both pointed at Serena, who pointed at Chuck. She sighed.

"You always gang up on me" she complained.

"Look at it this way, you'll have your turn done by the end of the day while we still have ours looming" Nate said.

"Yeah but I have zero time to think of anything" Serena said, stepping off the elevator. "B? We're here."

"She doesn't seem to be down here" Dan noted.

Chuck's phone rang and he stepped into the kitchen to take the call. Nate slumped on the couch with an exhausted groan and closed his eyes. Serena, who was still wearing sunglasses, curled up in an armchair and looked miserable. Dan motioned towards the stairs and mumbled that he would go see where Blair was.

He found her by her dresser, in a morose mood. Eleanor had not been pleased when she heard Blair wasn't coming back when she was expected to but had at least agreed to look after her grandson for a few days more. Then Blair had talked to Sebastian and the sound of his little voice had made her miss him even more than before. She had been in tears through most of their brief conversation, trying her best not to let him hear that she was crying. They had hung up a few minutes ago and right now she was working on trying to cover her puffy eyes with makeup. She looked up when Dan entered, slightly startled. Then she sighed and relaxed.

"Oh, it's just you."

"The others are downstairs" Dan said. "Are you okay?"

"Never better" Blair said sullenly, tossing a rouge brush on the vanity.

"Did, did something happen?"

"Something worse than a semi-journalist threatening to expose my biggest secret and make my boy's life a living hell unless I pay him three million dollars?" Blair said, annoyed with the question.

"You can tell me."

Blair ignored him and got up. She decided she didn't care if they could tell she had been crying. She could blame it on the stress of her situation. She stomped past Dan and headed down the stairs, arriving just in time to overhear the end of Chuck's phone conversation.

"… will probably stop by tonight. Yeah. Yeah, I know… I missed you too. I know, I was thinking the same thing. Yeah… I don't know how long we will be at this today. Thank you Emmy. You're really great about this. I know. Text me later. I'll call you as soon as I can. Yeah, you too. Bye."

Blair's mouth went dry again and she stopped on the second-to-last step. Chuck walked back out from the kitchen and nodded to her. Blair followed him with her eyes and fought the urge to turn around and go back upstairs to throw herself down on her bed and sulk. Since they had parted ways the night before she had been in a great mood, convincing herself more and more each hour that Chuck wasn't really serious about his new woman and that his heart still lay with her. Judging by what she had just overheard she was wrong. He had called the woman Emmy, which was the same name Nate had said back when Blair was pregnant. If he was still with the same person it had to be serious. He had said he would stop by her tonight and that he missed her, presumably he had said "_you too_" in response to three words with a total of eight letters. She didn't want it to be true but she had no right to expect it to be different.

She felt Dan give her a nudge and she took the remaining steps down to the black and white floor and walked over to a chair to take a seat.

"Is everyone in a bad mood today?" Chuck asked, looking from Serena to Blair to Nate with a frown.

"I'm not" Dan said.

"You don't count" Chuck said. "Remind me of why you're here again?"

"Nate" Blair said. "Any luck last night?"

"Define 'luck'" Chuck smirked, taking a seat on the divan, ignoring Serena's scoff.

"Her name is June" Nate said. "She's been an intern at the magazine for little over a month and seems very excited about it. I was worried how I would breach the subject but all I had to do was ask her if bartending is her full-time job and she got really talkative."

"Did she mention Malcolm?" Blair asked.

"She did. She doesn't like him."

"Why?" Chuck wanted to know.

"Didn't say. She did mention in passing that he never has lunch with the others. He always goes out to eat alone or heads home."

"Could be interesting, could be trivial" Chuck said.

"Superb analysis Sherlock" Blair said grumpily.

"So Nate's little escapade was a waste of time" Serena yawned.

"Not exactly" Chuck said. "We know he's not popular around the workplace and we know he leaves the office at lunch every day. Who says he actually goes to eat? Nathaniel! Take Scrappy-Do with you and go shadow the guy. It's getting near lunchtime. You can go to the offices and trace him when he leaves."

"Come on Dan, let's go" Nate said, getting up.

"Wait, what?" Dan said. "Why am I going, exactly?"

"Because Nathaniel didn't get a good night's rest" Chuck said. "You did. You'll be able to poke Nate when he nods off."

"I'm sorry, but who made you captain of this mission?" Dan asked, annoyed with getting ordered around.

"I did" Blair said. "Chuck can out-scheme the rest of you with one brain lobe tied behind his back. Now do as he says."

Dan looked displeased but obediently got up and followed Nate to the elevator. Blair walked over and grabbed Serena's sunglasses, promoting her to moan.

"It's too bright in here!"

"I cannot believe you got yourself drunk last night" Blair scolded in the same tone she used when she chastised Sebastian. "A lot is at stake here and you show up hung-over."

"Ladies, please" Chuck said. "We have work to do, now let's get to it."

"You guys work" Serena moped, pulling her feet up underneath her. "I won't be much help right now."

"Serena van der Woodsen you will pull yourself together even if I have to drive you to a hospital and hook you up to a banana bag" Blair said, sitting down on the couch.

"Fine" Serena groaned.

"Focus please" Chuck said, opening the laptop sitting on the coffee table. "What we need to do is run background check on Malcolm. Where's he from? Where did he go to school? What are his past relationships? Time to start mapping this guy out."

"Good thing I had Dorota pick up some laptops" Blair said and rose to get them from the next room.

"She had Dorota pick up some laptops" Serena echoed. "She's nothing if not practical."

"Now then" Blair said, returning with two small laptops in carry-cases. "Chuck you're on a computer already. Serena, take one and get to work. I'll be looking into his academic history in the hopes of being able to scoff at his puny education."

"I'll see what I can find about his past relationships and family background" Chuck said. "If we're in luck he's got a bitter ex-wife we could get some info out of. Or an ex male lover."

Serena mumbled something about getting a drink of water and left for the kitchen. Blair fished out a pair of reading glasses from her purse without giving it much thought and opened her computer. After clicking on her web browser she looked up, feeling Chuck's eyes on her. He was studying her with interest and she blushed, realizing he had never seen her with glasses before. She felt embarrassed but there wasn't much to do about it now. She might as well continue to wear them. In case he commented she could always say that reading glasses were all the rage right now in Paris.

* * *

><p>She kept her glasses on until later that afternoon when she leaned back on the couch, in dire need of resting her eyes.<p>

"Aside from the fact that my eyes are hurting and the fact that I want this scum to die a humiliating death it's actually nice to get to sink my teeth into a good scheme again" she commented, leaning forward to reach for a glass of lemonade on the table.

"This isn't scheming, this is college work but with no chance of a good grade" Serena mumbled, still nursing her hangover.

"It's not that straining is it?" Blair questioned.

"There's a reason why I prefer to have PIs do the background stuff" Chuck commented, clicking on a new link. "Gathering information is not the fun part. Crafting a plan and executing it, now _that_ is fun."

"I made a list of people Malcolm went to school with" Blair said, setting the glass down. "His college roommate, freshman girlfriend, a couple of his professors, people he hung out with… One or more of them has got to have some dirt on the guy."

"When are we supposed to have time to talk to all these people?" Serena complained.

"Fine, Chuck's hungry hounds can handle some of it" Blair said. "So long as they stay in the periphery."

"I found some more info on his wife" Chuck reported. "I was hoping for an ex-wife but this will do too. They're separated and have been for the past two years. She's filed for a divorce and is demanding alimony and child support."

"Ew, he has spawn?" Blair said, wrinkling her nose.

"Then he would probably need more money, but three million?" Serena said.

"We should pay Mrs. Malcolm a visit. Find out why they split. Before we do anything else though, how about dinner? I had lunch at ten-thirty, I'm starved."

"What's with you and eating these days?" Blair wondered, raising an eyebrow and eyeing his waistline. "You're not getting chubby, are you? I know those suits can hide a couple of extra pounds."

"So salads, then?" Chuck sighed. His phone rang, a standard ring tune this time, and he checked to see who was calling. "It's Nate. If they're on their way back I'm telling them to bring food. I'm in the mood for something South American."

He got up from his seat and took the call. Serena made a face and leaned back from her computer.

"South American… You know, for a man who drinks like a fish he knows nothing about hangover food. Or he's trying to torture me."

"Drinks like a fish?" Blair echoed with a touch of worry, looking up at Serena. "Is he having… problems?"

"Come on Blair, you know Chuck. A drink per day is hardly out of the ordinary."

"Yeah but he only gets drunk when he's depressed."

She looked over at him. He had walked towards the kitchen and was discussing something with Nate. It wasn't exactly true that he only got drunk when he was feeling down. When they were teens he had loved to go out and party and got drunk to about the same extent as the rest of them. After high school though he had only partied on rare occasions and she had wondered if the decline in frequency was due to him maturing or due to him being happy in their relationship and partying had been a way of taking his mind off things that hurt.

She didn't realize that she was staring at him until he turned around and met her gaze, causing him to lose track in the middle of something he was saying. Blair quickly put her glasses back on and revised the list of college associates she had compiled. Chuck found his thoughts again and returned to his conversation. After a few minutes he hung up and came back to sit on the divan.

"They're on their way back" he said. "I'll let Nate fill you in when he gets here. As for now, I think we've accomplished about as much background work as we can in one afternoon. I need a break."

"No!" Blair said. "This creep probably doesn't take breaks and neither can we."

"We know he takes lunch breaks" Chuck pointed out dryly, leaning back with his hands clasped behind his head, putting his feet up on the divan.

"This person is an evil, loathsome creep and we've wasted enough valuable time already" Blair said angrily. "I am not stopping until we find some insight to what his diabolical scheme is really about."

"I know you're frustrated by this person and I know he's an ass but diabolical is pushing it, don't you think?" Serena said.

"As far as I'm concerned he is pure evil" Blair said. "The two of you should be more concerned. This could all just be a small part of some grander plan that will strike all of us!"

"I strongly doubt he's somewhere twirling his moustache, cackling evilly and petting a Persian" Chuck said. "I agree that the blackmailing must be part of some larger picture but I don't think it will be the end of the world as we know it."

"You have no idea how bad things could get if we aren't able to stop him" Blair said, on the verge of tears thinking about her son becoming a media scandal.

Chuck studied her closely. She glanced at him and saw something in his eyes she couldn't quite put her finger to.

"This other person who shares this secret…" he said. "That person really matters to you, don't they?"

"More than anyone else" Blair said truthfully, part of her not minding if he thought she had a new love and got jealous.

He didn't say anything for almost a full minute. Then he sat back up and reached for the computer mouse.

"Then we shouldn't waste any time, should we?" he said.

She looked at him and he looked up from his computer screen to meet her eyes. She wondered if she would be willing to put this much work into protecting a secret for someone she had never met only because that person meant the world to Chuck. If the person was his girlfriend then she wasn't so sure she would be able to, at least not if she had to be constantly aware of how much that person meant to him. He had always been better at being happy for her when she was with others than she had been regarding him. Maybe that was because deep down he didn't feel like he deserved her while she had so such qualms regarding him. If Chuck was self-loathing, Blair was entitled.

After a few seconds Chuck broke eye-contact and returned to the task at hand. Blair did the same and made no further comments. Together with Serena they worked in silence until the elevator rang and Nate and Dan returned.

"Captain Calories can come get his meal" Dan said, holding up a large bag of food boxes.

"Did you find anything out?" Blair asked eagerly, putting her glasses aside.

"Did you get anything that isn't going to turn my stomach?" Serena asked.

"We bring both updates and food" Nate said, walking to the kitchen. "If you want either then you'll have to follow."

Blair practically jumped up from her seat and hurried after him and Dan. Chuck rose and walked over to Serena, extending his hand to her and pulling her up to her feet.

"Seriously what did you drink last night?" he asked. "You just had three drinks when we were with you. You should be able to handle that. I haven't seen you this sullen since you saw some other woman carrying the same Louis Vuitton bag as you at the Met."

"I'm not sixteen anymore Chuck" Serena pointed out. "And... the guy… had tequila at his apartment."

"The guy?" he echoed with a smirk. "Pray tell, what was his name?"

Serena gave him an annoyed look and smacked him on the arm.

"You don't get to judge me" she said haughtily even though she knew he wouldn't.

"Who said anything about judging?" Chuck smirked. "Endlessly teasing you on the other hand…"

She gave him another smack but chuckled a little. They walked into the kitchen where Blair was eyeing the food with a frown as Nate lifted it up from the bags and Dan tried to figure out where they kept their cutlery.

"Doesn't this look appetizing?" Blair remarked with no enthusiasm.

"I think I'll pass on dinner" Serena said.

Nate fished out a chicken salad from one of the bags and handed it to her with a smile. She smiled back at him and thanked him in a sweeter voice than anyone had heard her use so far that day.

"Okay now I want to hear everything" Blair said as soon as everyone was seated and had dinner in front of them. "Did you find the creep?"

"Yeah, we managed to get there right when he was heading out to lunch" Dan said.

"And?"

"And he… went to have lunch" Nate said. "We followed him to the restaurant, he sat alone at a table by the window, nothing interesting went on."

"Not until after he was done with lunch" Dan continued. "He walked to the restaurant but when he was leaving he got picked up by a limo. We weren't able to follow them but he didn't return for like forty-five minutes. No wonder no one likes him at the workplace if he takes two hour lunch breaks."

"If he worked for me he would be fired" Chuck commented.

"So that's it?" Blair asked. "He had lunch alone, went for a ride in a limo and then got back to work? Why on earth were you guys gone for so long?"

"While he was away I decided to go pay June a little visit" Nate said. "You know, say I was in the neighborhood, hadn't been able to stop thinking about her since this morning, you know the drill."

"If she bought that you were just in the neighborhood she's too dumb for us to have any use of her" Serena said sullenly while chewing on a piece of lettuce.

"She didn't buy it" Nate said. "She thought it was incredibly charming that I had gone out of my way to stop by."

"Cute" Serena said without enthusiasm.

"She gave me a tour of the office" Nate said. "She's really happy to be working there. Apparently as far as gossip magazines go this is the crème de la crème."

"Spot anything of interest?" Chuck wanted to know.

"Like what?"

Blair groaned.

"Like maybe you saw his desk and spotted some details that could give us insight to his personality or his hobbies or his family?"

"I… didn't ask which desk was his."

"You're such a spy rookie" Blair frowned.

"I wouldn't say that" Dan objected. "We stuck around at a café across the street from their office building and saw the limo drop Malcolm off. This time we managed to find a cab and follow the limo. I felt completely ridiculous doing it and honestly it amounted to nothing because we ended up lost in traffic after only fifteen minutes-"

"Rookie mistake" Chuck said.

"Well okay, so what about you guys?" Nate asked. "Did you find anything out?"

"We've got ourselves an impressive to-do list for tomorrow" Chuck said.

"Tomorrow?" Blair echoed. "Yesterday I allowed events to be postponed but no more of that. It's only like six o'clock. We have hours left of the day and none can be squandered."

"Blair you need to relax a little" Dan said. "You know, take your mind off things. There's only so much we can do in one day."

"We haven't reached the quota yet for today" Blair argued.

"Okay Blair, enough" Serena said. "We could all use some unwinding; it's been a really long day. No more plotting tonight."

"She's right Blair" Nate said. "We've gotten a lot of stuff done today and tomorrow we will do more. Tonight we're doing something else."

"Like what?" Blair snarled. "Having a Wii tennis tournament? No thank you."

"I actually have a plan for tonight" Serena said, sounding more upbeat than she had all day. "Now finish your dinner and we can start to get ready for it."

Blair looked skeptical but she didn't want to give a discouraging response now that Serena finally seemed to be in a good mood.

"I trust no objections then?" Serena said with a smile.

"As long as it's not paintball…" Chuck said.

"It's neither paintball nor laser-tag" Serena promised. "I think you'll like it."

"In that case it's something that involves alcohol" Chuck concluded. "Fine by me."

"Yeah, so long as it's not going to result in another Jacuzzi incident" Nate said.

Chuck and Serena both laughed and Serena gave him a playful nudge.

"You were not so innocent in that whole thing, may I remind you?" she said.

"Not so innocent?" Chuck echoed. "Try the most guilty party."

"I was not!" Nate objected with a laugh. "That was totally you!"

Blair's eyes went from one of them to the next, then down at her dinner which she was halfheartedly pushing around with her fork. It stung that they had a Jacuzzi incident which had apparently been a lot of fun and Blair had not been there for it. She didn't know the first thing about it. She was out of the loop and even though she knew the reason why it still didn't seem fair. She hadn't chosen to stay away, it had seemed like the only option available to her.

"I still can't believe Emmy was the one who actually got us thrown out of that place" Nate chuckled. "She seems so well-mannered."

"She's a spitfire, believe me" Chuck grinned.

"Excuse me for a second" Blair said, abruptly rising from her chair and walking out of the room. She heard someone's cutlery clutter as they were tossed on the table but she didn't care to check who it was that followed her.

She paused for half a second when she came out to the sitting room, unsure where she should go. She wanted to go up to her bedroom but that might seem a bit weird. It would be less suspicious if she went to the bathroom or something. Then she decided to hell with it and hurried up the stairs. She needed a moment to collect herself, a moment away from the others. She hated Chuck and Nate and Serena in this moment. Hated them for talking about fun memories that didn't include her, hated them for talking about fun memories that included _Emmy_.

"Blair" Dan's voice said behind her once she was inside her room.

She turned to look at him. He looked concerned and that was strangely soothing.

"What just happened?" he asked. "Are you alright?"

"Fine" she automatically lied. Then she realized it made no sense to lie to him about that and shook her head. "I just… I needed a minute. That talk about the Jacuzzi it… it reminded me of how Sebastian and I always sit in the Jacuzzi when we visit Mom and Cyrus' country house." She wasn't sure why she didn't tell him what was really bothering her but for some reason it felt like she couldn't talk about it. "I really miss my little boy" she added, feeling herself tremble a little. It was true, she missed Sebastian like crazy.

"I know" Dan said softly. "You'll see him soon. I promise."

She nodded and walked over to him, hugging him for comfort and support. It hurt more than she was prepared for to hear about all the fun endeavors Serena and Chuck and Nate had been up to without her these past years. It hurt even worse to be reminded of Chuck's girlfriend and most of all it hurt to think that maybe she had begun to take Blair's place. Not only in Chuck's heart but in Nate and Serena's eyes. Maybe they were still a foursome only now Blair was no longer a member of the club and Emmy was?

"We should probably get back down there" Dan said after a minute. "You don't want them to start to wonder."

Blair nodded and pulled back from the hug.

"You're right" she said. "Thank you."

"My pleasure" he said with a little smile.

Blair took a deep breath and slowly let it out before walking out of her room and heading downstairs, Dan following close behind. When she walked back into the kitchen three pairs of eyes looked up at her with confusion and mild concern.

"Is everything alright B?" Serena asked, glancing over at Dan for a second.

"Yeah" Blair said. "Everything is fine. I just remembered I had to call my dad about something."

She sat back down and took one look at her abandoned dinner before deciding she wasn't going to eat it. It hadn't been all that exciting while warm and certainly didn't seem appetizing when it was cold.

"Back to what I was saying," Serena said and turned to Nate with a good-natured smile, "I'm sorry but I just don't see you in politics. You're too nice. People like you just end up getting run over."

"Hey there's a tiger beneath this kitten exterior" Nate said jokingly, prompting the other four to moan. "I'm just saying, I can be tough when I want to be. Besides you're in no position to mock my career choices, miss professional party planner. You're going to live off of that for the rest of your life?"

"Well maybe I can plan your inaugural ball when you've been elected president" Serena said and rested her chin in her palm with a giggle.

"God help us all if Archibald ever takes that office" Chuck said with a hint of a smirk.

"Hey I would make an awesome president" Nate grinned.

"What about you, Dan?" Serena asked, turning to look at him. "When can I plan the release party for your next book?"

"That… That is a topic better left untouched" Dan said and laughed a little. "Let's just say everything that went down when the first one was published, not to mention the whole circus around the movie, has made me reluctant to rush into any new releases. But rest assured, some day you will get to plan that release party."

"What about you Blair?" Serena asked. "What are your plans for the future?"

"They… are pretty undefined" Blair said evasively. "All I can say for certain is I won't be staying in France and when I do return to New York I will make my mark in the career field of my choice. By the time I retire I plan on being the most powerful woman on Manhattan. One way or another." She picked up her glass of water and took a sip, smiling mischievously. "I like to keep my dreams simple. What about you Chuck?"

She added the question in what she hoped was a casual way. She was curious to find out if buying and managing hotels was the entirety of his plans for the future or if he was planning on expanding, but she didn't want her interest to be too obvious.

"My goals for the future are fairly simple" he answered good-naturedly. "Rise to the top of the business world, make enough money that my father's riches will look puny, become an old man who scares people off and says: '_Bah, humbug_'! You know, the usual."

"Doesn't that sound like a healthy plan for the future?" Dan said sarcastically, raising an eyebrow at Blair.

"Okay, enough talking" Serena said. "I don't think anyone is going to eat anything else so let's get out of here."

"Where are we going?" Nate asked.

"You'll see. We're off to unwind."

* * *

><p>A few minutes later they were all standing out on the street trying to hail cabs. Chuck griped about wanting to take the limo but Serena insisted that they leave right away and not wait for his car to be brought around. Chuck ignored her and placed a call to his driver just as Serena got a cab to pull over.<p>

"You go ahead and take a cab" he said. "Text me the address. I'll follow in the limo. Blair if I know you you'd rather take a limo than a cab. You're welcome to join me."

"I'll go with Serena" Nate said and walked to the cab. He opened the door for her and while she got in he turned to Dan. "You coming?"

"You know I'll just… I think I'll just wait here and… ride with Blair and Chuck."

"That won't be necessary" Chuck said.

"Regardless I think I'd prefer that option."

Nate looked puzzled but got inside the cab and closed the door. Chuck looked annoyed but said nothing. Blair glanced from him to Dan and back again and wondered just how awkward this ride was going to be.

Inside the cab Serena glanced over at Nate.

"Is Dan in love with Blair?" she asked.

Nate frowned.

"What?"

"Is he?"

"What do you care?" Nate asked with a frown.

"Why shouldn't I care?" Serena countered. "He was my first love and she is my best friend. Besides, I don't seem to have any other current prospects now do I?"

The last part was said rather icily. Nate made a face and ran his fingers over his chin, stroking the beard.

"Dan has been spending far more time with Blair than with anyone else since he got here" Serena continued. "He is the only one Blair stayed in close contact with while she was away. Whenever she leaves the room he goes to follow. Am I totally crazy for thinking something's going on here? They kissed before she got engaged to Louis. I'm not totally paranoid."

"Well if he is in love with her he probably wouldn't tell _me_" Nate pointed out. "Chuck is my best friend."

"Chuck is with Emmy now."

"Still, Blair was _his_ first love and he and Dan really hate each other. If it comes down to it I'll probably be, you know… team Chuck."

"Chuck is team Emmy" Serena said shortly.

"Question is, will he be if Blair becomes an option again?"

"Stop avoiding the issue" Serena said. "Do you think there's something going on between Dan and Blair?"

"What the hell does it matter to you?" Nate said angrily.

She raised an eyebrow at him. He shot her an angry glare and turned to look out the window instead of at her. Serena demonstratively turned to look out the other window, trying to ignore him. Figures Nate wouldn't understand. He had given his blessing to his best friend dating his first love. Serena couldn't be quite so generous even though she was well aware that she herself had dated Blair's first love. At least by the time Serena and Nate had been actually dating Blair had been head over heels in love with someone else and in a happy relationship. Serena was single and her love life a mess. The thought of Dan being with her best friend made her feel deeply betrayed and very sad. She couldn't be angry at Blair given their history but she had expected more from Dan. There were millions of women out there. He didn't have to set his sights on her best friend. She was beginning to join Chuck in feeling it would be better if Dan wasn't involved in this scheme.

* * *

><p>Serena took them to a newly opened club with a cinematic theme. Movie posters were up on the walls, there was an inner room with old seats from movie theatres instead of chairs or sofas by the tables and every song that played had been featured in a movie. In Serena's opinion the movie theme was fun for about an hour and then got old but when she had read about it opening her mind had gone to Blair and as she had predicted Blair loved it. After expressing to Serena how much she liked the theme she immediately got a table in the inner room for the five of them and ordered them each a drink named after a movie star or iconic character. Nate complained when she ordered a Mister Pink for him and a Batman for Chuck while Serena felt the need to comment that she had ordered an Oscar for herself.<p>

At first they just sat there mostly in silence, sipping on their drinks. It was still too early for the place to be crowded and the music was playing at a very low volume. Without enough to distract her Blair's mind went back to Malcolm.

"So about tomorrow, I was thinking…" she began.

"Objection" Serena said. "We're not here to discuss that, we're here to take your mind off of it. Tomorrow will come soon enough anyway."

"Overruled" Chuck said, looking at Blair. "You're not going to be able to relax and enjoy yourself until you've planned our day tomorrow, are you?"

"Thank you Chuck" Blair said, shooting Serena a glare. "Today we did the first phase of snooping up dark secret from Malcolm's past. Tomorrow we need to go deeper."

"We should talk to his wife" Chuck said.

"And find out where he lives" Nate added.

"Plus we should follow him again at lunch" Chuck said. "Maybe he'll go for another limo ride. If so we should find out where to. Odds are whoever's behind all this is the person with said limo, unless our friend likes to multitask and blackmail several people at once. Is there anything else you'd like us to do tomorrow Blair?"

"Probably, but I'll come up with what later" she said.

"I have to ask though Blair how long do you suppose all of this will take?" Serena said. "Don't get me wrong, I'll see this through with you if it takes until we're thirty but some sort of timetable would help."

"Malcolm gave her ten days" Dan reminded her. "That means we have seven days left."

After a while the place began to fill up with people and the music was turned up louder. Nate asked Serena to come dance with him and Blair headed for the ladies' room, leaving Chuck and Dan alone together. Neither one of them said a word at first but Dan found he couldn't stand the uncomfortable silence. Looking over at Chuck he felt bad for a moment. The guy on the other side of the table had a child and he had no idea about it. It was so not in keeping with Dan's moral code to keep something like that secret from someone. But the thought was easily shrugged. Sebastian was better off without Chuck in his life. Chuck hurt the people who cared about him and, worse, he hurt the people he cared about. Dan did not even want to think what Chuck could do to that poor boy with or without bad intentions. Besides, Sebastian was probably not Chuck's only child. A guy like that must have sired half a dozen kids by his many conquests. What difference would one more make?

Chuck noticed Dan's eyes on him and gestured towards himself.

"See something you like?" he asked dryly.

"About what you said before, at dinner" Dan said. "There was a time when I actually thought you might turn out to be different from your father."

"You don't know anything about my father."

"I've come to see that you are just like him. Is there anything you _really_ care about besides investments and profit? I used to think you loved Blair but you traded her for the Empire. Which did not teach you any lesson apparently."

"This is a capitalistic country" Chuck said. "I enjoy being in the business world. As do many others. That hardly makes me a bad person."

"No what makes you a shady character is the fact that you don't mind who you have to step on in order to turn a profit" Dan said. "You're building your career and your fortune by trampling on others, with absolutely no regard to who gets hurt along the way."

"Interesting how so many of your morality lectures are just a pot calling the kettle black" Chuck replied. "That little book of yours? Not exactly an original story, was it? You didn't actually _write_ as much as you _documented_. All your characters were based on real people who never got a say in whether or not they had their privacy exposed and exploited for mindless entertainment. Almost everything that happened in the book were things that had happened in real life, only with your skewed sense of right and wrong portraying it. You wouldn't have an ounce of fame or fortune if it weren't for me and my friends and I don't recall you ever asking for our permission." He leaned forward over the table and gave Dan a look which would have had most people running. "By the way I find it funny that Charlie Trout, the fantastically clever name you used to disguise my identity, is by far the most popular male character in that book. Not exactly what you had in mind when you wrote it, was it?"

Before Dan could gather his thoughts enough to answer Chuck had gotten up, shot him another look and walked off towards the bar with his drink in hand. He had only taken a few sips from it and didn't need a refill quite yet but he was quite sure he would go crazy if he had to be around Humphrey for another minute. He walked over to Nate and Serena who were laughing together over something by the bar.

"Would anybody really mind if we bound Humphrey, gagged him, put him in a trunk and shipped it to Hong Kong?" he asked, only half in jest.

"Chuck…" Nate said.

Serena and Nate returned to their conversation while Chuck was content just standing next to them having some form of excuse not to return to their table. His eyes found Blair coming out from the ladies' room. He smiled at her automatically and she returned the smile.

Blair wasn't sure why everyone but Dan was congregating by the bar and not at their table and was about to go over and ask when she changed her mind. "_The World Is Not Enough_" by Garbage had just begun to play and even though it was perhaps silly that song had in a weird way reminded her of herself and Chuck for years. Chuck was still looking at her with a smile and she felt a strong urge to do more than just sit or stand next to him. She decided to test the waters. He might have a girlfriend but that didn't necessarily mean he no longer saw Blair as his great love. After all he had gotten together with Emmy shortly after Blair had left for Monaco to get married. Though she knew it was dangerous she could not stop herself from hoping that Emmy was his fallback option and not his first choice.

She stopped right in front of him and extended her hand with an inviting smile.

"Dance with me Bass?" she said. "Old times' sake?"

He knew he should decline the offer. He had Emmy. Blair was dangerous. She could be out of his life again in seven days. Physical and emotional distance was the only way to avoid more pain over her.

He set his drink down and took her hand, feeling the familiar shot of electricity at the touch. Hand in hand they walked to the dance floor. Then she was in his arms again, not as close as when they danced as boyfriend and girlfriend but perhaps a touch closer than they had danced when they were just friends and she was with Nate. Her arm rested around his neck, his hand was on the small of her back.

They had not been this close in a very long time. Not since the night Sebastian was conceived. That night she had been the one with someone else as her significant other, tonight it was Chuck. Blair had chosen Chuck that night but he had sent her back to Louis. If he chose her tonight over his girlfriend Blair would not repeat his mistake. It was so clear to her that he didn't belong with anyone else. He belonged with her and with their child.

It felt so good to have his arm around her again and draw in the smell of him. He didn't use the same cologne now as when he was twenty but she found she liked this one better. It was more adult.

Sighing contently she closed her eyes and moved closer, letting her cheek rest against his.

* * *

><p>Granted I don't have a clue what Dan's book will really be like but hey, this is my story and it will be the way I want it to be ;)<p>

The next update probably won't be that far away. Thanks for reading and please review!


	5. Chapter 5

This chapter is pretty much an in-betweener. Not much plot development, more a look into some of the character issues.

* * *

><p>Sighing contently she closed her eyes and moved closer, letting her cheek rest against his. Gently but firmly he pulled her back a bit. Taken aback she looked into his eyes and realized he was about to say or do something to put an end to the moment.<p>

"Remember that time when we were twelve and wanted to go to the opera?" she blurted out. "'_Aida_' was playing. I had wanted to see it for a while but my parents never liked it so they didn't want to take me and they thought I was too young to go by myself."

"I see how theme songs from action flicks would make you think Verdi" Chuck said, now with a relaxed, or perhaps relieved, smile on his face.

"You wanted to see it too but Bart didn't think you could behave yourself for long enough to sit through an entire opera" Blair continued. Her right hand had been holding his, now she released it from his grasp and wrapped her arm around his neck in a more intimate touch. "Nate wanted to play video games and Serena wanted to party, only you and me seemed interested in the show." She had almost been holding her breath waiting to see if he would protest to her hand placement and she was thrilled when his now free hand wrapped around her waist. "You and me decided to go see it even though our parents had said no so you came and picked me up in your limo one Friday night and we snuck in together."

"I remember."

"Afterward we went and got frozen yogurt and felt like we were so adult" she continued with a chuckle.

"Me in a suit and you in a floor-length dress. We must have looked like we were playing dress-up or something."

"Neither Bart nor my mom noticed that we snuck back in like three hours past our curfews but Dad wasn't too happy about it."

"I haven't seen '_Aida_', or even listened to it in… God knows how long" Chuck said.

Blair smiled softly at him. She was vaguely aware that "_The World Is Not Enough_" was no longer playing and some other movie song she didn't recognize had started up instead. They should have stopped dancing but so long as he wanted to continue she would continue.

"I suppose twelve year-olds today aren't even aware that '_Aida_' is an opera" she said just to keep talking. "They probably only know about the musical. Kids today have absolutely no sense of culture."

Chuck laughed and looked away in a gesture that was so much Sebastian it almost took Blair's breath away. They said that mannerisms and behavior were a result of upbringing and surroundings but some parts of it had to be genetic for Sebastian and Chuck were far more alike in some of the faces and gestures they made for it to be anything but. Blair could not wait for the two of them to finally meet.

Chuck's eyes met hers again. He was just as drawn to her as she was to him, she could feel it with every fiber in her body. The way he looked at her, the way he held her, the way he seemed to be struggling to catch his breath. They were in sync, connected. Years apart had not been able to change that.

Her left hand left its place around his neck and gently caressed his cheek while her right hand played with the hair at his neck. She moved a little bit closer, succumbing to the strong need to kiss him. She wondered if he still tasted the same, still kissed the same.

He stopped her before she could get too close. His hands left her waist after nudging her away and he harked and looked away.

"This is not appropriate" he said.

She frowned, disappointment welling up inside her.

"Since when does Chuck Bass care about appropriate?" she asked.

"_Gossip Girl_ may not be around anymore but that doesn't mean someone can't snap a picture of us and send it to…" He stopped dancing altogether and Blair slowly let her hands fall to her side. "I have a girlfriend" he said.

"So that means you can't dance with old friends?" she asked testily, deliberately getting him wrong.

"Blair" he said, giving her a look.

She took half a step back from him, feeling both rejected and insulted but she knew she didn't have the right to feel either way. He was someone else's boyfriend and he hadn't made any moves on her. All the same she wanted to say something hurtful and spiteful to him, wanted to make him feel rejected too, but she couldn't bring herself to do so.

"I need to get some air" she said as coolly as possible. "The stress of everything is… is making me think weird. I'm not, I'm not acting like myself. You're right, this whole dancing thing was a terrible idea."

She felt his eyes on her as she walked away from him, heading for the exit to get some fresh air. She hoped it didn't seem to him like she was running off because her feelings had been hurt. He was far too good at reading her.

Chuck sighed heavily as she disappeared into the crowd. She was dangerous indeed. He knew that if anyone had taken a picture and it ended up somewhere Emmy could see it his girlfriend would not be too pleased. She was not the jealous type but he knew he had held Blair and looked at Blair in a way you really oughtn't to when you were with someone else.

He walked to the bar to get himself another drink. When the bartender placed the tumbler in front of him Dan Humphrey came walking up with his trademark disapproving face.

"Have you seen Blair?" he asked, and Chuck knew it was not a real question so he didn't bother to answer.

"You're really wearing out your welcome" he said instead.

"That's for Blair to decide. I feel really bad for your girlfriend; I don't think she'd be too happy if she had seen the way you just looked at your ex."

Chuck glared at him, not surprised that he had been watching them but slightly surprised he hadn't interrupted them.

"You're so sweet to care about my love life" he said dryly.

"I don't know your girlfriend but I have to believe she deserves better than the guy she's with blurring the lines with his ex."

"The lines are not blurry at all" Chuck said. "Can I now expect you to run and tattle to my girlfriend? You seem to enjoy telling people why they should stay away from me."

"I've been around you long enough to know that you're no Prince Charming" Dan said. "The stuff you've done to Blair is pretty messed up."

"Stuff you never seemed to care about while it happened" Chuck remarked. "You know, did it ever occur to you even for a moment that perhaps you don't have all the answers about me? That perhaps you don't even know me a little bit?"

"Oh what, there's a tortured soul underneath your cool exterior?" Dan scoffed. "I don't think that makes the things you do okay. News flash, we all have issues and stuff we're dealing with beneath the surface. That doesn't give us a right to treat other people however we want to."

"You think you know everything about me" Chuck said. "You think you have me all figured out. I read your stupid book, you know that, I came this close to suing you over the damn thing. The way you wrote me shows how little insight you actually have."

"Charlie Trout was a character in a book" Dan replied. "Though frankly I think he was probably a better person than you are."

"Blair, Emmy, Nate, Serena, they have all lived with me" Chuck said. "Blair and Emmy have had a relationship with me. You really think you know me better than the people who have shared their lives with me? _They_ see the real me. You never have and you damn sure never will because I don't open myself up to people of your ilk."

"People like what? People with morals?"

"I've been trying to figure it out…" Chuck said. "Why you suddenly started to hate me more than you seem to have before. Why you're so upset whenever Blair and I are close. Why you follow her around, why you watch her and me dance. You're jealous. You're threatened."

"By you?" Dan scoffed. "I don't want to be anything like you."

"You want to matter to her the way I matter."

Dan opened his mouth to protest but decided it was no use. He probably hadn't been very discreet about his feelings and what difference did it really make if Chuck knew? He wasn't a rival no matter what he said.

"I care about her" he said. "Much more than I think you ever have. I used to think you loved her but then you traded her for the Empire and I realized the only person you'll ever love is Chuck Bass."'

"This would be entertaining if it wasn't so annoying" Chuck said. "I was only guessing but now I know. You have feelings for Blair. Here I thought Serena was your main squeeze."

"That was a long time ago."

"I don't think my sister views it the same way. First loves matter to people like her. Somehow I doubt that she will take kindly to you going after Blair and without Serena's blessing you haven't got a shot with Blair Waldorf."

"I care about Serena. So much. The thing is though we were teenagers when we dated. You know?"

"I was a teenager when I fell in love with Blair" Chuck replied. "That talk about how teens don't know what actual love is? I'll grant you it's probably a lot different and more hormone driven when you're sixteen compared to when you're twenty-six. That doesn't mean the feelings aren't genuine or strong. You were in love with my sister."

"I think Serena and me weren't in love so much as we were in lust" Dan mused, not really meaning it but eager to have him move on from the subject.

"I think you and lust don't exist in the same dimension" Chuck said dryly. "Hate to break it to you Humphrey but you don't exactly ooze raw lust or passion. I should know. I had probably done more with other guys when I was sixteen than you had with women when you were twenty."

"That's, that's… disturbing."

"Are you really serious about having feelings for Blair?"

"What does it matter to you what I feel for her?" Dan said. "You're in a relationship which means you have no claims at all on Blair."

"If nothing else it bothers me if you decide to pursue Blair without any regard for her friendship with Serena or for the way Serena feels and has felt about you."

"Serena and Blair have barely spoken in over three years" Dan pointed out. "If their friendship ends for good it won't be because of me. I care about Blair. I care _deeply_ about Blair. The last thing I want to do is cause her pain."

"I wonder what it is that's been keeping you from gallantly declaring to her that she is indeed the Buttercup to your Wesley."

"Her life is complicated right now" Dan said. "We live on different continents."

"You don't think she likes you back" Chuck concluded.

Dan shook his head. He wanted to tell Chuck he was wrong but decided not to. If Chuck wanted to believe that and it made him leave the subject alone then Dan was fine with it. There were a few reasons why Dan had yet to say anything to Blair and since at least one of them was tied to Sebastian and her current insistence that he should know his biological father before having other father figures introduced into his life, Dan didn't want Chuck to go digging any deeper into the subject.

He said nothing else to Chuck, ordered another drink and returned to their booth. If Blair had not gotten back within ten minutes he would go look for her and make sure she was okay.

* * *

><p>Blair didn't go outside. She stopped in the entryway by the coat closet and closed her eyes hard, leaning back against the wall. She wasn't sure what to feel and she wasn't sure who to blame for her conflict. She was both terribly disappointed at how the dance had ended and really happy to have gotten to dance with him at all. The romantic tension between them, the heat and electricity, was something she knew she would never find with anyone else. But he wasn't hers and every reminder that there was another woman in the picture hurt like hell. The very fact that he had moved on and started a relationship with someone new was deeply hurtful which made her feel like a hypocrite since she had moved on before Chuck. Who was she to feel betrayed by him when she had gotten engaged to Louis months before he met this Emmy person? The feeling of being replaced was awful but she couldn't hold his choice against him nor could she see it as disproving his feelings for her. She had gone so far as to agree to marry someone else while she still loved Chuck with every bone in her body.<p>

She just wanted, needed, to know if he really was serious about Emmy or if she stood a shot. She knew he was still attracted, still had some lingering feelings, but that didn't mean he would want to leave the woman he had been with for four years. What did Blair know of the plans he had made with this person? He may have decided he wanted a simpler love just as Blair had once done and unlike Blair he might have stuck to that choice rather than realize settling would never make him truly happy.

She took a deep breath and slowly let the air out of her lungs. She had to go back in there and pretend like everything was normal. She wished she could just go home but it was not an option under current circumstances.

When she walked back inside the club she saw Chuck by the bar. Maybe she ought to just tell him how she felt and see what would happen. Could she expect him to walk away from his girlfriend just like that? Probably not. He must already know how she felt and he was still with Emmy. The decent thing to do was to flat out tell him about Sebastian and lay all her secrets out there and make it clear to him that what she wanted most of all in the world was to build a family together with him and their son. Then let him decide what he wanted to do. If only she didn't feel so strongly about him. She couldn't handle the thought of telling him everything and not getting to be with him.

* * *

><p>Chuck walked slowly inside the apartment he shared with Emmy and closed the door behind him. It was late and he was tired. With a sigh he pulled his bowtie off and shrugged out of his jacket, letting it lie where it fell. Emmy could gripe about it in the morning. He didn't really care.<p>

He wasn't even sure how they had ended up living together, which was really what they were doing even though he still got his mail delivered at the apartment he had bought with Nate. It had just happened naturally on its own. He had started spending more and more nights at her place. Nate had fallen head over heels for a girl in his political science class and after three months moved in with her, at which point Chuck had decided to simply vacate the Empire penthouse altogether and stay with Emmy. Nate's relationship had only lasted another six months but he and Chuck had both agreed that moving back to the Empire seemed like a step backwards. They had found a large apartment close to the Met and bought it together but Nate lived there mostly on his own. Chuck stayed there alone three or four nights a month and stayed there with Emmy a handful of times. Most nights were spent in the cozy three bedroom apartment he had gotten her for her birthday two years ago.

Chuck moved slowly through the apartment, heading for the bedroom. He felt like he had put his life on pause a bit over the last few years. This was all nice but it wasn't really who he aimed to be or the kind of life he aimed to lead. The apartment was still mostly Emmy's, probably due to the fact that in spite of his wealth Chuck didn't own a lot of stuff and what little he did own was mostly at his place with Nate. When he spent money in stores it was usually on clothes or electronics. Knickknacks and books and movies and the like were things he rarely bought and he could care less what couch they had or what color the tablecloth was. Emmy enjoyed interior decorating so he left all of that up to her.

He felt emotionally spent, pushing the door to their bedroom open. The room was dark and he could see Emmy's sleeping figure, the comforter slowly rising and falling with her steady breaths. He cared deeply about her and she had done wonders for him. Saved him in fact. If he couldn't have Blair he wouldn't mind having Emmy instead. If there had never been a Blair Waldorf in the world Chuck Bass could probably be very happy with Emmy Banks for the rest of his life. But there was a Blair Waldorf and she was back in his world again.

He pushed the thoughts of Blair from his mind. She was a pipedream and always had been. Far too good for him and representing a love that was far too strong for the two of them to be able to wrap their minds around. They weren't safe together. Emmy was safe.

He got up on the bed carefully and lay down next to her, wrapping an arm around her. She didn't wake up. He moved her hair away, slightly annoyed that it always seemed to end up in his face. He was grateful to her. He only wished she knew how grateful. He wondered if gratitude would be enough when he knew he could never love her the same way he had loved Blair.

He had met Emmy at a Sotheby's auction in October 2011. He had been there to bid on a painting, the original of the one that had been Bart's favorite. While he normally didn't give a damn about paintings he had seen that it was up for auction and felt an urge to get it in his father's memory. Emmy had been there as well, furiously bidding against him. She had ultimately lost but thanks to her he had had to pay far more than he had intended to at first. She had come up to him after the auction and tried to persuade him to sell the painting to her. He was stunned by her request and impressed at her go-get-it attitude. She looked like the epitome of mild but she clearly wouldn't give up easily when she wanted something. The very idea of being out-bid and then trying to convince the buyer to sell you the painting at the same price he had paid was evident of a fighter spirit. Emmy had told him later that she had been hoping he was regretting having paid so much for the painting and thus would be willing to sell.

He had thought she was a wealthy young woman, being able to pay that much money for a painting. In fact she was there bidding on the behalf of her movie-star client. Impressed by her spirit and pleased with her looks Chuck had smirked and told her they could discuss the painting over drinks. She was the first thing or person that had intrigued him in quite some time. The past couple of months he had been walking around in a haze, wanting little more than to self-destruct but not wanting to give his haters the satisfaction of being weak and blatantly hurting himself or committing suicide. The conundrum of this mild-looking woman coming with the request to buy the painting from him caught his interest and he felt like enjoying it.

Nothing much had happened while they had their drinks. Chuck hadn't sold her the painting and he hadn't had the slightest thought to hitting on her, nor had she made any advances towards him. She was all business and it entertained him. She seemed like an oxymoron with her mild face, soft voice and gentle mannerisms and her business suit, the bun her hair was made up in and her determination to have the painting. But she hadn't interested him on a level of physical attraction. He hadn't really noticed her brown hair, her green eyes or her delicate features. She had seemed more like a child playing dress-up than anything else.

A week later she had walked up to him in the Empire lobby and handed him her card. She had done some research on him and decided that he was probably the kind of person who could have use for someone going around at auctions collecting great art for him. He had insisted that he had just wanted the one painting but she had suggested that perhaps the Empire needed some new artwork. Her persistence had impressed him but he was adamant that he didn't require her services. He had been surprised when she had softened and said: "_Please_". She had told him that the movie star she had been representing at the auction was a friend of her cousin and she had been at the auction as a favor. She wanted to be able to make some form of living off the concept but she needed a prestigious client to get herself started.

He couldn't help but be impressed with her drive even though he thought she was in way over her head. He had taken her to lunch to discuss the matter and contemplated hiring her to find some new artwork for the hotel but in the end he wasn't interested in throwing money at something he didn't find necessary. Nor was he interested in making anyone his pet project. Either this woman could make it on her own in her chosen field or she should find something else to do. Charity was hardly beneficial in cases like these.

After lunch they had walked together through the park. She had moved on from talking about her business ideas and was now telling him the story of when she went to her first auction at age eight. The story should have been tedious to him but for some reason he found himself hoping she could continue talking. For the first time since May he had been able to take his mind off his pain for a while without even realizing it. She distracted him. He needed distraction. He studied her on the sly while she talked and found that he liked what he saw. Not just the physical appearance but the way she moved and expressed herself. It was an odd combination of softness and passion. He got the feeling that she was a very mild-tempered person who rarely raised her voice yet when cornered or provoked she could be deadly. He liked that combination. It reminded him of Blair and her cool exterior hiding her fiery passion. The thought of Blair made him cringe and longing for more distraction he blurted out an invitation to dinner in the middle of Emmy's story.

Dinner had ended chastely. They hadn't even kissed until the end of their third date. For once Chuck didn't mind taking it slow. By now sex no longer worked for him as a method of easing pain so he didn't need to jump into bed with her right away to distract his aching heart. The slow build-up seemed to make things interesting as it was something completely new to him. While he did find that building anticipation for the first kiss made that kiss fail to live up to expectation there was still an element of fun and interest to it all. He enjoyed not knowing how far they would go on each occasion. He let her take the lead and let her distract him from the headlines about the American girl and her upcoming wedding to the prince of Monaco.

He wasn't even sure when they had ended up being an actual couple. It had happened so slowly and gradually that there didn't seem to be a precise moment or even precise day they could call their anniversary if things lasted. He didn't know if they would last or even if he wanted them to. He wasn't madly in love with her. He enjoyed her company and he was attracted to her and by and by his affection for her grew. But he doubted it would ever be the all-consuming love he had experienced in the past. Still that was the whole beauty of it. Clearly all-consuming wasn't the key to happiness and at their last meeting him and Blair had agreed that they needed to find simpler loves.

It was in many ways a strange spring. Though he tried not to think about it he remembered his honeymoon period with Blair and how he had been happy beyond words. With Emmy he wasn't experiencing anything nearly as strong but he wasn't miserable and that alone was a giant step up from where he had been only a few months ago. He didn't spend hours daydreaming about her the way he had done over Blair and while he thought about her during his day it wasn't all the time like it had been with Blair. It didn't really bother him so long as she seemed content. He had made no promises to her and a few weeks in he had told her that he had been in a previous relationship that had been perhaps too consuming.

On the day Blair gave birth to their son Chuck was with Emmy at an impromptu romantic getaway. He had taken her to a small bed and breakfast because he knew she liked them and in the evening he gave her an expensive pearl bracelet as a token of thanks. Slowly but steadily Emmy Banks began to work her way into his life and heart and make her little changes. She scoffed at his expensive pajamas and at his habit of wearing them every night even if they had sex after going to bed. In turn he teased her over her complete inability to make a bed. He enjoyed learning more about her and the more he learned the more he realized that apart from a few characteristics she really wasn't much like Blair Waldorf at all. She liked to dress in dress-suits, pencil skirts and blouses but it didn't matter much to her if it was a high-priced designer or not. She put on her makeup perfectly when she was going out to work or going to a fancy dinner but when she was at home she preferred not wearing makeup at all. She had a mild exterior and a fiery core but unlike Blair who was mostly fire and the coolness was more of an exterior Emmy was mild-mannered most of the time and only erupted in very rare cases.

Over the next few years he enjoyed slowly getting to know her and her little quirks. She had a passion for "_Monkey Island_" which completely baffled him. She still used the same phone she had had when they met, refusing to get an iPhone or anything else with a touch screen since she prefer the older models. She used different ring tunes for different people and after six months of dating she had grabbed Chuck's phone and, after spending nearly fifteen minutes trying to figure out how to get it to do what she wanted it to do, she had set his ring tune to "_White Light Moment_" whenever she called. He had protested that he hated all ring tunes but the standard ones but she had insisted. He had gotten notoriously difficult to get a hold of by phone and she hoped that if he knew it was her calling he would answer it faster.

Chuck glanced at the alarm clock on her nightstand. Past midnight. Emmy made a small sound and moved a little in her sleep. He placed a kiss on her cheek, feeling guilty over how badly he had desired to kiss Blair only hours ago, and carefully got up from the bed to change into sleepwear and brush his teeth. When he got back out he crawled under the covers, turned off the light on his nightstand and decided not to align his body to hers. He knew he was a bad person for it but when he closed his eyes he could still feel Blair in his embrace and he wanted to hold on to that, at least for the night.

* * *

><p>So this chapter you got to meet Emmy… sort of. Next time you'll get to meet Sebastian… sort of.<p>

Reviews are love =) Thanks for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

I'm now done outlining the rest of the story and it will be ten chapters in total. There will be a sequel fic to follow but I'll elaborate on that when we reach the end of this story. I'm not going to give away which chapter Chuck finds out the truth but I can assure you that he'll know about Sebastian before this fic is over.

With that said, here's the next chapter.

* * *

><p>"Chuck…" a soft voice purred in his ear. "Wake up baby."<p>

Slowly he became more awake, hazily aware that someone was kissing him on the cheek and that hair was brushing against him. He felt the bed shift and slowly opened his eyes, squinting in the morning light. He looked over his shoulder and saw Emmy walking towards the dresser, her long, thick, brown hair like a cape behind her.

"Em?" he mumbled. "What… What time is it?"

"Just past eight" Emmy said in her trademark mild voice and picked up a tray sitting on the dresser. "I have to leave for work soon but I thought we could share breakfast in bed. I've barely seen you at all in days."

"We've both been busy."

"Too busy" Emmy said, carefully climbing up on the bed with the tray in her hands.

Chuck grabbed the tray from her and sat it down next to him. He glanced at the breakfast she had prepared. Scrambled eggs, bagels with cream cheese and pancakes dripping in maple syrup. He had gained weight with her and though he tried to keep himself in shape through squash and the occasional game of basketball he didn't have the time to exercise enough to compensate for her cooking. How she remained a size eight was a mystery to him.

"Eat" she ordered with a smile, lifting a pancake over to a small platter. "Shit, I forgot the whipped cream."

"Allow my arteries to express their sincere gratitude."

She giggled, mouthful of pancake muffling the sound, and playfully smacked him with her tiny fork. He decided to go for a bagel and realized he wasn't very hungry.

"How's everything going?" Emmy asked, sitting cross-legged in front of him. "Are you figuring out your friend's problem?"

"We're still in phase one" Chuck said. "It's a little more… complex than our usual takedowns. It would be so much easier if she could just tell us what it's all really about."

"Sounds secretive" Emmy noted, licking maple syrup off her fork.

"She's entitled to her secrets" Chuck said. "But it does hinder us a touch."

Emmy shrugged.

"It seems to me that if you ask for help from people you haven't seen for years you're not entitled to _that_ many secrets. You and Nate and Serena deserve to know what you're getting yourselves into."

"I respect her right to her privacy" Chuck said. "She's a founding member of the group and we'll help her regardless. Honestly… on a personal level… I'm not sure I even want to know what the secret is."

Her comment the other day about how the person she shared the secret with meant the world to her made him a touch defensive. She was in her full right to have whatever relationships she wanted to but that didn't mean he wanted to know about it. Just like he tried to keep his relationship out of her face.

"I'm sure you guys will figure it all out" Emmy said, putting the platter down and crawling over to him. She smiled and straddled him. "Anyone who poses a threat to those LeChuck protects had better run for cover, am I right?"

"Oh I can be ruthless" Chuck replied with a smirk, wrapping his arms around her.

"Pity the person foolish enough to go after one of your friends."

"Pity indeed."

She pressed her lips against his and he could taste the maple syrup. She pulled back for a second and then kissed him again, this time letting her tongue slip inside his mouth. He knew what this meant. They only French kissed as foreplay and whenever one of them kissed the other that way it was a signal between them. He pulled back from her, a touch uncomfortable though he wasn't quite sure why.

"I thought you had to leave for work."

"I'll call them and tell them I got stuck in traffic."

She kissed him again and the thought of turning her down only passed fleetingly through his mind. They hadn't seen much of each other these past few days and he felt guilty over the connection he still shared with Blair. Emmy deserved better than to be brushed aside. He loved her and he wanted her to feel it, especially now when his mind kept going back to his ex even more often than it had in the past few years.

They kissed again and he felt her hair fall all around him. Thanks to her he had begun to view hair flowing loose as really sexy. She only wore hers loose to bed. In the mornings she always put her long hair up in either a bun or a braid. They mostly had sex after going to bed which had made her freely flowing hair a very erotic sight to him.

He rolled them over so that he was the one on top. Her legs wrapped around his waist and he made his way from her mouth to her jaw line and down her neck, kissing and nibbling as he went. He felt really bad for how much he had wanted Blair last night and tried not to think about his ex-girlfriend right now. Emmy deserved better. She loved him and she deserved to have all of the man she loved, not just a small part.

* * *

><p>The sound of her phone ringing woke Blair. For a moment she wasn't sure what was making noise or how she was supposed to respond to it, then her head became clearer and she realized she was awake and her phone was both ringing and buzzing on her nightstand. Groggily she reached out her hand to answer it.<p>

It was her mother calling. Blair yawned while Eleanor scolded her for having still been asleep. Blair wondered if her mother had forgotten that New York was behind Italy but then she glanced at the clock on the nightstand and saw that it was well past nine. Eleanor handed the phone to Sebastian and Blair was torn between being happy to hear his voice and being sad that she couldn't be with him.

"Mama?" Sebastian said in a sad voice. "When are you coming home?"

Blair sat up on the bed and felt herself starting to tear up.

"Real soon baby. As soon as I can. I just have to take care of something in New York first, okay?"

"Can't you come home first?"

"No… No sweetie I can't. I need to finish this thing first."

"I want Mama" Sebastian said, beginning to cry.

"Sweetie…" Blair tried to soothe him while wiping away her own tears. "Sweetie don't cry. I'll be back before you know it, okay?"

Nothing she said seemed to have an effect. Sebastian cried and she cried and after a few minutes Eleanor took the phone and told Blair in no uncertain terms to get back to France as soon as she possibly could.

When the conversation was over Blair stayed on her bed, crying with guilt and frustration. Hearing her baby plead her to come back to him and knowing she couldn't yet made her feel absolutely horrible. Not that she wasn't used to feeling like the worst mother of all time. Every night when she tucked her child in she felt the absence of the other parent who ought to be there and sometimes she wondered if her son would be able to forgive her for keeping his father from him. She could live with never having Chuck's forgiveness if she had to but she couldn't live without Sebastian's.

Her phone rang again and she made an effort to stop sobbing and control her voice. Hopefully it was Dan calling or she would probably have to make up some lie about why she was crying at nine-thirty in the morning.

"Hello?" she answered the phone.

"Good morning Miss Waldorf" Malcolm's voice said on the other end.

Blair froze, her heart pounding in her chest at the sound of his voice. An overreaction, sure, but in her emotional state his voice was the last one she wanted to hear. And she was afraid of what he might have to say.

"I'm just calling to check on how things are going with our little… agreement."

"I still have six days" Blair said.

"Unless I change my mind."

"What good would it do you to change your mind? If you want the money you have to give me time to-"

"You could have the money for me this afternoon if you needed it" he said calmly. "You could always resort to your old tricks and perform… services… for Mr. Bass in exchange for three million dollars. That is if you're worth that much."

Blair's jaw dropped and she quickly went from sad and worried to furious.

"Excuse me!" she said. "Leave my former boyfriends, and the sexlife I had with them, out of this. If you're going to be crude then-"

"Then what?" Malcolm asked and cackled. "I'm the one who calls the shots here. Actually there was one more thing."

"Oh?" Blair snarled. "And what might that be?"

"You wouldn't happen to know anything about two guys following me to lunch and then hanging out outside my office building yesterday, would you?"

"Oh so now you've got a stalker?" Blair said testily.

"Just checking."

"I don't have time to talk to you" Blair said, tossing the comforter aside and getting out of bed. "Unless you're a complete and utter retard you're well aware that I have no desire to speak with you at all if I can avoid it."

"You should make the time" Malcolm replied. "Frankly your secret is not as well kept as you think it is. Under other circumstances I would care less if your goons found everything out but as things are now I don't want them to figure everything out and take away my leverage. So I'm cautioning you. If I have any reason to suspect anyone else is on to this whole thing I will go public right away. Damn your three million."

He hung up and Blair stared at the phone for a few seconds, wondering what on earth he was going on about now. None of this made any sense to her. If the secret was that easily uncovered then why was he blackmailing her over it in the first place?

Then she felt a shot of fear. What had he meant exactly by her secret not being so well kept? Sebastian was an American citizen through her. Was there a copy of his birth certificate lying around somewhere? Were there other pieces of evidence to his existence that were better kept hidden for now?

She raced to her closet to get dressed. She was starting to panic a little and wanted to get to the bottom of this right away. She needed to make sure her tracks were covered and she and the others needed to come up with a plan really fast. They couldn't count on having six additional days. They would have to find some leverage and find it very fast.

* * *

><p>Chuck walked into the kitchen and put the tray away on the counter. He grabbed his phone from the pocket of his robe and plugged it in the charger. Emmy was in the shower. He ought to take a shower as well but they had agreed to shower separately. She was in a hurry and he didn't really feel up for any shower adventures.<p>

There was a knock on the door. He walked out into the hallway and cursed as he nearly tripped over his briefcase. When he opened the door he was surprised to find Blair there.

"We have a problem" she said, stomping inside without waiting for an invitation.

"Good morning to you too" Chuck said, slightly taken aback.

"Focus. We have a problem."

"How… How did you know where to find me?"

"I didn't know what your address was so I texted Nate."

He closed the door behind him and wondered how soon he could get Blair out of there. He did not look forward to she and Emmy coming face to face and Emmy was bound to be out of the shower any minute. Blair on her end hadn't yet realized that Nate had given her the address to Emmy's apartment and not the one Chuck and Nate shared and was too preoccupied with her situation to notice that the apartment was hardly the home of two wealthy twenty-something guys.

"Look, Blair," Chuck said, "this really isn't-"

"Why are you still in your robe?" Blair questioned. "It's past ten in the morning." Without waiting for an answer she began to pace back and forth. "I'm really freaking out right now and I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do."

"Calm down" Chuck said soothingly. "Why don't you go wait in the lobby while I get dressed and-"

"This can't wait!"

She started to ramble something about having gotten bad news and caught up in her rambles she started to walk around in the apartment. It only took her about twenty seconds to reach the bedroom where she lost track of her thoughts and stopped mid-sentence. Chuck was half a step behind her and tried to conceal a groan. It felt wrong to let her come inside Emmy's bedroom. Blair was the biggest threat to his relationship whether she meant to be a threat or not and it almost felt a bit like being unfaithful just to let her come inside the room where he slept next to, and slept with, Emmy.

Blair couldn't think of anything to say as her eyes took in the scene before her. The bed sheets were rumpled, a pair of pajama pants had been thrown on the floor and Chuck was still in his robe even though it was late in the morning. She realized the apartment was way too small to be something Chuck and Nate would buy together and it had definitely been styled by a woman. This had to be Emmy's apartment. She turned around and met Chuck's gaze and panicked for the second time that morning. His girlfriend was probably still here. She needed to get out as soon as she could. She was in no shape to size up the competition at present.

Before she could gather her senses enough to leave a door opened and a woman about Blair's own age came walking out, fingers running through long, thick, brown hair. The same woman Blair had seen on the photo on Chuck's desk.

"Did you say some…" she begun but trailed off when she noticed the unfamiliar woman standing in her bedroom looking like a deer in headlights.

"Emmy…" Chuck said as casually as he could muster. "Meet Blair Waldorf. Blair this is Emmy Banks."

Blair wasn't sure what to say. An unusual feeling of inferiority came over her, probably brought on by how completely unfazed the other woman appeared to be. She didn't seem the slightest bit interesting in seizing Blair up or studying her appearance. As if Blair was nothing to worry about. As if this woman knew she had won already. As if she knew there was never any contest to begin with.

Blair on the other hand could not help appraising her competition. Chuck's girlfriend was annoyingly pretty. The hair was brown, the eyes seemed to be green and the smile was soft. There was something very serene about her whole appearance. The body wrapped in the towel was slender but curvier than Blair's own, touching on several of Blair's sore spots regarding her own physical appearance. She could see a small golden lavaliere around the other woman's neck. Had that been a gift from Chuck?

"So you're the friend?" Emmy said, squeezing a strain of hair to get the water out of it.

Blair felt her heart sink even further. The friend indeed.

"I… didn't realize that this was a bad time" she managed to get out.

"It's no problem" Emmy said. "I'm seriously late for work anyway so I'll be getting out of your hair. Chuck would you please hand me my clothes? I'll just get dressed in the bathroom."

"No" Blair said quickly. "This was a bad idea. You know what, I don't… even know why I rushed over here."

"You said you got bad news" Chuck reminded her.

"Right. And I can fill you in about it later."

She knew she was making a horribly awkward retreat but she didn't care. She turned and hurried out of the apartment, needing to get away from Chuck and his girlfriend and their bedroom. What had she been thinking coming here in the first place? What had she been planning on telling Chuck? She hadn't been thinking straight when she rushed out of the penthouse. All that had been going through her mind was needing someone to turn to and that had instinctively lead her to Chuck.

Back inside the bedroom Chuck shared a look with Emmy, feeling highly uncomfortable yet at the same time relieved that things had gone relatively smoothly in this unplanned introduction of Blair and Emmy.

"What was that all about?" Emmy wanted to know, walking over to the dresser to get her underwear.

"I have no idea" Chuck said honestly.

"So that was Blair then" Emmy nodded. "She seems nice."

Chuck looked towards the door Blair had disappeared through. He wondered what had happened to make her rush over like that and wanted to go after her and see that she was okay but he was still in his robe. He would have to take that shower first and get dressed.

"Have a good day, baby" Emmy said and kissed him on the cheek on her way to the closet. "I'll be gone by the time you get out of the shower. I hope I'll see you tonight. Thank you for a lovely morning."

Chuck mumbled something in reply and walked inside the bathroom, hoping to be able to shower away at least some of the awkwardness. Blair's whole situation had him puzzled. He had never seen her this phased by anything. Whatever was going on with her it had to be something really overwhelming.

* * *

><p>An hour and a half later Serena was the last person to arrive at the penthouse but Blair was upstairs and had yet to come down. She was trying to figure out how to handle this new threat-of-sorts from Malcolm and wanted to have a plan before she joined the others, worried she might make another big mistake if she acted spontaneously. They would simply have to wait for her a few minutes longer.<p>

Downstairs Nate and Dan were on the couch and Serena had crept up in an armchair chewing on a baguette she had bought on the way over. Chuck had sat down by the piano and was playing Neil Young's "_Philadelphia_" in lack of other entertainment. He wondered where Blair was and hoped he would soon find out what the scene that morning had been all about. If she hadn't come down in ten more minutes he was sending Serena up there to check. Or perhaps he should send Serena sooner, before Humphrey got the idea into his head of going up there.

"So… Last night was fun" Dan said.

"It's someone else's turn tonight" Serena emphasized.

"Your turn Dan" Nate said and patted Dan on the shoulder.

"Why me?"

"Why not you?"

Dan rolled his eyes.

"Where the hell is she?" Serena asked. "She's ten minutes late."

"She'll be here" Nate said. "She's probably just stuck on the phone or something."

"Maybe we should go check?" Serena suggested.

"Give her a few more minutes" Chuck said.

"Could you change the tune please?" Dan asked, feeling about ready to snap. "It's been the same melody for like fifteen minutes now."

"Just be glad you don't have '_the Man With The Golden Gun_' stuck in your head" Nate said, wrinkling his eyebrows.

Seamlessly and without a word Chuck started to play "_My Heart Will Go On_" instead. Dan raised an eyebrow.

"Celine Dion?"

"I figured this would better cater to your senses" Chuck replied.

"Chopin" Nate ordered.

Again Chuck seamlessly switched from one melody to another. He only got a dozen notes in before he stopped, frowned and began to search through the collection of notes by the piano. He hadn't played anything by Chopin in several years and couldn't remember much by heart.

"What does it say about you that you can play '_My Heart Will Go On_' from memory but you can't play anything classical?" Dan commented.

"What does it say about you that the closest you've ever gotten to successfully playing any melody on an instrument was in '_Guitar Hero_'?" Chuck shot back.

"I'm going upstairs to see if Blair is coming down this year or the next" Serena said and rose from the armchair.

"There she is now" Nate said.

Blair was slowly descending the stairs and at the sight of her Serena took a seat again, this time on the couch. Blair stopped when she was still three steps up and observed Chuck as he played with some difficulty. She smiled slightly, a pleasant memory sweeping by.

"To hell with Chopin" Chuck muttered and tossed a set of notes aside. He began to play "_Für Elise_" but soon realized that he didn't know it well enough from memory. He stopped playing and looked thoughtful for a moment. Then he began to play "_Walking in Memphis_".

"Chuck" Serena said, leaning over the back of the couch. "If you're going to play something non-classic can't you at least sing along with it? It sounds stupid without singing."

"I don't sing" Chuck said shortly.

A small smile crept across Blair's face. She remembered oh so vividly sharing a bubble bath with him, relaxing in his arms while he sang a corny love song to her. He could sing, at least carry a decent enough tune. He just didn't like doing it in front of people.

There was another pleasant memory, one that involved both singing and this very piano. She didn't get a chance to linger at it however before Nate ordered Chuck to stop playing already so they could get down to business.

"First thing on the agenda for today," Blair said as she walked over to the couch, "is to pay Mrs. Malcolm a little visit."

"Serena and I will handle that" Chuck said, rising from the piano.

Did he seem a touch too eager? Blair couldn't tell for sure. Perhaps she was just paranoid but after this morning she couldn't blame him if he didn't want to spend all day around her.

"We should also try and find out where he lives" Blair added.

"Give your eager lapdog a phone book and let him spend the afternoon figuring it out" Chuck said.

"It would probably be better than your preferred method of seducing people until someone tells you something useful" Dan replied.

"This whole thing is starting to get really old and I don't know about you guys but the sooner we get leverage on this jerk the better" Blair said, trying to ignore the bickering.

"I made plans with June" Nate said. "We're meeting for lunch in half an hour. I'll see what I can gather from that."

"Alright then" Blair said, clasping her hands together. "Off we go. Maybe we can get this lowlife to back off by tomorrow."

Everyone got up and walked towards the elevator. Chuck stopped Blair by putting his hand on her arm and she bit her bottom lip hoping not to reveal the effect of his touch.

"You came to see me this morning" he reminded her. "You said we had a big problem."

"It's been taken care of" Blair lied with a sweet smile. "You go on your merry way. Dan? You're coming with me for the day."

"Don't mind if I do" Dan said and shot Chuck a raised eyebrow.

Chuck resisted the urge to glare at him and tried to ignore the unpleasant feeling he got suspecting that Blair's problem had not been resolved and she was turning to Dan for help. If that were the case he had to live with it.

* * *

><p>"No wonder he wants three million dollars" Serena commented as she and Chuck walked inside the apartment building where Malcolm's wife lived. "This place is not exactly high class. He probably hopes to do a little social climbing."<p>

"To hell with what he wants" Chuck snorted.

"There's not even an elevator!"

"I suppose I need the exercise…" Chuck mumbled. He cast Serena a look as they began to climb the stairs. "Did Blair contact you this morning?"

"No. Why?"

"Just curious. And here's something else I'm curious about. This recent foul mood of yours, might it have to do with something other than a hangover?"

"Like what?"

"I don't know" Chuck said. "Are _you_ in trouble of some sort?"

"Chuck. Of course not."

"You sure about that?"

"Of course I'm sure."

"Then what?"

Serena sighed.

"I'm not in any _trouble_. It's just my love life that's a mess but what else is new? Not that I want to talk to you about it, or Eric whose calls I've been avoiding lately. You haven't been single in forever and probably don't have any recollection of what a messy love life is like."

"Are you kidding? You're talking to the expert here."

"Expert or not I don't need either one of my younger brothers to start dishing out advice" Serena said, not so eager to talk about it.

"Is it Humphrey?" Chuck guessed.

"Dan is not on my radar anymore" Serena said.

"Good because he's in love with Blair."

Serena stopped so abruptly that Chuck bumped into her and nearly lost his balance.

"You know this for sure?" she asked.

"Yes. He told me. Blair must have done something really awful in the past few years to deserve karmic punishment like that." Then he frowned. "You weren't lying to me just now were you? About having feelings for him?"

"No" Serena said. "At least I… Look, it's not so easy to hear, okay?"

"If it's not Humphrey you're sad over then who?"

"It doesn't matter" Serena said and began to walk up the stairs again.

"Are you sure?"

"Chuck just drop it, okay?"

She reached the floor Mrs. Malcolm lived on and began to check the doors to find the right apartment. Chuck was at her heels and stopped beside her when she find the right one.

"We haven't decided what we're going to say to her" Chuck said. "I suggest that we-"

Serena ignored him and knocked on the door. Chuck tried to protest but the door opened almost right away. Mrs. Malcolm, a woman on the wrong side of forty but still rather youthful looking, stared at them with slight confusion.

"Yes?" she said.

Chuck shot Serena an annoyed look, wishing they had decided on a plan before knocking, but Serena looked straight at the older woman with a face that seemed more nervous now.

"Hi" she said. "Is… Is this where Dave Malcolm lives?"

"It used to be" Mrs. Malcolm said in a reserved tone.

"Oh…" Serena said, looking insecure. "Is he here?"

"No."

Chuck was about to say something when Serena suddenly burst into tears. He gave her a wide eyed look which Mrs. Malcolm didn't seem to notice.

"I'm sorry" Serena blubbered. "I'm really sorry. Oh God I can't believe this…"

"What is going on?" Mrs. Malcolm asked, not too pleased with having a younger woman showing up at her door and crying.

"He told me this was where he lived. I believed him. You must be his wife or something. He said he didn't have one. Oh God. Was all of it a lie?"

Impressed by her improvisational skills Chuck put his hand on her shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze but kept his uncomfortable expression.

"I told you this was a bad idea" he said in a low voice that was just loud enough for the older woman to hear.

"No Mike!" Serena said, shrugging his hand away. "I have to know. I have to find out." She looked at Mrs. Malcolm. "I'm terribly sorry about all of this, I just… Oh you must _hate_ me. But do you know where he is now? I _have_ to find him."

"Rach, this is bad enough as it is" Chuck said through gritted teeth. "Dad is going to _kill_ you when he finds out you slept with a _married man_. Let's just get out of here before anything else happens."

Mrs. Malcolm's eyes narrowed.

"You slept with my husband?"

"I didn't know he was married" Serena wailed. "He told me he loved me, he… he told me I was _special_."

"I don't believe this" Mrs. Malcolm said, exasperated.

"Please, I have to know where to get a hold of him" Serena sniveled. "The thing is… You see the thing is…"

"Rachel don't" Chuck warned.

"I'm pregnant" Serena sobbed. "And…"

"Oh good God" Mrs. Malcolm sighed. "I cannot believe him. First he lies to me about his…" She shook her head. "I really don't believe this."

"Now I'll never be able to go to college" Serena blubbered.

Chuck cast Serena another worried glance. This might get them Malcolm's address but it wasn't likely to get them any information about his marriage or any past sins.

"Oh!" Serena said and put her hand over her mouth. "Oh no. I think I'm going to be sick. Please, please let me…"

"Second door on the left" Mrs. Malcolm said in a resigned tone and stepped aside.

Serena ran inside, hand covering her mouth, and shut herself in the bathroom. Chuck gave the older woman an apologetic look.

"We really didn't mean to…" he began. "It's just my sister, she…"

Mrs. Malcolm sighed again.

"You might as well come in and wait for her. I'll give you my husband's current address but then I want you to leave. The last thing I need is for my kids to come home and find some young twinkie their father knocked up."

Chuck nodded and thanked her, looking around as discreetly as he could as he entered the apartment.

* * *

><p>Blair nervously tapped a pencil against a pad and looked around the room. She couldn't keep still, she needed information and she didn't want to wait. Next to her Dan sat leaned back in the uncomfortable plastic chair, glancing at her with a worried expression.<p>

"Would you relax?" he said. "They're not going to get to you any sooner because you're bouncing off the walls."

"I can't relax" Blair said. "I need to know if there are any official documents here about Sebastian."

"Why would there be?" Dan said. "He was born in France. Besides who would even know to come looking?"

"I'm not going to bet on there not being any information" Blair said. "I need to know."

Above all she needed to make things easier on herself and just come clean to Chuck already, regardless of that girlfriend of his. It didn't matter if he was completely over Blair and madly in love with Emmy, Sebastian was still his son. She seemed to be coming to this conclusion several times a day yet she never actually went through with it and sometimes she wondered if she even would tell Chuck the truth before leaving New York.

"God Dan, I'm such a horrible person, aren't I?" she said sadly.

"What? Blair what are you talking about?"

"You used to say it about me all the time and you were right. I'm horrid."

"You're not a horrible person" Dan insisted. "What makes you say that?"

"What makes me say that?" Blair echoed, giving him a look of disbelief. "I bore my great love's child and I never told him about it. I kept the man I will always love from his child and my child from his father. What kind of person does that? What kind of soulless, heartless person tells a person they love them with all their heart and then keep the most important thing in their life secret from them? Chuck and I loved each other and we made our son out of love and I kept it a secret. You tell me what kind of person does a thing like that!"

She had begun to worked herself up to a hushed frenzy and Dan glanced nervously around the room. Luckily there was only one other person there right now, an elderly, overweight man who seemed completely engrossed in a "_Reader's Digest_".

"Blair" Dan said, putting a hand on her arm. "Calm down."

"I can't calm down. I've ruined everything. How could I do something like this to Chuck? I've been asking myself that question every day for four years and I never find an answer."

"You did it because you put your son first" Dan said. "You may have loved Chuck once but you love Sebastian more."

"I can't even _think_ about how I've wronged Sebastian" Blair said. "His own mother keeping him and his father apart… I'm going to burn in hell aren't I?"

"Now wait just a minute" Dan said. "Blair we both know Chuck Bass would make an awful father. They guy is… practically insane."

"Is judging people like a pacemaker to you?" Blair asked. "Without it will you keel over and die? Right now I'm really eager to find out."

"I'm not judging, I'm just pointing out what we already know."

"All you ever do is judge him" Blair said icily. "I can't stand to listen to it. You'd think that if you were really my friend you'd show some respect for the people I love."

"I'm your friend, not your enabler."

"You used to hate me too, remember?" Blair pointed out. "You used to think I was _evil_ pretty much. Chuck and I are so much more alike than you realize. It makes no sense to me how you can call me a friend but you find no redeeming qualities whatsoever in him."

"Blair the guy's a psycho! He traded you for a hotel, he-"

"Enough!" Blair snarled. Then she softened. "That bitchy, destructive side of me you judged so harshly? That's part of who I am Dan. It's not who I am because of him, it's who I always have been. You choose not to see the darker sides of me anymore." She sighed and ran her fingers through a strain of hair. "You hate the darker side of me. Nate did too. Serena couldn't really stomach it either, not completely. Now you try to pretend like that side doesn't exist and that I only do bad things when pushed to the limit but that's not true. The only one who fully accepted that part of me was Chuck. He was the only person who saw me through and through for who I really was and loved what he saw, regardless of imperfections and dark traits." She realized she had tears falling down her face and wiped one away with the back of her hand. "I think that's why I'm so scared. Why I haven't said anything to him yet. The moment he finds out that might be it. For the first time there might be a part of me he can't reconcile with. A part he can't accept. I don't know that I can live with that. Him and I shared something that was… beyond special. Something that was once in a lifetime and ought to be cherished. Chuck saw the real me and I think I was one of the only people he allowed to see the real him. The Charles who had a fear of trusting people and felt like everyone let him down sooner or later. Everyone but me."

"Blair, come on…" Dan said softly.

"I let him down worse than anybody else" Blair said, wiping away a tear. "I knew all his wants and desires and all his fears and I did something that's going to hurt him worse than anything else. His _son_, Dan. His and my child. We were supposed to raise our children together and I took that from him. It was selfish."

"You were not selfish" Dan objected. "You were thinking of what would be best for your son. Despite your romanticized view of Chuck you knew he wouldn't be a good father."

"Chuck would be an amazing father" Blair objected. "I know. You don't. It's going to kill him to find out he was robbed of his son's birth, infancy and early childhood and that I was the one to do that to him. I think I haven't been able to tell him yet because I can't stand the thought of getting confirmation that there are sides of me that are so ugly that no one, not even my kindred spirit, can accept them."

"Okay I think you've gone a little mental with all this emotional stress" Dan said. "Right now you're talking crazy. What you did was… was wrong perhaps in some people's eyes. But you did it with the best intentions. You're not rotten to the core the way you're trying to paint yourself out to be."

"Maybe not" Blair said and tried to dry her eyes. "But I'm a selfish bitch. And I'm a coward. I just don't understand how I ended up like this."

A door opened and a woman said Blair's name. She got up and wiped away the remaining tears, putting her game face back on. She was a little embarrassed over her breakdown and glad to be given an excuse to end the conversation. She followed the woman to the other room to find out if there were any public documents regarding the birth of her son.

* * *

><p>"Sister, that was incredible!" Chuck exclaimed the moment they were on their way down the stairs again.<p>

"Blair's not the only one who can put up a good show when she wants to" Serena smirked. "Though I feel bad for that poor woman, thinking that her husband cheated on her when he didn't."

"What difference does it make?" Chuck shrugged. "They're divorcing anyway."

"Did you get anything useful from looking around?"

"Yes. While you feigned morning sickness in the bathroom I pretended to be the highly concerned brother wanting information on the creep who knocked up my sister."

"And?"

"Apparently the reason for the divorce is that our friend Malcolm likes the drugs. He handles it discreetly enough for his co-workers to be unaware but not discreetly enough to fool his family. So she kicked him out."

"He's a junkie?"

"Something along those lines. Which probably explains this whole mystery, really."

"What do you mean?"

"Either he really needs a lot of money to fund his growing addiction" Chuck said. "Or he borrowed drug money from someone at some point and now he can't afford to pay them back. That's probably where the limo ride yesterday comes into the picture. Nate should be with June right now; I'm going to call him and ask him to see if he can spot the limo again today and if so maybe try and get a license plate."

"Nate went to see her again?" Serena asked in what was supposed to be a casual tone but failed.

"Yeah…" Chuck said, giving her a look. "Why?"

"No reason."

"Serena" Chuck said, stopping her with a hand on her arm as they reached the bottom floor. "This love trouble of yours, it's not about Nate is it?"

"Of course not" Serena said and try to laugh but it sounded hollow. "Are you serious? Why would I have any feelings for the guy who's been walking around all morning singing lines from "_The Man With The Golden Gun_"? It's ridiculous."

"You were in love with him before" Chuck said gently. "Maybe those feelings never really went away? Look I know you've been in a really great mood lately and that it changed just a few days ago. At first I attributed it to your issues with Blair and then to you having feelings for Humphrey but… Am I wrong here or are you in love with my best friend?"

Serena wanted to claim otherwise but instead she started to sob. Chuck gave her a concerned look, knowing her real tears from the fake display she put up in front of Mrs. Malcolm.

"Sis…" he said softly and pulled her in to a hug.

Overwhelmed by everything that had happened in the last few days she clung to him and cried. He didn't say anything, making no attempt to comfort but that was just what she felt she needed. She didn't want comfort right now. She wanted to vent her frustration. Wordlessly crying was exactly what she needed.

* * *

><p>She began to talk in the limo on their way back. They had sat down on opposite seats, Chuck giving her a bit of space which seemed to make talking about it easier. He had given her a handkerchief and she twirled it in her hands, looking at it as she began to speak.<p>

"I used to be so jealous of you and Blair" she said.

"What?" Chuck said, not following the line of thought.

"Back when you guys were dating. I saw how happy you were. I wanted that kind of love for myself. I think I… I thought that maybe you guys being childhood friends had something to do with the success of your relationship, you know? If so then Nate ought to be the perfect match for me, right? That's the conclusion I drew anyway. When we were going out after high school I don't think it was so much real love from my side but a strong desire for it to be the real thing. In the end though I realized Nate wasn't the perfect guy for me just because he was an old friend."

"So you broke his heart" Chuck said. "What has changed now?"

"I don't know Chuck, I think this time it kind of… snuck up on me. We've been _just friends_ for the first time since high school. Along the way I guess I just… fell, you know? Started to enjoy his company more than before, different than before."

"He hasn't said much about you that way in a long time" Chuck said. "He might still have feelings for you but I can't tell you for certain."

"I thought he did" Serena said. "I thought we were moving closer to something more serious. I don't know, then _this_ whole thing happened."

"What do you mean?" Chuck asked.

"All of this. Blair coming back and Dan acting like her new favorite minion and this whole scheme thing and… Honestly, since Blair left I've come to realize I don't have all that many friends. I know a lot of people but there are few I can really confide in."

"You can talk to me" Chuck offered.

"You and Nate are pretty much the only ones left" Serena said. "I used to think I had Dan but now I doubt it. As for Nate… You understand why I can't talk to him about this."

"Sure."

"It's not so easy to talk about" Serena said. "I always… used to turn to Blair about things like this. You know? I feel like I haven't had anybody to really confide in when it comes to these things. Now she's back and I don't even know if she wants to be my friend still."

"That handkerchief you're holding, she dropped it when I gave her a ride home the other night" Chuck said. "It's embroidered with an S. Clearly she hasn't forgotten about you even though she's been absent."

"I've tried to take the first step since she's been back" Serena said. "But honestly… Chuck what if the secret is connected to her and Dan? What if there's something more going on between them than we really know? That's the only thing I can think of that would make her drop all contact with me. She knows I would have a hard time dealing with the idea of her and Dan together."

"That can't be it" Chuck said, intensely hoping he was right. "Dan is an afterthought, nothing more. Come on, he's been in LA and New York while she's been in France. They can't have had something… going on."

"Then why did she toss our friendship aside like it was nothing?"

"I don't know" Chuck said. "I wish I did. Look, about Nate, what's got you upset these past few days is me sending him to seduce that bartender isn't it?"

"You may have sent him but he was the one who chose to go along with it" Serena said. "Just the other week him and I were flirting and we… we made out. At a club. I thought there was something more going on but clearly I was wrong if he can rush into bed with some random chick right in front of me."

"Or maybe he's afraid" Chuck said. "Trust me I wrote the book on being afraid of getting seriously involved with someone. He got burned pretty badly the last time you guys had a thing. It makes sense that he would take the opportunity to keep things from getting serious."

"Maybe you're right" Serena said.

"I'm going to talk to him and tell him the June part of the plan is over."

"Chuck you don't have to do that. What about Blair's thing?"

"The whole scheme does not ride on that girl" Chuck said. "Blair's thing is not so important that you should be miserable over it. Or if it is she had damn well better fess up what we're doing all this for. I will tell Nate that June has served her purposes and we need his focus elsewhere and that will be the end of that."

"Thank you."

"You should talk to Blair about this" Chuck said. "She can help you more than I can. She loves you, you know that. Take a leap of faith, even if she hasn't deserved it. I wouldn't have gotten far unless she had done that for me."

"I'll talk to Blair" Serena nodded slowly. She smiled slightly and leaned over to hand him back the handkerchief. "Take this. It probably means more to you than it does to me."

He didn't argue. He took the handkerchief and put it back in his pocket.

"What about you?" she asked. "How are you handling it?"

"Handling what?"

"Blair being back. Oh don't give me that look, I know you're not indifferent."

"I could never be indifferent to her" Chuck admitted. "But Serena I have a girlfriend. I _love_ my girlfriend."

"You're not the least bit curious to what Blair has been up to all these years?"

"You forget who you're talking to. If I wanted to know what she was up to I would have had a PI give me answers."

"Why haven't you?" Serena asked. "I've been assuming you've know most about what Blair's been up to since she left New York and then it turns out you're as clueless as the rest of us. It's not like you to not stalk those you care about."

"It's easier not knowing" Chuck said. "If I had been keeping tabs on Blair I would have never gotten into a serious relationship with Emmy, or anyone. I had to remove Blair from my life in order to move on."

"Now she's back and you have to integrate her into your world again. You seem to be doing a fairly good job for the moment but will you be able to if she stays in New York?"

"What are you suggesting? That I'd cheat on my girlfriend?"

"No. I'm just wondering how you will handle it if when this is over Blair really does stay. Are you over her?"

"Serena I haven't the faintest idea how I would incorporate Blair into my life if she comes back into it for good" Chuck said. "It's not been the same without her. I would love to have her back as a friend. Though we all know that with Blair and me it will never really be just friendship. I don't think I could do that to Emmy. Hang out with my first love whom I will always have feelings for. I don't know how I would solve the problem and I prefer not to think about it for now."

"Do you want Blair to stay?" Serena asked, wondering if Chuck would actually prefer it if Blair left again.

"I really do" Chuck said, against better judgment.

"Well then" Serena said. "Let's try and convince her to stay, shall we? You and Nate are great and we have a lot of good times together but you're no replacement for my best friend."

Chuck smiled slightly.

"No one is ever able to replace Blair" he said. "In any regard."

* * *

><p>Yeah I know you only got to "meet" Sebastian very briefly… Hope it wasn't too disappointing. Four more chapters to go, hope you'll stay with me till the end! Thanks for reading and please leave a review =)<p> 


	7. Chapter 7

Things are getting rather serious in this story… so I think we might need a chapter that's a little lighter. It pretty much continues where the previous one left off.

I know many of you want Chuck to find out the truth already but I'm afraid you'll have to wait a little longer. The mess needs to get a little messier first… if that makes any sense lol.

Anyways, on to the chapter!

* * *

><p>"Nobody's upstairs either" Serena said, coming down the stairs with a frown. "I don't get it. Where is everyone?"<p>

Chuck shrugged a shoulder from his spot on the divan.

"Perhaps we're the first one's back."

"Maybe…" Serena said. "Still, I think I'm going to call Blair."

Chuck nodded. Most of all he just wanted to go home. To his own apartment, not Emmy's. This day had been confusing and a bit more emotional than he felt comfortable with. He hadn't been able to stop thinking of how he was probably the worst boyfriend in the whole city. When Blair had shown up that morning he had been more concerned with how she would feel running into Emmy than he had been over Emmy's feelings and reaction. He tried to excuse it by insisting that he had known Emmy wouldn't freak out or feel threatened but still his reaction was backwards. He really didn't feel like seeing either woman tonight and wanted some time alone to try and get his act together.

He looked over at Serena who was on the phone with Blair. He wondered how he could have missed the budding romance resurrection between her and Nate. Had he not been paying any attention these past few weeks, or months? He felt like a jerk for sending Nate after the bartender when Serena had feelings for him. He knew better than anyone what it was like to love someone and watch them give attention to someone else.

Serena hung up the phone and walked over.

"So guess where Blair is?" she said in a displeased tone.

"Coney Island?"

"She's in Brooklyn. At the loft." Serena made a face and put her phone away. "Am I crazy that this bothers me so much?"

"No" Chuck said, resisting the urge to throw in an insult about Dan. "I know I can't throw stones here but you are entitled to feeling upset and perhaps a bit betrayed. When Nate found out about Blair and me he ended our friendship."

"I don't want to end Blair's and my friendship" Serena said, sinking down on the couch. "Only I don't know if there's anything left to end."

"She will tell you why she's been away all these years" Chuck said. "She might not tell me or Nate but she'll tell you. And you guys can rebuild your friendship."

"Funny" Serena said with a joyless laugh. "I'm quite sure she'll tell you if you ask her but she won't tell Nate or me."

"So what did she say? Are we off duty for tonight?"

"No she wants us to come to the loft. We're having home cooked dinner."

"If it's waffles I'm going home" Chuck said, getting up from his seat.

"If it's waffles can we spike Dan's with laxatives?" Serena asked and chuckled.

"I like vindictive Serena" Chuck smirked. "Come on, let's go. We'll call Nate and pick him up on the way over."

* * *

><p>Blair sat curled up on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, looking out on the gloomy afternoon outside. It had started to rain and her mood seemed to get worse with the weather. She was barely aware of the cup of tea in her hand or of Dan who was walking around searching for something and talking almost non-stop. She had found a copy of Sebastian's birth certificate earlier in the day and it scared her a little. She hadn't even considered that there might be a copy somewhere in the US. She wondered who else might have seen it and if maybe Malcolm had a copy of it. She was even more concerned that Chuck might have sent a PI out to dig up her secret even though he had said he wouldn't, and that the PI would get a hold of the document. Chuck's name was not on it but he would only have to look at Sebastian's date of birth to be able to do the math and realize that he might be the father.<p>

"Dan…" she said without taking her eyes from the window. "Tell me honestly. How do you think Chuck will react when he finds out?"

Dan stopped walking around and looked thoughtful.

"Probably not very well."

"I can't expect anything else, can I?" Blair sighed, running a hand through her hair.

"If he loves you he'll understand" Dan said absentmindedly, continuing his search. "Seriously, how does an iPod get lost?"

"I just hope he… I just hope he won't completely hate me."

"You're better off without him" Dan mumbled.

"Oh yeah? Then why have I felt incomplete for years now?"

"I don't know why but I'm fairly sure Chuck is not the answer" Dan said, lifting a pile of music magazines to see if his iPod was underneath it. "Honestly, where can the damn thing be? I had it this morning."

"It's not about needing a _man_ to be complete" Blair said even though Dan had not insinuated that it was what she had meant. "One of the old Greeks, I think it was Plato, said that people were once creatures with four arms, four legs and two faces. The gods split them into two because they feared humans would get too powerful. So we spend our lives trying to find that other half of us. That's how I feel. Like I was only really whole with him. And I really believe he felt he was only whole when he was with me."

"Pretty bold assumption considering he's been with the same woman for four years now" Dan pointed out. "Maybe she's the other half of him?"

"Ugh" Blair said. "I don't know why I try to get any sensible advice out of you."

"I understand love" Dan said. "It's not that. I just don't think your soulmate is a guy like Chuck. You deserve better."

"I think I deserve to be happy" Blair objected. "Besides, I'm not convinced you get what real love is. What was that god awful thing you wrote in your book? When one character said to another something about how without them their life was like driving through the rain without windshield wipers?"

"That was supposed to be a modern-"

A knock on the door interrupted him. He walked over to answer it and Blair sipped on her tea, hoping one of her friends would have some valuable information. Dan opened the door and Nate, Serena and Chuck came walking in.

"Fine, but I don't really get it" Nate said, in the middle of a conversation with the other two. "It _was_ a good idea Chuck and it's paid off today."

"It wasn't a good idea" Chuck argued. "It was a stupid risk to take. How do we know Malcolm doesn't keep tabs on Blair's old friends? He might be aware that we have a spy in place and that's not going to do us any favors."

"What are you talking about?" Blair frowned.

"Chuck wants me to stop seeing June and forget that whole angle" Nate said, taking off his wet jacket. "I don't follow the logic."

"That's just you being you" Chuck smirked.

"I'm telling you, it's paying off!" Nate insisted.

"Okay back up the train" Blair said. "Chuck what is all this about? If you're turning fifth column on me there will be repercussions."

"Chuck maybe all this _can_ wait" Serena said in a low voice though not looking thrilled at the idea.

"For the record I thought this was a bad idea from the start" Dan said. "That poor girl deserves better than to be used this way."

"Who asked you to have an opinion?" Chuck said.

"I'm currently supporting yours" Dan pointed out.

"Frankly it's tainting my opinion."

"Why should I stop calling June when she's being of use to us?" Nate asked.

"Because she's not someone you're entitled to make use of?" Dan suggested.

"Romancing this girl was my plan when we had no other plan" Chuck said. "I never thought it would bring us much of interest and we need Nathaniel for other things. Besides with what Serena and I discovered today this might all be over tomorrow."

"Really?" Blair said excitedly and sat up straight.

"One thing at a time, alright?" Nate said, using his sleeve to wipe his wet beard.

"Forget it Archibald, bartender girl is irrelevant" Blair said, waving her hand dismissively. "What did Chuck and Serena discover?"

"As it turns out, your blackmailer has a drug problem" Serena said.

"That… does explain a whole lot" Blair said thoughtfully. "It would take someone on drugs to threaten an innocent…" She trailed off, realizing she had been about to mention her child. Quickly she harked and put her cup down on the coffee table. "Okay so he's a drug addict. Explains why he needs three million dollars I suppose, depending on which substance he uses or who he bought or stole from."

"There's your motivation right there" Chuck said.

"Really?" Dan said. "That's it? All of this because some guy has a drug problem?"

"People have done far crazier things to get a hold of the good stuff" Nate said, slumping down in an armchair.

"Okay, I'm going to go work on dinner" Dan said. "Whatever you guys plan on doing with this information, I'd probably rather not know about it."

"Geez you are soft, aren't you?" Chuck snorted.

Dan walked to the kitchen without comment. Blair put her feet down on the floor and leaned forward.

"Alright then so how do we nail this sucker?" she asked. "Any suggestions?"

"I don't know guys, doesn't this seem a little easy?" Nate said.

"What do you mean?" Chuck asked.

"A drug problem seems like such a simple answer. And there are a hundred other things he could have done to get money."

"I'm with you on that" Chuck said. "But he came across Blair's little secret and he saw an opportunity. When you hear hooves think horses."

"I don't know why you're bringing animals into this but seriously, I'm not so sure all of this comes from one guy needing drug money."

"Perhaps not" Blair nodded. "But it's still good enough leverage. The rest is secondary. If we get him to back off we can take our sweet time figuring out the rest."

"Which is where June might be relevant" Nate said.

"Enough with June already!" Chuck snarled.

"When I was visiting her at her office today I took the opportunity to bribe the janitor into letting me borrow his keys tonight" Nate said. "He'll call me when he gets off, which should be sometime past six, I'll go down and take his keys and then return them to him in the morning. We can snoop around that office all we want and see if we can find anything."

"You mean like whatever evidence Malcolm has against me?" Blair said with a worried face. "If that's the case then I alone handle that part, alright?"

"Whatever, I don't care who does what" Nate said with rolling eyes. "The point is we could find something useful and I think we should take the opportunity."

"So what about you Blair?" Serena asked. "Did you find anything out today?"

"I… Yeah I had a productive day."

"But none of Malcolm's college associates knew about the drug problem?"

Blair looked confused.

"College associates?"

"Yeah… Weren't you off trying to get a hold of them today?"

Blair blinked twice, trying to remember if she had ever claimed that or if Serena had just assumed.

"I was… busy with something else. It's a long story."

"Forget about his college associates for now" Nate said. Then he nodded his head to the tune that was stuck in his head and hummed a few notes. "_He has a powerful weapon_…"

"Nate please, enough with that song already" Serena said.

"We'll look into the college lead if we need to" Blair nodded. "For now let's focus on the drug part."

She made a nervous hand gesture and accidentally knocked over her tea cup. She quickly pulled her feet up on the couch to avoid getting any of the hot beverage on her and gasped when she saw that the mug was spilling tea all over her new Chanel bag.

"Are you okay?" Nate asked her. "You didn't burn yourself?"

"Forget Blair, she can heal!" Serena cried. "Is the bag alright?"

Blair looked over and saw that Chuck had come over and knelt by the couch to salvage what had been drenched in the pool of tea. With a touch of panic Blair realized she had Sebastian's birth certificate in her bag and Chuck was reaching for a bunch of papers that had fallen out of it. She tossed the quilt aside and dove down on the floor to get the bag and papers.

"Chuck!" she exclaimed. "Go tell Dan to come out here!"

Chuck frowned.

"Can't I just holler at him from here? Can't _you_ just holler at him from here?"

"_An assassin that's second to none…_" Nate hummed unhelpfully, getting a glare from Chuck in return.

"Just go" Blair said. "Please."

Rolling his eyes Chuck got up and walked over to the kitchen area.

"Hey Cinderella!" he said, leaning against the kitchen island. "Queen B needs you to come mop up after her."

"In a minute" Dan said, having observed the tea incident from the kitchen. "I'm just going to put dinner in the oven first."

"I can do that" Chuck offered, preferring kitchen duty to clean-up duty. "You go serve her highness. Maybe not in the way you'd most like to, but…"

Dan gave him a look and opened the oven to put a meatloaf in.

"Someone needs to get the potatoes ready" he said. "Maybe you and your privileged friends can help Blair while I attend to dinner?"

"I said I'll handle dinner" Chuck said, walking over to the stove.

"When has Chuck Bass ever cooked a meal?"

"It's boiling potatoes, Humphrey" Chuck said. "It's not rocket science."

"Okay fine" Dan said, leaving the kitchen area with two towels in his hands.

* * *

><p>"Well what do I know about cooking?" Chuck shrugged later on when they were seated around the table eating the more than overly cooked potatoes. "It's always Nate or Emmy that cooks when we don't order in."<p>

"What kind of an idiot cannot boil potatoes?" Dan wondered. "It's not like… rocket science."

"Some of us were born to boil potatoes, others were meant for grander things."

"Enough!" Serena moaned, slamming her glass down. "I can't take it anymore. Either shut up or have sex already."

"No can do, sis" Chuck said amicably. "Emmy will only agree to a threesome if the third person is another man."

Serena groaned and made an exasperated face. Nate pretended to be at his happy place and Blair frowned while swallowing a bite of food, wishing she could stab Chuck in the thigh with her fork every time he mentioned names that began with the letter E.

"Enough Chuck" she said.

"Yes, enough, please" Dan said, passing the gravy to Nate. "It would be nice to have some peace and quiet around here for a change."

"Oh give it a rest Humphrey, you're just as bad as he is" Blair snarled.

"Can we please just have some civilized conversation over dinner?" Serena pleaded.

"I'm sorry" Dan said. "I'll try to… not be goaded."

Chuck raised an eyebrow but said nothing, stabbing a potato with his fork and putting it in his mouth with a pensive expression.

"Okay then" Serena said.

They ate in silence. Blair and Serena were both feeling frustrated, Nate's mind had drifted off, Dan was annoyed that his dinner had gotten ruined by Chuck's attempts at cooking and Chuck was trying to decide whether or not he should got back to Emmy's place tonight. She probably wouldn't be home until late, nor would he, but in his current confused mindset he wasn't sure he wanted to act the supportive boyfriend when she got in exhausted from work. It would feel a little wrong when he knew his mind would be on Blair.

"_Love is required whenever he's hired…_" Nate hummed to himself, breaking the silence. "_He comes just before the kill._"

Serena and Chuck shared a look. Dan couldn't stop himself from bursting out laughing and was immediately joined by the other two. Blair scoffed and rolled her eyes while Nate just looked confused.

"What?" he asked.

"Real mature guys" Blair commented dryly.

"Scaramanga's a dirty, dirty boy" Chuck said with an eyebrow raised, prompting more laughter from Dan and Serena.

Blair just shook her head and continued to eat her dinner. A smile slowly crept across her face after a minute. It was nice to have the mood lightened, even if it was just for a moment.

* * *

><p>After they were done eating Blair, Serena, Chuck and Nate sat down to make plans for the next day, leaving Dan to clean up after dinner. It didn't take them long to agree on a strategy and Blair felt herself relax a bit. Finally it seemed like they had the upper hand and perhaps she could have her problem taken care of by tomorrow. It was also riveting to finally be plotting something with her favorite scheming minds again. The speed at which they concocted a plan together made her heart swell a little, as if the four of them were still in fine sync after all these years. For the first time since she had called them all together she felt like she was a real part of the group.<p>

"Feeling a bit better now Blair?" Serena asked with a smile.

"I always enjoy being the one in control" Blair said, smiling back. "Ah, finally a good takedown. You know it's been years since my last one?"

"What, no farmer revolts to overthrow in France these days?" Nate smiled.

"Surprisingly few."

"So, do you guys have a plan in place?" Dan asked, walking in from the kitchen.

"By this time tomorrow Malcolm will be out of my hair and squashed under my heel like the creepy bug he is" Blair said.

"And if the plan you've hatched doesn't work?" Dan asked.

"Then we'll tie him up and force him to watch '_the Room_' until he cracks" Chuck said.

"That would do the trick" Dan agreed.

"I'm so excited I'm practically vibrating" Blair grinned, clapping her hands together.

"That's more information than I needed" Nate noted.

"I'm glad to hear you're excited" Dan said. "Hope you'll be even more excited when I tell you what I've got planned for tonight."

"You've got something planned for tonight?" Blair asked.

"Yep" Dan said, walking over to a shelf and grabbing a box. "Board games."

Chuck gave him a look.

"Are you kidding? Aren't we a little… old for that? By at least a decade?"

"You're never too old to play '_Risk_'" Dan said, placing the game on the table. "Now come on and gather around. Unless of course you'd rather leave, Chuck. Frankly I'd prefer that."

"Chuck out-ranks you in this operation so keep such thoughts to yourself" Blair said, taking a seat by the table.

"We're in my loft" Dan argued.

"We're in my scheme" Blair countered.

"As much as I enjoy the two of you not getting along," Chuck said, pulling out a chair next to where Nate had sat down, "I'm going to avoid stirring issues, behave myself and play nice and join the… aimed-at-twelve-year-olds fun."

"Oh cut it out, you love strategy games" Nate snorted.

"Do we have to play '_Risk_'?" Serena asked. "Chuck and Blair are evil masterminds who always kick my butt in these kind of games."

"I kick your butt in '_Uno_'" Chuck smirked. "So does Nate's five year-old cousin."

Serena reached over the table to give him a playful smack but he ducked with a laugh.

"Okay no _physical_ kicking of butts please" Dan said, beginning to lay out the game.

"I make no promises" Serena said with a laugh.

"I do admit," Chuck said while reaching for the black army figures, "this game has its charm. I suppose spending an hour playing it won't be so bad."

"An hour?" Dan snorted.

"It's unlikely to take much longer than that" Chuck said. "It's a game based on world domination and I only have one worthy adversary."

"Who says you get to be black?" Nate asked, slapping him on the hand.

"None of the units are purple and black is my fallback color" Chuck said jovially.

"I call yellow!" Serena said. "It fits my blonde, shiny hair."

"A reason as good as any" Chuck shrugged.

"I'll be red" Blair smiled and collected her units.

"Blue" Nate said.

"So I guess I'm green then" Dan said. "I'll be the environmentally friendly army."

"Prepare to be annihilated" Chuck said in a Darth Vader voice that caused Serena to laugh and Dan to roll his eyes.

"So does everyone know the rules of the game?" Dan asked.

"It's been over a decade but I think I can catch up fairly quickly" Nate said.

"The little cavalry tokens are really adorable" Serena said, studying one of her units.

"Right then, let's place our armies" Dan said and started handing out cards.

"What are you doing?" Blair asked.

"Handing out cards to see who gets what territories."

"Can't we just take turns picking?" Nate questioned.

"Just place them as your cards indicate, would you?"

"Isn't this going to be a treat?" Chuck said sarcastically, picking up the cards Dan had dealt him.

"Great, I start with Alaska" Serena mumbled. "Why do I get Alaska when Nate gets sunny Western Europe?"

"Forget about the vacation value of your territories" Dan said. "Alaska is not a bad territory to have."

"_If you want to get rid of someone_…" Nate hummed to himself.

"Seriously Nate" Blair moaned.

"I'm starting to regret getting you the complete James Bond DVD-set for Christmas" Chuck said and placed a unit on India.

"I didn't get it stuck in my head because of that; it's from the stupid club last night" Nate said. "Okay I've got Yakutsk, where the hell is that and how do you pronounce it?"

They placed their units and then argued for a few minutes over who should get the two territories that were left over before the dice decided in favor of Serena and Chuck. When they began to play Nate went first and set out to attack Dan whose Egypt was next to Nate's North Africa. He failed to take over the territory and it was then Blair's turn. She studied the board to conjure up a strategy. When she glanced up her eyes met Chuck's. He was smiling at her and glanced over towards Dan and then back at her. She smiled back and decided to attack Dan as well.

Before Dan knew it he was being subjected to the combined efforts of Blair and Chuck to eliminate him from the game. He watched with some confusion how Chuck practically gave away his only territory in South America to Blair by taking North Africa from Nate and then moving all but one troop from Brazil to his new territory allowing Blair, who had just taken Dan's one South American territory, to win the whole continent. Directly following that a similar thing happened over in Australia only this time Chuck was the one who ended up with the whole continent. Then they seemed to focus most of their energy into getting Dan wherever he was rather than seizing entire continents.

"What is going on here?" he asked after twenty minutes. "Why are you two so gung-ho on kicking me out of the game?"

"The weakest links must be removed first" Blair said in a serene voice.

"That makes no sense" Dan objected. "You'd want to get rid of the strongest player. Why aren't you battling each other?"

"Patience Humphrey…" Chuck said and rolled the dice to try and take Dan's only European territory.

"They always do this" Serena said. "Ever since we were little kids. They'd form an alliance to take the rest of us down and then battle it out amongst each other."

"Why the hell for?" Dan complained. "Again, why not _start_ by taking each other out if you think you're each other's biggest threat?"

"Not as much of a challenge" Chuck said.

"It's way more fun to dish it out when it's just us two left" Blair said. "And it looks like you're now an ex-European, Humphrey."

"When did you even decide to start picking on me?" Dan wondered.

Neither Chuck nor Blair answered. Blair's smile was getting wider by the minute. She thoroughly enjoyed teaming up with Chuck against the others in a callback to the good old days. When the two of them worked together no one else stood a chance. Though Nate and Serena did put up a good fight. Since Chuck and Blair focused on Dan at first they tried to ally themselves against their more ruthless friends but didn't manage to get far.

"Okay, I'm out" Dan sighed when Blair took his last remaining territory.

"All your base are belong to us" Chuck smirked.

"If you guys will excuse me I'm going to go see if I can find my damn iPod."

"Bye now" Chuck said and studied the board.

"You're going to take Madagascar away from me now, aren't you?" Serena moped. "It's my favorite territory."

"Why?" Nate wondered.

"The penguins are cute. In the movie."

"The sooner you take it from her the better" Nate commented to Blair.

Blair giggled and looked over at Chuck. Their best strategy at present seemed to be to go after Nate which meant Serena could keep her Madagascar for a little while longer.

"I honestly don't know why I even bother" Nate sighed with exasperation ten minutes later when he was sure he was on the receiving end of a major Chuck and Blair attack. "Next time we're playing '_Trivial Pursuit'_."

"Just sit back and relax Archibald" Chuck said while moving his units into the formerly Nate-owned China. "This will all be over in a second."

"Yeah and then you'll crush Serena and we'll have to sit here and watch World War Three between you and Blair."

"Alliances should be forbidden in this stupid game" Serena moped.

"I am getting tired of your attitude missy" Blair said and directed her next attack at Madagascar out of spite.

"No!" Serena complained. "Not Madagascar! Objection!"

"Overruled" Chuck said.

"Sustained" Nate said at the same time.

Serena moaned. Blair's smile faded a bit. This was the second time she had heard them throw out an objection that had either been overruled or sustained by one of the others. Clearly an inside joke between them which Blair knew nothing about. She thought of how Emmy probably knew all about it and probably was even the origin of the stupid joke and her good mood was gone for the moment. The fact that she failed to take Madagascar from Serena didn't help brighten her mood. Serena's joy was short-lived when Chuck's turn came around and he took over her favorite territory before taking the one Blair had left on that continent.

"Thank you for that sis" he grinned. "I now own all of Africa which gives me an additional three units per round."

"Good for you" Serena snarled. "Nate still holds all of North America though so perhaps you should go back to focusing on bullying him."

"Hey!" Nate objected.

"Take it up with Blair" Chuck said. "I don't own any territories adjacent to North America. Then again I could start working my way to Kamchatka and invade him from there."

Serena stuck out her tongue at him. Kamchatka was one of the few territories she had been able to take from Blair and at present she held about half of Asia and not much else. She had no plans on letting Chuck invade her and hoped he hadn't figured out she was intending on invading his Australian territories.

"_No one can catch him, no hit-man can match him…_" Nate hummed.

"Oh for God's sake I'm this close to clobbering you" Chuck groaned. "Enough with that ridiculous song!"

"If anybody sees my iPod…" Dan said, walking by.

"And enough from _you_ about the damn iPod" Chuck said. "Just buy yourself a new one like normal people do when they misplace theirs."

"There are _no_ normal people who do that" Dan objected.

"Focus Bass!" Blair said.

"Why does he need to focus?" Nate asked. "It's your turn."

"I do my best work with an audience" Blair said with a sly smile.

"Ew" Serena frowned.

The game continued for another forty-five minutes. Blair eventually managed to take North America from Nate and then she and Chuck took over his remaining territories as well as Serena's. They then fought each other over Asia and Nate got them to agree that whoever won that continent would win the game. Eventually Blair won the continent and with an excited victory cry looked up from the board to show off her win to the others. When she did she noticed that both Nate and Serena had left the table already and only she and Chuck were left.

"Where did everybody go?" she asked.

"Nate and Serena walked off ten minutes ago during the intense battle for Siam" Chuck said, beginning to gather the cards.

"They did?"

"You're just like a little girl when you get invested in a game" Chuck said in a friendly tone. "You're so engrossed in what you're doing you barely notice the world around you."

"I enjoy winning" Blair said. "Speaking of, the others should get in here and bow to the new ruler of the world. It's only fitting. I haven't won at a single game in ages, I deserve my due appreciation."

"_You_ haven't won at a game in _ages_?" Chuck snorted, putting the deck of cards back in the game's box. "Somehow I find that hard to believe."

Blair thought back on the last twenty-or-so times she had played any games. '_Go Fish_' with Sebastian, '_Memory_' with Sebastian, '_Fish Pond_' with Sebastian. He had quite the temper sometimes and he hated losing even more than Blair did so she always let him win when they played anything.

"Let's just say I appear to have met my match" she said with a little smile.

"Have you now?" Chuck replied, eyebrow raised.

"Are you guys done playing?" Nate asked, walking over. "That janitor I spoke of before just called. He got off a few hours ago but couldn't hand over the keys then for whatever reason. He wants me to come get them now so I'll be heading out."

"I'll go with you" Chuck said, getting up from his seat.

Blair got up as well and followed them to the door. Dan said something to her but she wasn't paying attention.

"Call me right away if you find anything out okay?" she said.

"Don't worry Blair" Nate smiled. "You'll know what we know when we know it."

"See you tomorrow" Chuck said and left together with Nate.

"So" Dan said, clapping his hands together. "Who's up for another board game? I'll go get '_Scrabble_'."

"Forget it Humphrey" Blair said. "I'm board game bored. I think I'll just get my stuff and head back home."

"It's only like eight o'clock" Dan protested.

"I'll go with you B" Serena said, getting up from the couch. "We can share a cab."

"What, no one wants to stay?" Dan said, looking dejected.

"See you tomorrow Humphrey" Blair said, grabbing her ruined Chanel bag.

"Goodnight" Serena said, holding the door open for Blair before following her out in the hallway and closing the door behind her.

"It's not raining still, is it?" Blair asked as they walked towards the main entrance.

"I think it is" Serena said.

"I hate the damn rain" Blair mumbled. "It messes up your hair, ruins your makeup not to mention your clothing… There is not a single good thing about rain."

Serena chuckled at Blair's view of the world. Neither of them said anything further until they were shivering in the backseat of a cab heading back to Manhattan.

"So what are your plans for the rest of the evening?" Serena asked. "Sit by the phone and wait for Nate to call?"

"Wouldn't that be a déjà vu from early high school?" Blair remarked, looking out the window.

"If you're not doing anything special… maybe I could come up for a while?"

Blair turned and looked at Serena.

"You… You want to?"

"Yeah. I mean… if you want me to."

Blair smiled slightly.

"Okay."

* * *

><p>"So where is this janitor of yours?" Chuck asked, suppressing a yawn.<p>

"He'll be here" Nate said patiently. "You didn't have to come along if you didn't want to."

"I can only spend so much time at that loft before I develop a skin rash."

He reached over to the mini-fridge which he always kept fully-stocked and grabbed a small bottle of wine. He offered it to Nate who shook his head. Chuck closed the refrigerator door and decided not to bother with a glass, opening the bottle and taking a chug.

"I love how you have your alcoholic binges with style" Nate commented. "You know most guys our age have a beer when they're hanging out with someone."

"I'm not most guys our age" Chuck said. "Thankfully."

"It's been quite a while since I last saw you drinking in your limo on a regular evening" Nate noted. "What's going on?"

"I'm bored" Chuck said. "I had crappy dinner in a rundown loft and was then forced to play board games. I need the alcohol, trust me."

"Uh-huh" Nate said. "Hey Blair's gotten really haggard over the years hasn't she? She looks closer to thirty-five than twenty-five."

Chuck shot him a dark glare.

"She doesn't look a day over twenty."

Nate smirked.

"Eagerly defending her" he noted.

"Now you're just being obnoxious" Chuck said. He looked out the window trying to see if the janitor had appeared yet but it was hard to see much of anything in the rain at this hour. "If this guy doesn't come within ten minutes I'm aborting the mission."

"Again, you didn't have to tag along."

"I'll admit to having an ulterior motive for joining you" Chuck said. He looked over at Nate with a thoughtful expression. "I've been observing you and my sister over the last month or so" he lied. "I was under the impression that something was… brewing. The whole thing slipped my mind the other day at the club or I wouldn't have asked you to pick up the bartender. I'm sorry if I ruined anything between you and Serena."

"There's no me and Serena" Nate said.

"You sure?"

"I would be stupid to give that another chance" Nate said. "I tried it once in high school and I got blown off. I tried it again in college and while she seemed really into me for a while eventually it turned out she preferred Dan. I'm done chasing Serena. It's never going to happen between she and I. Or if it does it will soon be over, like last time."

"Right" Chuck nodded. "Do you love her?"

"That is neither here nor there" Nate said.

"Because it seems to me that she's more sincere in her advances this time than she was back when we were teenagers" Chuck continued, taking another sip from his wine bottle. "If you still feel the same way about her as you did back then perhaps it's worth taking the risk?"

"Come on man, you know Serena" Nate said. "She's as fickle as they come."

"This coming from a guy who's had more girlfriends than a character on a soap opera" Chuck remarked.

"My feelings for Serena have been consistent since the Sheppard wedding" Nate said. "Hers for me on the other hand?"

"Wouldn't you rather look back on your life and regret the choices you made than regret the risks you never took?"

"Great advice man" Nate snorted. "Am I talking to Chuck Bass or Dan Humphrey?"

"Ouch. Like I said I believe Serena's feelings for you are stronger now than they were before. The two of you have seemed much more synched than you did before and it's been hard not noticing how bothered she's been since you hooked up with bartender girl."

"I'll think about it" Nate said. "What about yourself? You've been cool as a cucumber all week. Dare I hope that Blair's return on the scene changes nothing?"

"Can we not talk about Blair?" Chuck sighed.

"Chuck" Nate said firmly.

"No not much has changed" Chuck said. "Not much _will_ change. Despite what she says I'm betting she will go back to France once this mess is over and done with." He gazed out the window and had some more wine. "Her return to the city has made me think though. It's been almost four years since we were last together, all of us. What the hell happened? I mean is this… all? I feel like I haven't gotten anywhere in those four years."

"Only you could say something like that" Nate replied. "You've expanded your business to three hotels, you're becoming a name in the business world, you've found a good relationship. In my book that seems like a lot."

"You're right about the business part."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"I've been with Emmy for three and a half years. I don't even officially live with her. Doesn't that strike you as weird?"

"You spend what, twenty-five nights a month together? The rest one of you is usually out of town on a business trip. I think that constitutes as living together, no matter where your mail is delivered."

"I always saw myself as either being an eternal playboy or settling down fairly early" Chuck said, looking over at Nate. "I know that sounds hilarious coming from me. I always wanted a real family and if my father couldn't provide me with that I was going to create one for myself. When I was with Blair I was one hundred percent sure we would be married shortly after twenty and having at least three kids by thirty."

"So?"

"I've been with Emmy for over three years. I haven't proposed to her yet. Had she…" He trailed off and made a face knowing Nate wouldn't like hearing what came next. "Had she been Blair I would have asked her a long time ago. I know you don't approve of that but it's the truth Nathaniel."

"So then ask her."

"There's a _reason_ I haven't gotten down on one knee yet. Unfortunately I can't put my finger to what it is. It just… doesn't feel like we're ready for that."

"Chuck you're twenty-four. Emmy's twenty-five. Did it occur to you that you might not be meant to feel ready at this age?"

"I want to have children" Chuck said. "I want a family. I can't explain to myself why I haven't begun to build one with Emmy."

"Again, you're in your mid-twenties."

"But shouldn't I be _wanting_ to have children with my girlfriend?" Chuck asked. "I'm not saying that I _don't_ want us to have any but I'm not hoping she will get pregnant. I keep hesitating about taking the big steps with Emmy and I can't figure out why."

"If you ask me it sounds healthy to not move so fast" Nate said. "Why rush? Look man, I know there's still a part of you that hangs on to the memory of Blair. Maybe it's a good thing that she's back in our lives. You can finally find closure from her and move on."

"There will always be a part of me that wonders what could have been with Blair and me if things hadn't gotten so screwed up."

"I know you loved her" Nate said. "You're better off with Emmy though."

"I was happy with Blair" Chuck pointed out. "Very happy."

"I know. For less than a year. Seems like there's been an awful amount of hurt for only a short period of happiness. I think you and Blair were great together for a while but you got to a point where all you did was cut each other deeper. It wasn't healthy. I know your love for Emmy is not as intense as what you felt for Blair. That doesn't mean Blair is the woman who will make you the happiest in the long run." He looked out the window and spotted the janitor. "There he is. Come on, let's go."

* * *

><p>"So be honest Blair" Serena said, sitting down on Blair's bed with a mug of cappuccino. "Will you be staying? Or are you gone as soon as this whole thing is over?"<p>

"I would like to stay" Blair said, taking a sip from her own coffee.

"Would like to? What would be stopping you?"

"Not much I guess" Blair said. "I will admit though that it's strange to be back. I guess I never realized just how much I would miss out on being over in France."

"That sounds like you" Serena giggled. "It probably never crossed your mind that life goes on without Blair Waldorf."

"I missed you, you know" Blair said.

Serena was surprised at the sudden confession. She slowly put her mug down on Blair's nightstand and hugged her knees.

"I missed you too" she said. "Once I got over being mad at you for disappearing like that. Well, I guess you know where my mind was at. Ironic how we've now both run off without telling our best friend where we were going or why we were going."

"I will explain it all one day" Blair said. "I promise. I just have to do it in my own time."

"I've longed to talk to you so many times" Serena said. "About all kinds of things. You changed your phone number."

"Not so much by choice" Blair said. "It was just easier to get a French number after a while. I was going to call you several times but after a while it just got weird and I was worried you wouldn't want to talk to me. I wouldn't blame you if that were the case."

"You were wrong."

Blair smiled behind her coffee mug.

"Maybe we can… start to talk to each other again? About the kind of stuff we used to?"

"I would like that" Serena said. "I'm really curious to know more about what you've been doing in France all this time. Is there a man in your life? Did you finish school in France?"

"There's not much of interest to tell" Blair said, cringing inwardly at the half-lie. There was lots of interest only she couldn't tell Serena yet. "Hearing what you've been up to is probably ten times more interesting. There's no ring on your finger yet. Don't tell me Lily van der Woodsen's daughter hasn't even been engaged yet?"

"Sadly not yet" Serena giggled.

"And no man you would like to pop your engagement cherry with?" Blair asked with eyebrows raised and took another sip of coffee.

Serena giggled again and felt a little nervous. This was a golden opportunity to talk to Blair about the Nate thing. Yet it felt weird to open up to her about something like that so long past when they had been close.

"I think I'm in love with Nate…" she said tentatively.

Blair was silent for a moment, taking it in.

"Okay."

"I don't know how he feels about me."

"To Nate you've been the one that got away" Blair said. "His feelings for you were very genuine in the past. Trust me I know. I tried everything in my power to make him forget about you and love me instead."

"That was years ago. Things change."

"Not everything does. Have you told him how you feel?"

"I'm afraid to" Serena said. "Nate has been someone I felt safe admitting feelings to. I knew he liked me more than I liked him so I wouldn't get shot down. Now I just don't know and it's scaring me."

"You guys were good together" Blair said. "Nate hasn't forgotten that."

"I also don't think he's forgotten how we ended."

"I have to ask you Serena" Blair said. "Are you _sure_ about your feelings for him? If you are then you need to tell him. However if you're not sure then you shouldn't say anything. You don't want to lose his friendship."

"I don't know that I've ever really _been_ sure…" Serena said. "Not like you were about Chuck or Louis."

Blair cringed. She had been sure about Chuck but Louis was a different story. She had been sure she wanted the fairytale but the man was less important.

"Being with Nate back when we were teenagers…" Serena said in a musing tone. "It was… completely different than anything I'd experienced up to that point. He was so… Well I don't have to tell _you_ what it's like to be with Nate."

"The Lily Allen song '_Not Fair_' comes to mind."

"Nate's a really good guy" Serena said, ignoring the comment. "I wanted to love him more than I actually did. You just can't _will_ yourself to feel more for someone than you do."

Blair nodded, knowing far too well from experience what Serena meant.

"Part of me worries that maybe I'm right back where I was back then. Maybe I just want to be with Nate because he's this sweet, caring guy who's also one of my best friends?"

"Well is that all you feel?" Blair asked gently. "If you're in love with someone you usually know it."

"Do you?"

"I think with your history with Nate you would" Blair said. "I think the two of you would be great together. But you have to be sure you want it."

Serena nodded.

"Yeah…" She smiled slightly. "Thanks B."

"Any time S." She finished her coffee and put the mug down on the floor. "So. Tell me about this Emmy person."

Serena raised an eyebrow. Blair made a face and grabbed a pillow to hug.

"No sense pretending she doesn't exist. If I'm going to stay in New York I suppose I ought to know more about her. She makes Chuck happy?"

"They've been together for over three years now" Serena said. "Chuck wouldn't stay that long with someone who didn't make him happy. She's not really who I expected him to fall for but she does seem to placate him and I think he needs that."

"What do you mean?" Blair said. "About not expecting him to fall for her, I mean."

"Well… You remember Eva right?"

"Much as I try not to."

"She reminds me of Eva to a degree. Mild mannered, sweet, docile… She's more fun than Eva was though. She can really go crazy at times, especially when you get some alcohol in her. When she's like that, more spirited you know, then I see why Chuck lo…"

"Why Chuck loves her" Blair finished the sentence.

"I'm sorry Blair. You still have feelings for him, right? The way you look at him sometimes… I know it's not easy hearing about your ex whom you're not completely over being in love with someone else."

Blair swallowed hard and hugged the pillow tighter. It wasn't easy. She wanted to believe it wasn't true. But if it was she had to start accepting it. If not else so that she knew to which extent Emmy was a rival.

"So she's fun on occasion" she summed Emmy up. "And wild in bed."

"What makes you think that?" Serena asked, looking puzzled.

"Chuck may find some enjoyment in being with a docile woman out in public but trust me, if she's not spunky in the bedroom he wouldn't stay with her for a month."

"He seems to really care for her" Serena said. "But if you still love him…"

"If I still love him then what?"

"I don't expect Blair Waldorf to sit back and not fight for the one she loves" Serena said. "I like Emmy. I do. I know Nate thinks Chuck is better off with her because things have been smooth with them and there's hardly been any drama to speak of. Me, I don't think he should settle. If Emmy is his true love then I'll support him and I'll welcome her to the family as my sister. But honestly I don't see Chuck being truly happy with what he's currently got. At least not in the long run. I saw him with you and I saw you with him and neither of you ever seemed happier than you did when you were together. Not by a long shot. He very rarely talks about you and I don't know if that's because he loves you or because he's over you. If he does still love you then I think he would have a much greater shot at happiness with you than with Emmy. If you still love him I think you should go get your man. As long as you guys still love each other I think you need one another to be truly happy."

Blair smiled, trying to hide how she was beaming inside. Serena's words were exactly the encouragement she needed but she didn't want to seem too eager. Not until she knew how Chuck felt. Serena was right though. Chuck remained her best shot at happiness and she should be entitled to pursue him. If he didn't love her back it was up to him to turn her down. If Emmy was his great love then she had nothing to worry about no matter what Blair said or did. Judging by Emmy's reactions this morning she did feel completely safe but she had never gone up against Blair Waldorf.

"I think Chuck and me… is a story that has yet to come to an end."

"Then you should let him know that" Serena grinned. "Perhaps you will find another reason to stay."

Blair giggled. It felt amazing to be having talks like this with her best friend again. She wanted to ask Serena to stay for the night but Sebastian would be calling tomorrow morning again. No amount of re-bonding with her best friend was worth missing even a minute on the phone with her son over. Besides, once the truth was out she could have all the sleepovers with Serena that she wanted.

* * *

><p>"What a lovely waste of time that was" Chuck sighed as they stepped back out into the rain outside Malcolm's office building.<p>

"At least now we know there's nothing there of interest" Nate pointed out.

"Fabulous. Let's go home. And park you in front of a Bond movie with a better theme song. I'm thinking '_On Her Majesty's Secret Service_'. It's fitting for our current situation, I like the music and the worst thing that can happen is you whistling the melody all day tomorrow." Nate stopped him with a hand on the arm. "What?"

"See that other limo parked over there?" Nate said. "It must be the same one Dan and I saw yesterday."

"I would comment on the lack of discretion in parking out in a limo but that would be Humphrey levels of hypocrisy" Chuck said.

"What do we do?" Nate asked.

"You go wait in the car" Chuck said. "I'm going over to check the license plate."

He nudged Nate towards their car and picked up his phone from his coat pocket. He had been meaning to call Emmy anyway and let her know he would be spending the night at his own apartment. He might as well make good use of the call and use it as a cover.

While talking to his girlfriend he strolled casually down the street. As he got closer to the other limo he made a mental note of the license plate and hoped he would be able to remember it. He walked past the limo and continued to walk for another hundred meters before turning. On his way back he noticed that there was no one in the driver's seat. Emmy was in the middle of a rant about how nothing was going as she wanted it to at work but he had stopped listening. The window on the passenger seat was slightly rolled down and it gave him an idea.

He let Emmy continue to talk without making any comments himself and slowly approached the limo. He reached inside his pocket and found the other cellphone he was carrying. Blair had had Dorota buy phones for all of them in case they needed to go stealth and not contact each other on their listed phone numbers. They hadn't had any use for them yet but now it came in handy. As discreetly as possible Chuck slipped the phone through the open window and let it fall down on the floor of the limo. Then he wrapped up his conversation and hurried back to his own car.

Shivering he opened the door and slid into his seat.

"So?" Nate asked.

"_And he strikes_" Chuck replied in song. "_Pa-da-ba-da-bow! Like thunderball._"

* * *

><p>Thanks for reading! Please review.<p> 


	8. Chapter 8

The beginning of this chapter might be suited for an M rating… I pretty much _never_ write anything even remotely smutty so bear with me. Also the scene directly following is one I'm not very happy with but I couldn't figure out how to change it for the better so in the end I just left it as is.

In other news (well, pseudo-news since I've already told some of you reviewers and made mentions of it in some ANs) this story is being split into two fanfics. In my outlines the second half is much less NJBC-heavy than the first and the title and original premise don't really go with that half. Basically it feels like a separate story in many ways. So this first fic will end by chapter ten and the story will continue on from there in a companion piece/sequel. Needless to say things won't be wrapped up in a neat bow when the tenth chapter of this fic is posted but I won't leave you guys hanging, I promise =)

With that said, I hope you enjoy the drama that is about to unfold.

* * *

><p><em>Blair arched her back, bent her head backwards and gasped. For a moment she didn't move a muscle. Then she tilted her head down and met his eyes, slowly moving and finding a rhythm. His eyes were on her, all over her, moving from one spot to another as if he couldn't decide which part of her he was most eager to watch. It made her smile. It made her feel sexy and desirable. He had always made her feel that way.<em>

_She was naked except for her knee-high stockings and her black boots. He was much more clothed. His pants were somewhere below his knees, his shirt unbuttoned but still on. Her hands were on his chest, bracing her weight, enjoying the familiar feeling of his skin, his muscles and the hairs on his chest. He was laying rather uncomfortably on one of the armchairs and at the back of her head she knew his back must be killing him but it didn't matter. All that mattered was her desperation to have him, to feel him, to be one with him and she knew he was feeling the same thing. He was mumbling something she couldn't make out. His hands were on her breasts, thumbs circling her nipples. She moved her right hand to grab the top of the chair above his head and her left gripped his shoulder tight. Her legs would start to cramp soon, she could feel it. She wanted to reach her climax before then. At the same time she didn't want it to end._

_His hands moved slowly down her body, landing on her hips. He grabbed her firmly and aided her, lifting her up, pulling her down. Through her haze of lust and passion and pleasure she smiled at how in sync they were. It was as if they had never been doing anything else. In a way maybe they hadn't._

_She closed her eyes and moaned as she reached her peak_. _Suddenly she felt herself being lifted off him and she opened her eyes, her jaw falling in surprise. He got up, shrugged out of his shirt and kicked off his pants. He then grabbed her and laid her down in front of him on the divan. She smiled and wrapped her legs around him, pulling him as close as she could._

_For the first few seconds he was purely business. Reclaiming her, knowing she had been with Louis. Then he leaned over her and started to mumble again. She caught a word here and there but wasn't really paying attention to what he was saying. His right hand trailed over her body. She was vaguely aware that she had let her left arm rest above her head and she felt his hand caressing it until their hands met and their fingers clasped. Blair wrapped her right arm around him as best she could, high on the moment and the intense feeling of love and connection. He was a hand holder but he hadn't always been comfortable with people knowing it._

_His mouth met hers and they kissed lovingly, tenderly, passionately. She could never go back to Louis. Never in a million years could she give this up._

* * *

><p>"Blair?"<p>

Her name being spoken loudly and her shoulder being rather forcibly shaken woke Blair from her daydream. Slightly confused she looked over and noticed Dan. She groaned inwardly. He had a very annoying tendency to show up and ruin some of the best moments.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"I think a better question is what are you doing? I said your name several times. Where were you just now?"

Blair didn't answer. It embarrassed her a little how often she thought back on her last intimate rendezvous with Chuck and the conception of their child. It was a memory she treasured and she was definitely not about to share it with Dan.

Dan frowned with concern and took a seat by her vanity. She had seemed so distracted these past few days and even more so this morning. She had a heavy burden weighing on her and he wanted to help her in any way he could. His feelings for her seemed to deepen every day and he deeply wished she would let him hold her close and whisper comforting words to her. She was so vulnerable and he was worried she might get drawn back in to Chuck and try to find comfort in _his_ arms. Chuck was neither right for her nor good for her and Dan wondered why she so stubbornly refused to see that. She had a much better guy right in front of her and maybe it was time she really knew it.

"Are you alright?" he asked softly.

"I'm actually in a wonderful mood" Blair said to his surprise, and the smile on her face seemed to confirm it. "Finally Malcolm is getting taken down. We have a plan ready to be set in motion and Nate called me last night to tell me they've found a way to track the limo you guys spotted the other day so perhaps that will tell us more about what's going on behind the scenes. The threat of Sebastian being exposed to the world will go away and I can focus on telling Chuck the truth."

"I must object" Dan said. "You know how I feel on this issue."

"It's been duly noted. About a million times. Sometimes I wonder if you're even aware that it is my decision to make and you don't get a say."

"Blair nobody's input in this situation should be more valuable than mine" Dan argued. "I'm the only one outside your immediate family and Malcolm who knows what you're hiding. I'm the only one who knows Sebastian."

"Only because you paid me a surprise visit when I was too pregnant to conceal it" Blair reminded him. "I didn't confide in you out of choice."

Her words were down-putting but it didn't bother him. She always put up a big fight when she didn't want to admit to something. The more she struggled against an idea the more truth there tended to be to it. He didn't have Chuck's ability to tell when she was lying but he believed he knew her mind better than any of her other friends did at this point.

He got up and walked over to her, sitting down beside her on the bed.

"I think it's time you and I had a conversation" he said.

"What?" she said, wondering what on earth he was on about. All they ever seemed to do was have conversations.

Dan took her hands tenderly and looked deeply into her eyes.

"Blair… You can't be unaware of my feelings for you."

Blair frowned and felt a touch alarmed.

"Humphrey what on earth are you talking about?"

"I… love you" Dan said earnestly.

Blair groaned and pulled her hands free.

"Humphrey don't do this to me" she complained and got up.

Dan blinked confusedly.

"I wasn't sure what to expect… Except I know I wasn't expecting _that_" he blinked.

"Don't I have enough on my hands with a secret love child and some guy trying to expose said child for some reason we don't yet know? The last thing I need is to deal with your misguided affection."

"What makes you think it's misguided?"

"Do me a favor and just pretend you never said the thing you said" Blair said. "God knows I will."

"Blair" Dan said, slowly rising. "I'm not going to forget it. I'm not going to let you forget it. I love you. And I think you love me too even if you won't admit it, even to yourself."

"What?"

"You're scared" Dan said gently and moved closer to her. "Your mind is a mess. Your heart is a mess. Everything that's happened from the moment we first kissed all those years ago has been… a mess. I think your feelings for me are stronger than you want to admit to yourself. You've never known simple love, not _real_ simple love. You're afraid that if there's no drama the relationship won't be interesting. If you look into your heart I think you will find you love me too."

Blair looked into his eyes, struggling to find words for almost a minute.

"Are you _high_?" she then managed.

"Don't snark at me" Dan said calmly. "Snark has always been your way of trying to keep me away when I get too close. Don't do it this time."

"I cannot believe this" Blair said in an exasperated tone. "You're not in love with me, you moron. And I certainly have no romantic feelings for you."

Dan looked taken aback.

"Blair I am putting my heart out there here. You can't tell me how I feel."

"You're not in love with me" Blair insisted. "You're just swooning over me because I'm in a tough spot right now and that makes me someone you can save. That's been your thing for as long as I've known you. A damsel in distress is like… catnip to you. The moment this crisis is over and I'm back on my feet and in full control your feelings for me will go away."

"That's absurd" Dan frowned.

"Really? Have you been thinking about me all the time every day for the past few years? Daydreamt about me non-stop? Written '_Mr. Blair Waldorf_' in the margins of your diary? I was aware you had a crush on me back when I was pregnant with Sebastian. It seemed to pass rather quickly once I got my life in something resembling order. Now I'm in a vulnerable position and your feelings have returned. Thank you Humphrey but I have no need for a knight in needs-to-be-shined armor."

"You always try to act like you're so strong" Dan said gently. "It's okay to be weak every once in a while too. You think that by loving me you would be weak but you and I could be something really great. Can you honestly tell me that you feel _nothing_ for me?"

Blair looked him sternly in the eye.

"Dan. Do we have to continue this conversation? Can't we just leave it be?"

"I know you're scared."

"For God's sake Humphrey!" Blair said. "I am _not_ in love with you. And you know that. You know there's only one man for me."

"Chuck is your safety-net" Dan argued. "You cling to him because it gives you a good excuse not to move forward."

"No" Blair said, shaking her head. "I cling to him because when I wake up in the morning he is the first thought I have. When I go to sleep at night he is the last thought that I have, and he is on my mind more times than anyone can count in-between. I cling to him because nobody has ever given me a fraction of the happiness that he has. I cling to him because he understands me better than I understand myself. And because I can _feel_ it when he enters a room, because I _ache_ when I'm not near him, because when we touch I get a feeling that no words can describe."

"To me that sounds like a romantic daydream" Dan said. "Something that exists only in your mind, constructed during all the years you spent apart. It won't hold up in reality."

"Funny. That's how I would describe the feelings you think you have for me. I don't want to hurt you Dan but you must realize that for me there's only Chuck. There's never really been anyone else since he first stole my heart. What happened between me and Louis, a guy who was otherwise perfect for me, is proof of that."

"But-"

"Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same."

Dan frowned.

"Huh?"

"Never mind" Blair sighed, deciding not to elaborate on the reference.

"I think you will be making the biggest mistake of your life if you pursue Chuck" Dan said. "For one he's in a relationship. For another he's brought you nothing but misery."

"He gave me Sebastian" Blair countered icily. "Dan I like you but not when you talk about Chuck and me as if you had any idea what we were like. You could never understand what we were to each other because you've never experienced something like it. Based on the love stories you wrote in your book you can't even grasp what a connection like that is about."

"I understand that true love should not make you miserable."

Blair's eyes darkened.

"You know what, forget it. You can leave now. Consider yourself superfluous for the rest of this mission."

"Blair."

"I do not love you and I do not believe you love me either. Until you get that through your thick skull and until you show a smidgen of respect for the man I do love you can stay away."

"Blair I am your friend. I am your _only_ real friend."

"You are nothing but a placeholder" Blair said icily. "Chuck, Serena and Nate would help me cover up a murder if I asked them to. You would rat me out to the police."

"That analogy doesn't prove them to be better friends than me" Dan argued. "I know you and I think I know what's going on here. You're feeling threatened because you're feelings for me are stronger than you want to admit and now you're pushing me away."

"I'm going to be physically pushing you out the door if you don't leave on your own within the next ten seconds."

Dan sighed and walked towards the door. He stopped and turned at the threshold, seeing the angry look in Blair's eyes. He was upset that she had chosen to cling to her delusions about Chuck but he wasn't completely surprised by it. He hoped she would snap out of this soon, before Chuck had a chance to hurt her again. He didn't believe they had any real connection, at least not anymore. He knew he had once thought the two of them were made for each other but that was before he had seen the real Blair. The real Blair belonged with someone way better than Chuck. Hopefully she would come to see that. Hopefully knowing how Dan felt about her would make her come to see how great they could be together and dare to return those feelings.

"You know where to find me" he said. "When you need me… and you will need me… just call. I'm not angry."

"I know you're not you idiot; _I'm_ the one who's angry!"

"I love you" Dan said. "I'll be here for you when everything comes crashing down."

"If you loved me you wouldn't do this to me" Blair said. "I need a friend on my side who knows about Sebastian and you're the only one who fits that bill. I cannot believe you're making a bad situation even worse by laying this on me now."

Without answering he left. Blair sighed heavily and ran her hands through her hair, exasperated. Her morning had started wonderfully and now it was a mess again.

* * *

><p>The former foursome sat together in Chuck's limo across the street from Malcolm's office. Blair had done her best to shake off her talk with Dan earlier in the day and focused on the upcoming confrontation. The plan was to follow Malcolm to where he had lunch and confront him there but he seemed to be running late.<p>

"Doesn't anybody who works in this building do anything on time?" Chuck yawned. "If this takes much longer I'm sending Serena out to buy us snacks."

"You and your impending cholesterol collapse will have to wait" Serena said, moving a little closer to Nate with the excuse of trying to look out the window. "I'm not going to risk missing a single moment of this takedown."

"I can't believe this will all be over today" Nate said. "Our lives can go back to normal."

"The guy's clearly not going out for lunch" Blair said. "We have his home address. We should go make sure he's not at his apartment. I can send Dorota to check."

"June says he only rarely works from home" Nate objected.

"Speaking of, I think now is the perfect time for you to end things with her" Chuck said. "Go on inside and talk to her. While you're there, check and see if Malcolm is on his way out. If we're really out of luck he might be eating at the office."

Obediently Nate got out of the car and headed across the street and inside the building. Fifteen minutes later he returned and made an apologetic face as he got back inside the limo. Serena nudged him to speak when he didn't say anything for the first few seconds.

"Malcolm didn't come in to work today."

"It's amazing how much information about him this bartender is willing to divulge" Serena noted.

"She was in a spectacular mood today because he hadn't shown up" Nate said. "Which I then promptly ruined by breaking things off with her."

"Then he must be at home" Blair said. "I'm calling Dorota. She's waiting a few blocks away from where he lives and prepared to go over there and pretend to be a member of a religious cult hoping to save some more souls. She can make sure he _is_ at home and then distract him while we head over."

"I'm disappointed" Serena said. "All our hard work and now he's not around?"

"Make the call" Chuck told Blair. He then leaned forward and addressed the driver. "Dave! Next stop along the way please."

They only got a few blocks before Dorota called Blair back to inform her that nobody was home at Malcolm's place. Blair relayed the information to the others, fuming with anger and frustration.

"Not much we can do but postpone the takedown" Chuck said.

"I want this over with _today_ Bass!" Blair cried. "By tomorrow he might have exposed my secret already. He might even be doing that as we speak and that's why we can't get a hold of him!"

"If he was going public he would be doing so from his office" Chuck pointed out calmly. "If he's gone public _already_ there's nothing we can do about it anyway."

"Take me home then" Blair sighed. "I guess there are a few things I could do with my afternoon."

It was still another half hour before Sebastian's bedtime. She smiled slightly thinking about the chance to talk to him one more time before he went to bed. Chuck had his driver drop her off at the penthouse and once she was out of the car he turned to the other two.

"This is more than a little strange" he said. "On the very day when we're going to go after him he disappears."

"He didn't _disappear_" Nate tried to argue.

"Somebody tipped him off" Chuck said. "I didn't want to say anything in front of Blair because she'd worry. The three of us are spending the rest of the day digging deeper into this and this time we're using my private detectives to help us out."

"Blair's not going to like that" Serena objected.

"Blair does not get a vote" Chuck said. His phone beeped and he checked the message he had just gotten.

"_If you want to find me so bad come and see me._"

He frowned. He didn't recognize the number. A second later he got another text message with a hotel and a room number. Nate and Serena studied him with interest, noticing the expression on his face after reading the messages.

"Who was it?" Nate asked.

"I'm not sure" Chuck said. "I'm heading to the Four Seasons to find out."

"The Four Seasons?"

"As for the pair of you, go back to our place and start sleuthing. I'll call you as soon as I know anything."

Nate and Serena shared a look but didn't argue. They had both been hoping to have the rest of the day off since Operation Takedown had been put off but clearly that wasn't in the cards. It was easier to just do as Chuck ordered.

* * *

><p>Chuck opened the hotel room door and tentatively stepped inside, wondering who he was about to meet. He probably shouldn't have gone alone considering he had no idea just what kind of mess Blair was really in, but knowing Emmy this could be one of her sex games set up to give them a moment together in the middle of their hectic schedules. If that were the case it would definitely put a damper on the mood if he were flanked by Nate and Serena.<p>

"Nephew!" Jack Bass' voice cheerfully exclaimed, putting all hopes of an encounter with his girlfriend to rest.

"Jack?" Chuck echoed, completely baffled, looking around to see where the voice was coming from.

His uncle came walking in from an adjacent room with a big smile on his face and his arms extended.

"It's been too long since our last family reunion, hasn't it?" Jack grinned. "How about a hug for your favorite uncle?"

Chuck just stared at him. Part of him was trying to take in the sight of his uncle and another part of him was berating himself for not having figured out Jack might be involved much sooner. He took a few steps further inside the room and continued to stare wordlessly at his uncle. Jack shrugged when he wasn't offered a hug and went to sit down on the couch.

"Have a seat" he said. "What a pleasant get-together, won't you agree? Let's chat for a bit, catch up."

"Jack what do you want?" Chuck asked flatly.

"Just thought I'd return your cellphone. Really discreet maneuver there."

"Awful lot of trouble to go through just to return a phone. Especially when I can easily replace it. I have the Bass billions after all."

"Not to worry Nephew" Jack grinned, putting a cigar in his mouth and lighting it. "This is not a ploy to get money from you."

"You're the one who's behind all of this" Chuck stated. "That much is obvious. What I don't get is why. Blair and I broke up years ago; she's not even in my life anymore. Going after her does nothing for you."

"You'd rather I went after Emily?" Jack said, eyebrow raised. "Because I could if you want me to."

"It's Emmy" Chuck corrected. "She stays out of this." He walked closer but didn't sit. "So what now? Are you going to tell me what it is you want or will I first have to listen to you teasing and taunting me for an hour?"

"Aw, you've grown boring Chuckster" Jack said.

"You've grown convoluted. Your previous schemes have all been fairly straight-forward. What's the point in sending a sleazy pseudo-journalist after Blair? Why get him to blackmail her in exchange for this information he has? What, were you getting half the cut?"

"I don't need money" Jack said. "Malcolm does. Nasty little drug problem he's managed to get. I told him he could keep Blair's three million if she actually paid up but I told her the odds of that were not in his favor."

"Then what's in it for him?"

"He'll get his reward."

Chuck rolled his eyes at the cryptic comment.

"Oh come now Nephew" Jack smirked, puffing on his cigar. "You used to have some sense of humor."

"I don't get it" Chuck said. "You never do anything without a motive. What's the point of all this?"

Jack leaned forward and put his cigar out on an ashtray on the table. He looked up at Chuck and grinned.

"Actually there was one more thing I wanted to give you in addition to the phone."

"Forget about the damn phone" Chuck said. "Just tell me what you're after here so we can wrap this up."

"I've already told you, I don't want money."

"Then what?"

"To see you suffer. Same old, same old. I'm very fond of tradition, as you're well aware from childhood."

"Why go after Blair then?"

"If I can't find dirt on you she's always a good fallback. She may not be your girlfriend anymore but hurting her is hurting you by proxy."

"Feel free to make some sense, Jack."

Jack reached over to a large manila envelope sitting on the table in front of him. He picked it up and held it out to Chuck.

"I got you some goodies."

"Thanks but no thanks."

"It's a real treat."

"I've given up on sugar" Chuck said dryly.

"Judging by your waistline I highly doubt it" Jack snickered.

"This conversation is over" Chuck said. "Whatever you're paying Malcolm we both know I can pay him thrice that much without breaking a sweat. The next time you want to mess with me why don't you come after _me_ for a change?"

Jack opened the envelope and took out a document.

"Aren't you the _least_ bit curious what your precious Blair has been up to these past few years?" he asked.

"You know me Jack. If I wanted to know what she was doing I would have a PI find out for me. I'm far too intense in my affections for those I love to stay away. Anything I don't know about Blair is something I don't care to find out."

He was bluffing but he knew it would work. Jack could never comprehend the reasons why Chuck hadn't kept a close eye on Blair. Ignoring his uncle he walked towards the door, annoyed that this whole thing had been nothing more than an attempt by Jack Bass to cause trouble.

"You got me there" Jack said. "I guess you don't care about her anymore. Never thought I'd see the day. Better tell your latest girlfriend edition to watch her back. Looks like I'll _have_ to target her next."

"It's about time you got a restraining order against you" Chuck grumbled.

"Like it would be my first" Jack snorted. "By the way, guess who went and had a baby?"

Chuck stopped at the door and turned with a disgusted look on his face.

"Some poor soul has been born with _you_ as their father?" he said, repulsed by the idea.

"Hey" Jack said, sounding offended for the first time. "There's nothing wrong with my gene pool. A kid could do a lot worse."

"Only if Skeletor is able to procreate with humans."

Jack smirked. The reference was dated but when Chuck was little Jack had often watched '_He-Man_' with him.

"Turns out though I'm not the one who became a parent" he said, holding the document out to Chuck. "The stork came with a special delivery for someone you know very well."

Chuck snatched the document from him, giving him an icy glare before turning his eyes to the piece of paper. It was a birth certificate. He didn't cast so much as a glance at the name of the person whose birth certificate he was holding, nor at the date of birth listed. His eyes went straight to the mother and father.

His face fell. Blair Cornelia Waldorf was listed as the mother. There couldn't be more than one woman in the world with that name. A quick look at the listed father told him the father was unknown, or at least not officially known. His mouth felt completely dry as he stared at Blair's name in disbelief.

"Wouldn't know it by looking at her, would you?" Jack smirked, leaning back on the couch and enjoying every moment. "Maybe she's hiding ugly stretch marks. I haven't gotten close enough or gotten her naked enough to check. Have you?"

"I should leave" Chuck said in what was barely more than a whisper.

"What's the matter Chucky?" Jack teased. "Not feeling well?"

Chuck turned and walked towards the door, letting the birth certificate drop to the floor as he went. Jack rose from his seat and held out the envelope.

"Wait!" he said. "You forgot the…"

Chuck ignored him, hurrying out the door without another word, letting it slam shut behind him.

* * *

><p>Wouldn't you know, plot development =) I'm not really pleased with this chapter myself but I much enjoyed writing the scene with Evil Uncle Jack. He's a real hoot to write and I'm starting to think I need more Jack stories. Anyways, let me know what <em>you<em> thought!


	9. Chapter 9

So now Chuck knows! And if you're wondering what he's going to do with that information you will soon find out.

I'm excited that people were happy to see Evil Uncle Jack! Especially since he's not done quite yet. He's got a few more scenes coming up before this story wraps up. Malcolm, however, will not be the subject of a big showdown.

* * *

><p>Blair felt a familiar feeling in the pit of her stomach as she approached the door to Chuck's office. Were those butterflies fluttering in her stomach? He had texted her and told her to come over. He needed to talk. She wasn't sure what he wanted to talk to her about but she couldn't quench the feeling of hope. It couldn't be about Malcolm since they already knew he wasn't around at the moment and their takedown and been postponed. Hopefully what he wanted to talk to her about was something of a much more personal nature.. She had gotten a highly unwanted proclamation of love earlier in the day. Getting a highly wanted one in the afternoon would be the perfect way to turn her day around.<p>

She smiled at Alice, his secretary, who told her she could go right in. Just like last time. Blair stopped outside his door and took a deep breath, letting the air out of her lungs before she opened the door and stepped inside.

Chuck was over by a window, looking out on New York with his hands in his back pockets. His suit jacket was on his chair and his sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He didn't usually roll his sleeves up like that but she liked it. She wondered if he did that often these days and added it to the ever growing list of things she wanted to rediscover about him.

He turned his head when he heard her enter. She smiled slightly at him, glad to be alone with him for a moment. Once she was inside the office he walked over to her and with a hand on her back urged her further inside the office.

"You will never guess who it turns out is behind all of this" he said.

Blair's jaw fell.

"You figured it out? How? Who?"

"John Bass Jr., aka sleazy Uncle Jack."

Blair gaped and blinked, trying to wrap her mind around this new piece of information. This was probably the last thing she had expected.

"Jack Bass? All of this was courtesy of your insane _uncle_?"

"Apparently going after you to get to me never gets old" Chuck sighed.

"Well what… What did he…"

Blair stuttered, unable to phrase a question or even a coherent thought. Jack was the last person in the world she had expected to be involved in any of this.

"Don't worry" Chuck said. "Jack's been neutralized. I don't think he's ever going to bother you again now that he's realized it's far from the most efficient way of getting under my skin."

"Oh."

"Finding Jack out and eliminating him as a problem is not the only thing I've done today" Chuck said. "I removed Malcolm's leverage. He no longer has anything on you and I am prepared to pay him a great deal of money to keep it that way."

"I could pay him myself if that's what-"

"Not enough to overbid Jack" Chuck said. "I know our whole quest was about _avoiding_ having to pay him… Trust me though it works out better this way."

Blair nodded slightly, too stunned by the information she had gotten to protest. She looked at Chuck who was standing by his desk rolling his sleeves back down. Something he had just said occurred to her and her heart started to pound. He finished with his sleeves and put his hands on his hips, glancing over at her.

"What did you mean when you say you took away Malcolm's leverage?" she asked.

Chuck looked at her in a way that made her heart sink to her shoes.

"I found out your secret" he said.

Panic welled up inside her. She had waited too long. Now he had found out on his own. What would she say? What would she do? There was nothing she _could_ say to justify her actions. The moment she had been dreading was here now and she had to face the music.

"Chuck I-"

"I know about your child" he said. "Blair I… I don't even know what to say."

"Neither do I" Blair said in a small voice.

"You poor thing."

Blair blinked. Why was his voice sounding sympathetic? Why was he not furiously angry with her?

"I can't even _imagine_… what you must have been through these past few years" he continued. "Having to carry that burden by yourself. Having to worry about your secret being exposed without feeling like you could confide in any of us these past few days. Now I understand why you stayed in France and didn't come back to New York."

"It has been difficult to not be able to talk about it with you guys. Dan's the only one who's known; he found out about it while I was still pregnant."

"Guess that explains why you've wanted to keep him around."

"Chuck I…"

"If Louis were ever to find out…"

Blair frowned, deeply confused over what was going on.

"No wonder you've been scared that this secret would come out" Chuck continued. "No wonder you were fighting so hard to protect the secret of someone you love… the person who means the world to you."

"You don't understand" Blair said.

"No I do" Chuck said. "If Louis finds out… If this should ever become public, that you have a child with him… That kid would no longer be yours. The child would belong to the media, to the people of Monaco, to the Grimaldis. You left Louis for a reason; I do not know what that reason was but you didn't want to share your life with him. If your child's existence is ever made known Louis and his family will demand to have their progeny. The child will have to move to Monaco and be raised by them to possibly one day take the throne. That is a lot of pressure on a small child and it effectively means your means of raising this child the way you want to have been taken away. Who knows if they'll even let you see the child much?"

"They're not that bad people" Blair said, feeling she needed to defend them.

"You could lose a whole lot if Louis ever found out about his child" Chuck said. "I understand that, believe me I do. I want to help and protect you. But Blair you cannot do this."

Blair was too shocked to say anything worthwhile. He believed Sebastian was Louis' child. He knew her secret but he only knew half of it. She had to set him straight but he needed to stop talking first so she could figure out how to say it.

"Louis has a right to know about his child" Chuck said softly but she could hear he meant his words with a passion. "There is a person out there that he fathered and not sharing that with him is cruel, no matter how well intended. I know it's not my place to force your hand or even tell you what to do and I won't reveal your secret to him, I promise. I just want you to think this over. I grew up without my mother, always feeling the loss of the parent I didn't get to have in my life. Whether my mother was Evelyn who died at childbirth or Elizabeth who gave me up and made my father lie to me about it, I didn't get to know the woman who gave birth to me as I grew up. I'm imploring you to not do to your child what my father may have done to me. Don't deny that person, the one who means the world to you, the right to know their father. Trust me, it will be a gaping hole in that child's heart. You may not want Louis to know the child but I assure you, you want the child to know Louis."

"It's not that easy" Blair said in a small voice.

"Please Blair" Chuck said. "Every man who fathers a child deserves to know about it. But more importantly every child deserves to know who their parents are. And not just see a picture of that person, to _know_ them."

"I know" Blair said with a trembling voice.

"Look I know you must be scared… Just trust me. You cannot keep the truth from Louis, and from your child, any longer. I promise I will stand by you once the truth comes out and I will do everything in my power to help you keep your child. You shouldn't have to feel afraid of telling the truth."

Blair wiped away a tear that had fallen down her cheek. She had been feeling horrible concealing the truth from Chuck since before Sebastian was even born. She hadn't thought she could feel worse about it but now she knew different. Chuck's instance that a child should know their parent and vice versa hit home even further what a great deception she had committed and how badly the truth would hurt him. She knew it couldn't be easy for him to believe she had a child with Louis, an eternal link to her former fiancé, yet he insisted she tell the child's father the truth. It would have been so much easier if he had defended her decision and told her she had made the right choice. At least if he had done that then she could hope that he would see why she had kept Sebastian from him and maybe be able to forgive her. As things were he would probably hate her with a passion and the thought made her sick.

"Hey…" he said gently, noticing her tears.

He walked up to her and pulled her close, embracing her and gently shushing her. It was meant to be supportive and comforting but all she could think about was how this may be the last time he held her in his arms. The thought fueled more tears and she broke down crying. Chuck rocked her gently and held her even closer.

"It's okay…" he mumbled in her ear. "It's alright. I'm right beside you. If you tell Louis the truth and he demands to have his child I will dig up the best lawyers and pay them ungodly amounts of money to help you win custody. Louis and your child deserve the truth but you are that kid's anchor, their whole world. I will fight with you in any way you need."

Blair sobbed in his arms. None of his reassurances helped her in the slightest, they only made her feel much worse. She almost wished he had found out the whole truth and not just parts of it. Having to tell him that the father he was speaking of was actually himself was more difficult than she could have ever imagined.

* * *

><p>They ended up in Chuck's and Nate's apartment. The reason was to celebrate Blair's crisis being over but Blair didn't feel much like celebrating. She hadn't told Chuck the whole truth. She hadn't been able to. She had wanted to but before she had been able to gather her wits Nate had called and the opportunity had passed.<p>

She felt like such a hypocrite now and like an even worse person than before. She had been given the opportunity to come clean and she hadn't. Earlier on she had tried to tell herself that she hadn't had a chance to tell Chuck the truth yet but now she didn't have that fake reassurance any longer. Now Chuck knew about her child and he had made his opinion quite clear yet Blair continued to lie to him. Even if he found out before the day was over she had still lied about it well after the point when she was out of excuses.

"Come on B, cheer up" Serena said, putting an arm around her and handing her a champagne flute. "Chuck may have handled this on his own and robbed us of our takedown but the important thing is that Malcolm is no longer a threat."

Blair forced herself to smile.

"Girls?" Nate said. "Come on, let's have a toast and then celebrate by getting drunk and doing stupid things, like when we were teens."

"Getting drunk and doing stupid things at our age probably means having an orgy" Chuck teased.

"Like when we were teens" Serena teased.

"Let's get drunk and do stupid things that aren't suggested by Chuck!" Nate grinned, giving Chuck a pat on the back just as Chuck was about to take a sip from his flute, which resulted in the latter spilling champagne on himself.

"Maybe we can get drunk and send Nate off to the dry cleaner's in his underwear" Chuck suggested dryly.

Serena laughed and clinked her flute to Nate's and then Chuck's. Blair ran her finger lightly over the brim of the glass and looked at her friends with mixed feelings. She wanted to tell them how much she loved them and what great friends they were. But all she could seem to think about was Chuck and Sebastian. She forced herself to get a grip. She had gotten herself into this whole mess all on her own by keeping her son a secret. Her friends had done their best to help her out even though they most certainly didn't have to. She could never tell them just how grateful she was to have them as her friends but she could at least try.

"Thank you" she said and the other three stopped talking amongst themselves and turned to look at her. "Thank you all… so very much. You guys don't know how much this means to me that you have helped me. You don't know what you have protected. I could never thank you enough. I love you all. I really do. I may have been in radio silence for several years but you guys never stopped being my best friends."

Nate, Chuck and Serena shared a look. Then Nate turned to Blair with a smile.

"I was going for a festive mood, not a sentimental one" he scolded her in jest. He walked over and gave her a big hug. "You ruined my plans, Waldorf." He kissed her cheek and hugged her close again. "You've been missed these four years. I hope you know that. And we're here for you whenever you need anything. Especially Serena, 'cause we've saved her ass so many times she owes us for life."

"Hey!" Serena objected with a laugh. She walked over and elbowed Nate out of the way to hug Blair. "I love you" she said. "Don't listen to Nate. You are now in debt to me and what you owe me is to stay in New York. I need my best friend back. These two clowns may be good in a pinch but a girl needs her bestie."

She pulled back from the hug and her eyes met Nate's. She smiled warmly at him and when he returned her smile she felt her heart skip a beat. Then they both turned and looked at Chuck who slowly came over and stopped in front of Blair. Nate and Serena automatically took a step back to give him room and he kissed Blair's forehead and pulled her in for a hug. He hugged her with affection but with less warmth than the other two, feeling a bit awkward and worried that the lines might get blurred in the midst of all this emotion.

Blair felt just as awkward as he did. She felt like she was putting up a charade and she was so damn tired of it. She could sense he wasn't entirely comfortable in the moment either and on top of everything else it made her worry that his mind was more on his girlfriend right now than on her.

"Alright, alright" Nate said, breaking up their hug. "If we get any more emotional we're going to start bawling."

"If that happens I fear my manliness will be lost forever" Chuck joked. "Nathaniel go put on some music or something. If you ladies excuse me I'm going to go change out of this suit."

He walked off to his bedroom to go change. Blair took a seat in an armchair and realized she was still holding her flute. She took a sip from it and then set it down on the coffee table, not in the mood for champagne. Serena sat down on the couch and pulled her feet up under her, her smile getting wider when Nate sat down on the couch as well. Blair noted how he sat down next to Serena even though there was lots of space and she smiled slightly. Nate's and Serena's love lives were low on her list of priorities at the moment but it was nice to see the two of them goofily happy.

"So Blair, what now?" Nate asked. "You're free as a bird, crisis averted. How will you celebrate? Going to Disneyland?"

She knew he was poking fun at clichés but it made her cringe. She would love to take Sebastian to Disneyland in a year or so. His comment hit a little too close to home.

"Oh I think I'm just going to kick back and wait for the next time our call signal lights up in the sky" she joked half-heartedly.

They made an effort to carry out a conversation but it soon became clear to Blair that she was superfluous. Nate and Serena kept glancing at each other and soon seemed to be talking only to one another. When Chuck returned Blair was relieved to see him and she got up from her seat to go over to him.

"You're not wearing a suit" she remarked.

"I was feeling nostalgic."

She smiled. His current attire reminded her of the way he dressed in high school, before he crawled into an expensive suit and decided to stay there. She had often missed his creative sense of style from way back when and was glad to have another glimpse of it. He was wearing bright yellow chinos and a forest green cashmere sweater with matching shoes. It made him look younger somehow.

"I see the goofy golden retrievers have gone into their own little world" he said in a lowered voice, nodding towards the duo on the couch.

"Malcolm could have walked in here and kidnapped me while you were changing and they might not have noticed."

"Hey Nathaniel!" Chuck said. "Nice choice of music."

"What?" Nate said, tearing his eyes from Serena.

"We may have gotten a bit older but we're not middle-aged" Chuck said. "_Chicago__'__s_ greatest hits? Really?"

"I love _Chicago_" Serena said with a playful pout.

"Figures. You always did have lousy taste."

Serena ignored him and turned back to Nate with a goofy grin on her face. Chuck leaned in closer to Blair and she felt a whiff of his cologne. Not the same one he had used four years ago. She wondered which one it was.

"What do you say we let these two tragic lovebirds have some privacy?" he said in a conspiring tone.

Blair nodded. She was really glad for Serena's sake that Nate seemed to return her affections. She wasn't sure what had changed with Nate from one day to another but whatever the reason it was nice to see that things might turn out well for them.

"Blair you haven't been here before, have you?" Chuck said in a loud tone, designed to let the other two overhear.

"No."

"I'm going to give Blair a tour. You guys want to come along?"

"Bye Bass" Nate said. "Just don't give her an unchaperoned tour of your bedroom."

Chuck shot him a glare and then walked off to another room with Blair in tow. He gave her a tour of the large apartment and Blair thought it was a step up from the Empire penthouse. It had two large bedrooms and one guest room, a study, a large kitchen, a dining room and a spacious living room. Every room seemed to have been meticulously styled and decorated though Chuck refrained from telling her that the decorator was Emmy. Blair noted that it was both stylish and inviting but she didn't comment much during the tour, trying to gather her courage to speak to him now that they were alone. The courage didn't seem to come and before she knew it he had showed her the whole apartment.

When the tour was over they returned to the living room where Nate and Serena were still flirting wildly but apparently hadn't gotten to first base yet. Chuck rolled his eyes and decided there was one more place Blair hadn't seen. He lead her out on the large balcony connected to the living room and Blair took in the view of the city below them. _Chicago_ was playing "_25 __or __6 __to __4_" on the stereo and they could hear the occasional laugh from Serena. Aside from that the only sounds came from the wind and the city below.

There was silence between them at first. Blair couldn't even look at him in the first few minutes, overwhelmed by memories of another time they had stood by a banister overlooking the city with a light wind blowing. It had been her seventeenth birthday and he had admitted to having butterflies. That had been the real start of them. The night in the limo could have been a one-time thing, an amazing event between two close friends who then went back to being just friends. When the butterflies had entered the picture everything had changed.

She looked up at him. Chuck smiled warmly at her.

"You're a mama" he said. "I haven't really comprehended it yet. It's… overwhelming to think about."

Blair swallowed and looked down at her hands. Now was the time.

"About that. Chuck I-"

"God, I'm sorry" Chuck said. "I don't know what I was thinking. Nate and Serena still don't know and we shouldn't talk about it where they can overhear us. It's not exactly an ideal way for them to find out about it."

"There's something I need to tell you" Blair said.

Chuck nodded and she knew she had his full attention. Then a loud shrieking laughter courtesy of Serena interrupted them and Blair felt about ready to go inside, grab Serena by what was left of her hair and Nate by his beard and drag them to Nate's bedroom. They could stay there until this conversation was over. Maybe if they were locked together in a room with a bed they might actually get somewhere in the progression of their relationship.

Chuck laughed a little and Blair drew in a deep breath to gather courage.

"Doesn't this bring back memories?" he said.

She frowned and then let her breath out. What was he talking about?

"I think I could still play a few chords from this song on the piano if you gave me a moment to remember them."

She stared at him with confusion. Then he hummed a few bars and she realized he was talking about the song currently playing. The hint of a smile spread across her face. She knew exactly what memories he had referred to. She had been reminded of that very same thing when he played on the piano the other day.

It was one of her favorite memories from the summer when they were dating. They had been out to a club and gone back to her mother's penthouse. It had just been the two of them there, Eleanor and Cyrus had been in Paris and Dorota had been on vacation. They had stumbled off the elevator, giggling, and somewhat unsteadily made their way to the nearest place to sit. Or at least that had been the intention. The couch and divan were closer but Chuck had ended up by the piano and Blair had dropped down on his lap and kissed him hungrily until her elbow ended up on the keys, disrupting them.

Even though they had both been drunk they remembered the events of that evening very clearly. Blair had teasingly complained that he wasn't old Hollywood romantic enough and never professed his love for her in song. That had lead to about five minutes of giggling and bantering which had ended with Chuck playing what he assumed were the opening chords to "_You__'__re __the __Inspiration_" but if he had been sober he would have realized he wasn't exactly on key.

Blair and Chuck shared a look out on the balcony, both of them reliving the same memories. Chuck had begun to sing the song to her but couldn't remember all the lyrics so Blair had filled in the gaps. They had sung the choruses together at the top of their lungs, thinking at the time that it sounded great but realizing afterwards that it probably sounded awful. The whole thing had ended with the two of them laughing for several minutes at how trite they thought the song was and then somehow ending up on the floor where they had fumbling sex.

"Thank God poor Dorota was not home that night…" Chuck said with a little laugh. "Having to hear us completely butcher that song and then having to hear us have messy, drunken sex while whoever happened to be at the bottom at the time whined about how uncomfortable the floor was… The woman is a saint but even she would lose her patience with that."

"Those were good times…" Blair smiled.

"They were, weren't they? We had some really great times, you and me."

Blair nodded and decided to breach another difficult subject as a warm-up.

"I'm guessing… you never serenade your girlfriend, huh?"

"She hates _Chicago_. She'd probably hate them more in my rendition."

"You know I… I'm happy for you. I'm glad you're doing alright. The things Nate told me right after I left Monaco had me worried."

Chuck's smile was gone.

"What did Nate tell you?"

"That you were in a really bad place. He was concerned for you and that made _me_ concerned. I'm glad you were able to…"

She couldn't bring herself to finish the sentence. She _was_ glad he wasn't miserable but she would be lying if she said she was glad that he had moved on. Chuck's eyes had darkened and he had a very disapproving look in them.

"What is Nate doing talking to you about how I feel?" he asked. "I wasn't at the top of the world at that time but I don't need anybody's pity."

"It's not pity" Blair said. "The thought of what you must have been feeling at that time is just… I never wanted my happiness to be at the expense of yours."

"I know."

"Now you _are_ happy. I've only met Emmy for a brief moment but if she makes you happy then she… she has my stamp of approval" she said, partly sincere and partly not.

"You sure about that?" Chuck teased. "You don't want to claw her eyes out?"

She gave him a playful smack on the arm.

"You are _not_ all that irresistible" she teased.

Another loud shrieking laughter from Serena interrupted them. Chuck rolled his eyes, then laughed.

"What do you say we close the door on loudmouth in there?"

Blair nodded and laughed as Chuck pulled the door close to block out Serena, Nate and the music.

* * *

><p>Inside on the couch Nate and Serena were locked in a gaze. Nate's hand moved up to move a strain of hair from her face and ended up resting on her cheek. Serena could barely breathe. Nate had apologized to her for going along with flirting up the bartender and that was enough to convince Serena that he really did like her back still. The two of them had gotten back to where they had been before Blair returned to New York and now they were about to kiss again. Only this time it would be a real, honest kiss that made their feelings for each other clear. When they made out the weekend before Blair's return they had been drunk and since neither of them had dared to move forward with it the next day they had both acted as if it was just a bit of harmless, drunken fun. This moment however was for real.<p>

Nate leaned in closer to her and she closed her eyes, almost gasping with anticipation. Just as his lips brushed hers there was a loud knock on the door. They both groaned and Serena opened her eyes. She wanted to ignore whoever was at the door but there was another knock and it was clear that the moment was ruined.

"Please get rid of whoever that is" Serena pleaded.

"We're of one mind" Nate replied.

He leaned in and placed a quick, light kiss on her lips before getting up and walking over to answer the door. There was yet another round of knocks before he got there and when he opened it he found Dan standing there.

"Now is not a good time" Nate said.

"Why are you not answering your phone?" Dan asked.

"I have the sound switched off. I'm in the middle of something."

"Look I know it's running late and you have things to do but I really need to talk" Dan said, walking inside without waiting for an invitation. "Something's happened. I did something this morning and at first I thought everything was okay but now I… Well I need to talk to somebody about it."

"Why not pick up the phone and call your sister?" Nate suggested. "Or hey, go talk to Rufus. He's always all ears."

"No I can't talk to either of them about this."

"Then go online, find a chat room. They have those for all kinds of problems these days. I'm sure you'll find a solution there."

"Why are you being weird?" Dan asked.

Without waiting for an answer he walked further inside the apartment. He was getting more and more frustrated by the minute and needed to tell somebody about his declaration of love to Blair, the way she had responded and his analysis of the situation. There was nobody better to talk to than Nate, who knew Blair since childhood and would be able to confirm or deny his theories about her behavior.

He stopped when he reached the living room and found Serena curled up on the couch. He hadn't been expecting to see her there.

"Oh" he said. "Hi…"

"Hello Dan" she said.

"You, uhm… I didn't expect to see you here."

"Didn't expect to see you here either."

"How was, uh… How was your takedown?"

The mentioning of the planned takedown reminded Nate, who was right at Dan's heels, about the other two people who had been present when they corked up the champagne. He frowned and looked around the room.

"Hey where did Blair and Chuck go?" he asked Serena.

"Don't ask me" Serena shrugged. "Maybe they went to take the tour of Chuck's bedroom after all…"

"Wait, what?" Dan said. "Blair and Chuck? Please tell me you're joking."

"I seriously hope that wherever they are they're not doing anything they shouldn't" Nate frowned.

"They're adults" Serena pointed out, annoyed with Nate's strong opinion in the matter. "They can do whatever they want. Including each other. Not that I think they're going to under these circumstances."

"Once they get it into their heads that they want to get animalistic together there's no telling what can happen and they would both be better off never seeing each other naked again" Nate said. "Or having any physical contact with each other's tongue. I am not sitting through another round of Blair and Chuck melodrama."

"Where is all this coming from?" Serena frowned. "You're being unfair to them. And how is this even any of our business?"

"Blair and Chuck cannot be alone together" Dan said.

"What's it to you?" Serena asked, now annoyed with both guys.

"What's it to you what it is to him?" Nate asked, upset with Serena's reaction.

"I think neither one of you have the right to have an opinion about what Blair and Chuck do when they're alone."

"Chuck should be with Emmy and no good can come out of Blair disrupting things" Nate argued.

"That's not for you to decide."

"Blair should be with anyone in the world but for Chuck" Dan said, annoyed with the insinuation that Blair would be the troublemaker. "Keep your psychotic roommate on a leash, Nate. He's the problem, not Blair."

"Huh?"

"How the hell does it affect you if Blair wants to be with Chuck?" Serena asked.

"How the hell does it affect _you_ if it affects Dan if Blair wants to be with Chuck?" Nate asked her in return.

"Okay, time out" Dan said. "Let's just find out where they went, shall we?"

* * *

><p>Some of the commotion from inside made it through to Chuck and Blair out on the balcony but they wrote it off as Serena and Nate talking to each other. They didn't pay much attention to what went on inside, fully engrossed in their playful banter and enjoying each other's presence. Somehow they had ended up standing right beside one another and not a few feet apart as they had stood when they first walked out on the balcony. Blair was starting to feel very relaxed and had momentarily forgotten what they were supposed to be talking about. It felt so good to indulge in their playful banter and to just be near him. The moment felt intoxicating.<p>

"I can't believe you still have clothes like this in your closet" Blair teased and tugged at his sweater.

"Sometimes the Phantom walks the streets like a regular person."

"I don't think that's how the quote goes."

They both laughed a little and leaned closer to each other. Their foreheads touched. Then their noses. Blair closed her eyes and let out a content, almost inaudible sigh as she tilted her head towards him for the kiss that would follow. Their first in four years. Probably the most anticipated kiss of her life.

But when all her lips found was air she opened her eyes, almost too confused for words. He had leaned away from her and sported a fairly casual expression.

"I've been needing to go to the bathroom for like half an hour" he said. "Excuse me for a moment."

He walked back inside and Blair stood there blinking like a lighthouse, utterly confused by what had just taken place. They had been about to kiss. She knew that. There was no other logical follow-up to foreheads and noses touching in the manner hers and Chuck's had. What on earth was going on? Why had he resisted her kiss?

Back inside Chuck was surprised to find Dan in his living room and stopped for a second. Dan eyed him with suspicion and Chuck glanced around the room wondering what was going on. Serena was on the couch looking pissed, Nate was nowhere to be seen. He should probably be more curious about when Dan had arrived and what was really going on but he had enough on his mind without adding anyone else to the equation.

Dan was relieved to see Chuck coming back inside without Blair following but it was a small comfort. He had seen the two of them out on the balcony just now. He had seen how close they had come to kissing and he had seen who had resisted. It hurt a lot to see Blair look at Chuck the way Dan wished she would look at him. It finally began to sink in that Blair would always look at Chuck that way. She was caught in his spell and he was low enough to string her along even though he was supposed to be in a loving relationship with somebody else. It was like he wouldn't allow Blair to move on. Dan felt heartbroken and rejected and wanted to take his disappointment out on someone. He looked over at Chuck again and wondered why he was dressed like he was back in high school.

"Nice outfit. You look like a bisexual comic book hero" he said, knowing the insult was lame but at least it was something.

"A genre you're well acquainted with, I'm sure" Chuck replied. "If you'll excuse me."

He walked off to the bathroom and Dan's eyes went back to Blair, who was all alone out on the balcony.

"Don't" Serena's voice said.

"Don't what?" he asked without taking his eyes off Blair.

"Don't go out there and talk to her. She doesn't want you Dan. You should respect that."

"She's not going to be happy with Chuck."

"Maybe not. That doesn't mean she will choose you second."

Dan finally tore his eyes from Blair and looked over at Serena. Somehow she knew about his feelings for Blair. Perhaps Blair had told her? Serena seemed quite upset with it and he wondered why that was. Could it be that Serena still had feelings for him?

* * *

><p>Chuck leaned over the sink and splashed his face with cold water, though really it was a whole other part of his body that needed cooling down. He looked at himself in the mirror, water dripping from him. He was just as aware as Blair had been that they had been about to kiss. He had realized it just in time and pulled away and now he needed a moment to gather himself before he went back out there.<p>

He had a strong feeling he had just missed out on what could have rivaled one of the best kisses of his life thus far, the kiss Blair had given him the first time he told her he loved her. Getting to kiss Blair again after all these years, after so much longing, would have been indescribable bliss. Still he was grateful he had been able to resist it.

He had a girlfriend. He was not about to cheat on her, no matter how much he cared for Blair. End one relationship before taking any steps towards the next one. Emmy was in the middle of a really stressful period at work right now but things were supposed to calm down after Monday. If it did he would speak to her then. It wouldn't be an easy conversation but he would end his relationship with her. It had to be done. He couldn't be this close to Blair every day and feel the mutual attraction and strong pull between them and not act on it eventually. Before that could happen things needed to be over with Emmy. As much as he loved her he loved Blair more and he knew by now that his feelings for her would never go away. When she was away he had been able to tell himself that she was just a pleasant memory and Emmy was the one for him now but now that both women were around it was clear to him what he needed to do.

He took a deep breath and slowly let it out. Then he grabbed a towel to dry himself off and left the bathroom. When he got back to the living room Nate had reappeared, looking concerned. He walked over and gave Chuck a stern look.

"Please tell me you didn't do anything with Blair that you shouldn't have" he said in a low voice.

"Please tell me you did something with Serena that you really should have" Chuck replied, mocking his low voice.

"If you allow yourself to be sucked back in to the whole Chuck and Blair thing you're going to end up with your heart broken all over again" Nate said. "Only this time Emmy's heart will be broken too."

"Why do you care so much?"

"You're my friend. Frankly picking up the pieces after your breakups with Blair got to be quite the pain in the ass."

"Nobody asked you to pick up any pieces" Chuck said. "As for Emmy and me… You should have enough faith in me to trust that I'll break up with her before I do anything with Blair, or anyone else."

"You're not thinking about breaking up with her, are you?" Nate asked in a hiss. "That would be the worst decision you could ever make!"

"Maybe _you_ should date her if you're so damn fond of her" Chuck snarled, getting increasingly annoyed with Nate voicing an opinion of his love life.

"What are you guys whispering about?" Serena asked from her spot on the couch. She was in a very foul mood. "Look this celebration has obviously gone to hell; can't we just call it a night and go our separate ways?"

"Oh so now you don't want to stay?" Nate asked with exasperation.

"No not really."

"Well maybe you can catch a lift home with Dan and everything will be hunky dory for you" Nate griped and walked off towards his bedroom.

"What is going on in here?" Blair asked, coming back inside. "Humphrey? What the hell are you doing here? You have not been summoned."

"I came to speak to Nate. I didn't realize you would all be here."

"Well shoo!" Blair said, waving her hands as if shooing an animal.

"You heard the lady, get lost" Chuck said.

"What, you're actually kicking me out?" Dan said with disbelief.

"If the shoo fits…"

"You know what, I'm just going to go talk to Nate" Dan said and walked towards Nate's room. "That's what I came here to do anyway. But Blair, please, a word before I go?"

"Ugh, fine!" Blair said and followed him to the next room.

"Look, you seriously need to think this over" Dan said as soon as they were out of earshot. "I saw you guys out on the balcony and I'm telling you, think this through. Chuck is bad for you. If you go after him now you're only going to end up with your heart broken. Blair he is in love with another woman. He's not going to leave her, especially not once he finds out what you did. He didn't love you enough to choose you over the Empire. He damn sure doesn't love you enough to live up to your fantasies and expectations."

"Please take your petty jealousy elsewhere" Blair said.

"Forget about my feelings" Dan said, hard as it was. "Love or not, I'm still your friend. I don't want to see you getting hurt."

"I won't be" Blair said. "I have faith in Chuck. I love Chuck. Please stay out of it Dan. I'd rather take my chances and end up hurt again than miss out on something wonderful. I've been living without it for far too long already. I appreciate you looking out for me. I do. You need to understand though that there are some things you have no insight to." She sighed and shook her head. "It's been a long night. I'm going to head home. I was hoping to have another moment alone with Chuck but I don't think it's the right time after all this commotion. I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"

She walked off and Dan sighed heavily. He knocked on Nate's door and went inside, finding Nate in a really bad mood as well. Somehow he seemed to have been able to ruin everybody's day and he wasn't quite sure how that had happened.

"You know what Dan, this is really not a good time" Nate growled.

"What exactly is going on?" Dan asked. "Did you guys fail in taking down Malcolm? None of you seem very triumphant."

"I don't want to talk right now" Nate said. "Why don't you go and have a cozy heart-to-heart with Serena?"

Dan blinked, utterly confused. The more he saw and heard the more convinced he got that Serena still had feelings for him and he wasn't sure what to do with that. He was in love with Blair after all. He really wanted to talk to Nate about it but it wasn't hard to see that this was not the right time. With a sigh he left Nate's room and headed for the front door. He stopped in the hallway outside the living room where he could hear Serena and Chuck talking. He had a feeling that if he walked out into the room they would both quiet down or change the subject and he was really eager to know if something had happened during the day.

"I would never have guessed I would be in this situation a week ago" he heard Chuck say with a sigh.

"Well you're in it" Serena answered. "Question is, what are you going to do?"

She had grabbed a blanket and wrapped it around herself. Chuck was pacing slowly back and forth in the room and looked over at her with a frustrated face.

"There's only one thing I can do" he said. "I have to tell Emmy that it's over between us."

"You're going to break her heart" Serena pointed out mildly.

"You don't think I'm aware of that?" Chuck snarled. "It has to be done. I love Emmy but it's not on the same level with what I feel for Blair."

"Did something happen out on the balcony?"

Dan moved closer to hear better, on the edge of his seat to hear the answer.

"No" Chuck said. "That's not the point. The point is that I wanted something to happen. Had I been single I would have kissed Blair. I would have kissed her and this time I would not have let her go because I've had to watch her walk away far too many times already. Never again, Serena. When my feelings for her are that strong how could I possibly stay with Emmy? What I've had with her is great but it's finally dawned on me that settling won't make me happy. It won't make Emmy happy either. I don't want that for her; I want her to be with someone who loves her and only her. She should be with somebody much better than me. It's not going to be easy to break up with her but it needs to happen. I don't know if I will end up with Blair but I can't treat Emmy like a fallback option."

"If it makes you feel any better Blair still loves you" Serena said. "I honestly believe that the only thing standing between you guys right now is Emmy. If Blair is the one you really want then there's only one right choice to make."

"Emmy's not the only thing" Chuck said. "I found out about Blair's secret. It's going to pose some issues for us but I'm willing to fight for her and see this through."

"You found out what Blair's secret is?" Serena said, flabbergasted. "Tell me right now!"

"Blair has to be the one to do that."

"What? You can't just blurt out that you know what the big secret is and then not tell me!" Serena cried.

Dan barely heard the rest of the conversation. He was shocked to hear that Chuck had found out about Sebastian. What shocked him even further was that Chuck was dedicated to being with Blair and planned on breaking up with his seemingly perfect girlfriend even though he knew Blair had kept the truth from him. He didn't even sound angry over it. Dan's heart sunk to the sole of his shoes, realizing that if Chuck's love truly ran that deep then there was no way Dan could compete. Blair was fixated on having Chuck and now she was going to have her way. It didn't matter what Dan said or what Chuck did. It sickened Dan to think of how after all of this Blair would probably stay with Chuck forever no matter what he did to her, bound to him by the fact that he had forgiven her for keeping their son a secret. Dan didn't think Blair would be happy for very long but there was nothing he could do about it.

He was vaguely aware that the front door opened and closed and that things went silent. Then he realized Serena had probably left and possibly Chuck as well. There was no reason for Dan to stick around so he continued towards the front door, passing through the living room on the way. Chuck was still there, gathering the champagne flutes. Dan stopped, feeling incredibly awkward in the other man's presence. It ate away at him that he had lost to Chuck Bass, the least worthy man he could think of. He wished he knew how Chuck had found out the truth and why he wasn't more upset about it but he didn't dare to ask. He probably wouldn't get a straight answer even if he did.

"Oh, I thought you… I thought you left" he said, not knowing what else to say.

"I live here" Chuck reminded him.

"I know, I just… You know, I thought you usually stayed with uh… with your girlfriend. Uhm… Anyway I'm just going to go."

"Be on your merry way" Chuck said, sounding tired, pouring himself a glass of champagne from the still half-full bottle.

"Never passing on an opportunity to imbibe, huh?" Dan remarked, walking slowly through the room.

"It's a celebration" Chuck said. "Blair's problem has been solved, crisis is over… If there is such a thing as karma I will be rewarded for having helped her out by never having to lay eyes on you again. That's worthy of some champagne in my book."

Dan stopped in the doorway and turned around, needing to satisfy his curiosity.

"I overheard you talking to Serena. You said you had found out about Blair's secret. How… how did…"

"Jack Bass" Chuck said. "Turns out he was the one who hired Malcolm. He still thinks getting to Blair is the best way of getting to me."

"Jack? How did _he_ know about…"

"Same way I would have if I kept tabs on Blair, I suppose" Chuck shrugged and took a gulp of champagne. "He had the birth certificate, which I assume a PI had dug up for him."

"But we…" Dan began. Then he stopped himself, realizing that Jack could have gotten a copy of the birth certificate before Blair went to collect it.

"Malcolm must be in some really deep trouble. Or else he's an idiot" Chuck remarked. "An unknown member of the Monegasque royal family would have been the scoop of his career. Unfortunately for Blair it's only a matter of time before somebody else learns about it and the story comes out."

Dan did a double-take. Chuck knew about Blair's son but he was talking about him as if he had been fathered by Louis.

"Jack showed you a birth certificate that said Louis Grimaldi is the father of Blair's child?" he asked.

"Our girl is more clever than that" Chuck said. "The father was listed as unknown."

Dan's mind worked a mile a minute. Chuck had seen the birth certificate but he didn't know who the father was. He assumed it was Louis and nobody had told him otherwise. His love and devotion for Blair might not be as strong as Dan had suspected after all. Blair probably didn't think so either since she had kept her mouth shut still even though Chuck must have confronted her about what he had learned. Now Chuck was going to break up with his girlfriend for Blair but Dan had to wonder if he would be as eager to do so if he knew the whole truth. He also wondered if deep down Blair was having second thoughts herself about Chuck and if that was the reason why she hadn't come clean to him.

Jealousy burned in him and he was filled with hatred towards this man. Chuck had never done anything to deserve Blair, or Sebastian for that matter. Why should he get to have it all? But the last word had not been said. Dan still had the opportunity to fight for what he wanted and if Chuck got crushed in the process it didn't matter much to Dan right now. He would probably regret it in the morning but he just couldn't stop himself. Chuck should not get to live happily ever after with Blair and Dan was going to make sure of that.

"Blair's child is not Louis'" he said. "If Blair told you that she is lying."

"What?" Chuck asked, sounding more irritated by his presence than surprised by what he had just said.

"Blair did give birth to a child but not one fathered by the prince of Monaco" Dan said. "The kid is yours."

Chuck slowly put the champagne bottle down and then the flute. He looked over at Dan with a mixture of confusion and growing worry.

"Humphrey what have you been smoking?"

"It's the truth and if you don't believe me get a paternity test. It's the real reason why she left Louis. Did you bother to check the birth date on the birth certificate? She gave birth nine months after your little mishap at the Plaza and she knew long before the child was born who the father was. She kept it from you. If you ask me she did the right thing."

"You're lying" Chuck said, slowly shaking his head. "Blair wouldn't do such a thing."

"Why would I lie?"

"Why would you know the truth to begin with?"

"You are the father of her child" Dan said. "It's about time you knew. What you do with that information is up to you. But there's a reason why she never told you and I don't think that spells a bright future for you guys as a couple. We both know Blair. If she wanted to raise the child with you she would have told you by now."

"Get… the hell… out" Chuck said through gritted teeth.

Dan turned on his heel and walked out of the apartment. Inside the elevator he leaned back against the wall and slowly let the air out of his lungs.

Inside the apartment Chuck's heart was beating a mile a minute. He was barely aware that he was shaking. Humphrey had to be lying. He couldn't be telling the truth. Blair would have told him a long time ago if that were the case. She would not have looked him in the eye today and let him believe that the child was Louis' if that was not the truth.

He wondered if he was being horribly disloyal to her by doubting her but at the same time he knew he needed to know for certain. He strode to his bedroom and picked up the phone he had left on the dresser. He barely noticed that he had four missed calls from Emmy, pressing the speed dial button for Mike, his most trusted PI.

"Mike I have a job for you" he said the second the other man picked up. "It's Chuck Bass. I need you to look into Blair Waldorf, specifically the child she gave birth to a few years ago. No, I didn't know she had a kid either. What I need to know is who the damn father of this kid is. And I need the information _now_, do you understand me? Well I don't care that it's late in the evening. I don't pay you the big bucks so you can work only comfortable hours. Now get on it and get back to me as soon as possible. Oh, and Mike? Complete discretion on this one."

He hung up and tossed the phone aside. He grabbed the dressed with both hands, breathing heavily. He looked up and met his own reflection in the mirror. Dan had to be lying. There was no other alternative.

* * *

><p>I hope Blair didn't come off as horribly unsympathetic. I'll be the first to admit that her still not telling Chuck the whole truth is kind of contrived. My reasoning is that she really wants the three of them to have a future together as a family and she's <em>really<em> scared of losing her chances of that future even though Chuck has to know the truth before they can be a family at all.

As for Dan, when I outlined this chapter I made him act OOC with a specific development in mind (one not related to Chuck and the child) and now that the chapter has been written I still think he acted OOC in the last scene (which was on purpose). Ironically enough what I've seen of season five thus far makes my take on Dan in this chapter far less OOC than my original intention was. Just look at his actions in the season premiere... Anyway, what I really wanted to say was that I know he's acting a bit weird here and it's done on purpose and will be elaborated on later.

Thanks for reading! Please review!


	10. Chapter 10

Not a lot of love for Dan after the last chapter… Hopefully though that will change (at least a bit) later on. Probably not in this chapter though. It is the last of this fic, but there will be a lot of stuff left unresolved for the sequel story.

I was very relieved that people seem to find Blair's actions understandable. The question is if the other characters will be as understanding. Read and find out!

* * *

><p>Blair walked inside Chuck's office, nervous to see him. They hadn't gotten a chance to talk last night after they almost kissed and she didn't want things to be awkward now. She wondered if that was why he had texted her and told her to come to his office.<p>

He was standing by his desk with his back to her, his hands on his hips and his head bent. He looked tense. She wanted to walk up to him and massage his shoulders until he loosened up. It was no wonder he seemed uptight. The past week had been overwhelming for all of them and she knew there might be some trouble in his relationship caused by her. On top of that his business had taken a backseat to Blair's problems and he probably had quite the workload to deal with now that the Malcolm situation was over. Unfortunately there would be more stress in his life real soon when she told him about their son. At least that stress might in the end lead to something good.

"Chuck…" she said softly.

"When… were you going to tell me…" he began with an angry but composed tone before turning his head to give her a cold glare, "that you got your child from me?"

She felt calmer than she would have expected. There was no doubt about it, this time he knew the whole truth. Judging by the look on his face and the tone of his voice her estimates of what his reaction would be were probably understatements. She felt afraid yet strangely liberated. It was a relief to no longer have any lies. The great burden she had made herself carry for so long was now lifted and she could deal with the fallout, whatever it may be. Though she had a feeling this composure might be a result of light shock as she was already feeling herself welling up and shiver slightly.

"Or is it all a lie?" he asked angrily. "Tell me… that it's a lie. Tell me that this child of yours is not your child by me!"

"I'm so, so sorry Chuck" she breathed. "Believe me, I never meant to hide this."

"Oh God…" Chuck said, shaking his head with disbelief. "God I… I didn't truly believe it until you confirmed it. I told myself that it must be some mistake, that there was no way in _hell_ you could do that."

"Chuck it's not-"

"Don't try and defend yourself!" Chuck snarled. "There is no justification for this! Not only did you neglect to tell me the single most important bit of news of my entire life when it happened, you also failed to mention it when you came back to New York and brought me back into your life. Not twenty-four hours ago you stood here in this office and listened to me telling you how I thought you needed to be honest with the child's father and yet you kept your damn mouth shut! Just over twelve hours ago you flirted with me out on the balcony and you were _not_ the one who averted that kiss. How the hell could you do this Blair?"

"I never meant to hurt you" Blair said. "I never meant for it to go this far."

"Then what the hell did you mean? What? You felt I didn't deserve to know? That my child being born didn't concern me? That I wasn't good enough to be part of this child's life?"

"No! That's not it at all. I just… It wasn't so easy. I was engaged to Louis when I discovered I was pregnant and I didn't know what to do."

"I don't give a damn about any of that" Chuck snarled. "It shouldn't matter whether or not you were _married_ to someone else when you found out. _You_ chose to have sex with me and cheat on Louis. That means _you_ take your share of the responsibility. But I guess you got your revenge now, didn't you?"

"Revenge?"

"I made that deal with Jack all those years ago and you finally paid me back for it. Too bad the person who really has to pay the price is an innocent child."

"This has nothing to do with-"

"Then what the hell is this?" Chuck cried. "I've been racking my brain trying to figure out why you did this. What could I possibly have done to you to make you keep my child from me? The Empire deal is the only thing I can think of but I honestly never thought you would be so _petty_ as to-"

"Chuck stop it!" Blair cried. He quieted and she took a deep, trembling breath, composing herself.

"Whatever friendship we had, it's done" Chuck said icily. "We're not friends anymore and I can't stand to think of how... You obviously don't love me anymore and who knows if you ever did?"

She trembled, fighting hard to keep calm through the panic that was beginning to grow inside her. She had never seen him like this. The look in his eyes, the tone of his voice, all of it was torture to her. She had avoided telling him partially because she had feared this moment and the pain it would cause him but like she had known it would the truth hurt him even more since it had come from somebody else. She couldn't figure out how he had found out that he was a father. Not that it mattered much at the moment. She could feel the distance growing between them with every passing second and there was nothing she could do to change that. She could only imagine what he was feeling. What could it be like to find out that you were somebody's parent and you didn't know the first thing about that person?

"His name is Sebastian" she said, trying her best to keep her voice steady. "I call him Bas for short, or… Little Bas."

"What you call him is neither here nor there" Chuck said, turning away from her and placing his hands on the desk as if bracing himself.

"His birthday is February 15th. At birth he weighed-"

"Blair it doesn't matter! I'm not angry that I didn't know his birth weight, I'm angry that I didn't even know _I __had __a __son_!" He felt himself shiver as he said the word. He hadn't known until Blair mentioned his name whether he had a boy or a girl. The fact that he hadn't known that infuriated him.

"I watched every season of '_Mad __Men_' when he was little. I watched it while I nursed. I wanted him to have… things that were part of who you were around him."

"Sure, that makes it okay. Watching shows I used to like is definitely a worthy substitute of a real father."

"He had a bit of colic when he was a baby and sometimes it helped to play music on a low volume to help soothe him to sleep. Sometimes I… I played '_Aida_'."

"Do you think any of this makes it any better? Do you? I woke up yesterday and I didn't know that there's a little boy in France who is my son. Nothing you can say could possibly make me feel any better. Nothing can even remotely make it okay."

"His favorite cartoon is the Smurfs" Blair continued, tears falling down her face. "He watches them on DVD all the time."

"You shouldn't have to tell me all of this! I should know these things already. You were never going to tell me the truth, were you? You kept it from me for four years and you had ample opportunity to be honest with me and you never thought it was a good idea to share this bit of information with me."

"I wanted to tell you but it's not so easy."

"God, and to have to hear about it from _Humphrey_!" Chuck exclaimed, slamming his palms on the desk and turning around to face her.

Blair was speechless for a moment, stunned by what he had just said. Humphrey? He found out through Dan?

"What are you saying?" she asked.

"As if all this wasn't insulting enough. You didn't think I was worthy of knowing the truth but apparently your pathetic boy toy Humphrey deserved the truth. I should be grateful that he's a little snitch or I would never know I have a son. I don't know what kept him from telling all years ago, hell it's a miracle I didn't find out through reading his next book. I just can't believe you shared this with him and you didn't tell me. The boy's _father_."

"I never meant for you to find out this way!"

"Oh I believe that. You never meant for me to find out at all."

"That is not true" Blair said in a pleading tone, begging him to understand and believe her. "I wanted to tell you right from the start, but I-"

"Oh don't give me that" Chuck snarled. "I know you, or at least I thought I did. If you wanted me to know then no force on earth could have stopped you."

"I wasn't even sure you _were_ the father at first" Blair said. "I didn't know what to do, Chuck. I was stuck in an impossible situation. You have no idea how much I've agonized over this. It's been deeply stressful every step of the way. When I found out for sure that you were the father I was happy but I was also scared."

"Yeah well I almost had a _fucking_ panic attack!"

"I'm sorry" Blair said, wiping away tears with the back of her hand. "I'm so, so sorry. I never meant for it to go this far."

"That's it?" Chuck asked. "That's all you have to say? Some small part of me was actually hoping that you might have a solid reason for keeping this from me. I even allowed myself to think that you might have been pressured by Louis and his family to keep this under wraps since it would be a scandal if people knew the prince of Monaco's fiancée was pregnant by another man when the wedding was called off."

"I wish I could tell you something like that but I can't" Blair said, knowing that if she were to have any chance of forgiveness at this point she had to be completely honest and take full responsibility for the choices she had made. "It was a mistake. From beginning to end. I just got so deep into it that I ended up not knowing how to get out of it."

"That's not good enough" Chuck said.

"It wasn't so easy, Chuck! You were in New York and I was in France. I was scared to go back home because I knew I would have paparazzi following me and I didn't want you to find out I was pregnant from _Gossip __Girl_. What was I supposed to do? Tell you over the phone?"

"You and I both know I would have travelled to France to see you if you told me you needed me to come over" Chuck said. "I would have travelled to the ends of the earth for you and you know it. Jack's right, I am pathetic when it comes to you. Or at least I have been up until now."

"Oh really?" Blair said, crossing her arms over her chest. "There was a time when I believed you would do anything I asked of you but that was before you made that deal with Jack and before you slept with Jenny Humphrey and before you told me you would wait for me and then went and told someone else she was sacred to you. I wasn't sure you would come to France, believe me I thought about it. But by the time I left Louis you were with Emmy. I had no reason to think you would come all the way to France to see me when you were busy falling in love with another woman."

"Forget about Emmy" Chuck said. "She is not the reason you kept your mouth shut. She came into my life _months_ after we conceived that child and you still kept the pregnancy from me. Or actually, let's talk about Emmy. Am I to understand that because I got involved with another woman I lost my rights to my son?"

"That is not what I said and don't you dare twist my words" Blair said.

"You should leave."

"What?"

"I want you… to get out" Chuck said, turning his back to her again. "This is too much. I can't handle being in the same room with you right now. I want to yell and scream at you but that's not going to make the situation any better. It won't give me back everything I've lost with my… with my son. I can't handle this in a rational manner right now. So just go."

Blair swallowed and rubbed her upper arms, feeling cold. She took a step closer to him and fought to hold on to what was left of her composure.

"Chuck I love you" she said in what was barely more than a whisper.

"Well I'd rather you didn't!" Chuck said, turning around to face her. "At least if you hated me this wouldn't be such a god damned betrayal!" He strode past her and stopped in front of the '_Casablanca_' poster, unable to look at her right then. "I will only ask you one more time to leave. If you're not out of this door in thirty seconds security will escort you out of here. There's nothing you can say to make this any better and right now I have nothing to say to you that you would want to hear."

Blair turned on her heel and took a few steps towards the door. Then she gave up on trying to stay calm and quickened her pace. She almost ran out the door and ignored Alice who rose from her seat when she saw Blair come running out of the office. She slammed her palm against the call button for the elevator and wished it would hurry up and come so she could get the hell out of there. Chuck was right, they couldn't be around each other right now. He needed to calm down and she needed to find a way to make him see.

She reached the lobby and hurried out of the elevator, wishing she was home so she could have a complete breakdown. Now what was she supposed to do? Until she could make Chuck understand, if that was even possible, she had no friend to turn to. Nate would side with Chuck, she had no doubt about that. Under different circumstances she might have been able to count on Serena, but she would be forced to choose who to side with, her best friend or her brother. Serena would be horrified to learn the truth and she would be furious at Blair for keeping it from her and that was sure to tip the scales in Chuck's favor. Above all she no longer had Dan. Dan, the only friend who had known her secret. He had betrayed her and for what?

"Whoa, slow down!" a familiar voice said as she hurried by the front desk.

She stopped in her tracks and turned around. She had just passed Jack Bass and he was grinning at her with far too much contentment in his eyes. Chuck had said he was involved in this somehow. Suddenly it all made more sense. Jack had found out his nephew had a child he didn't know about and it was the perfect thing to use to taunt him. She recalled the obscure reference Malcolm had made to her selling herself to Chuck to get the three million and her cheeks turned bright red when she realized Jack must have told him about the deal they had once made for the Empire. It infuriated her and she marched over to Jack, feeling far more angry than upset at the moment. The only thing she couldn't figure out was why he had orchestrated the whole blackmail situation and she was determined to get an answer out of him.

"Here's what I can't figure out" she said. "Why not just run to Chuck the moment you learned the truth and use it as your new fun torture device? Why create this whole charade to have _me_ running around in circles?"

"Paranoid, are we?" Jack smirked. "This may come as a shocker to you but not everything I do is designed to hurt Chuck. In this case I got a lot of enjoyment out of knowing you were on the verge of a nervous breakdown."

"Why?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Jack asked, his smirk now gone. "You bore a Bass child and you kept it a secret. I may put my nephew through the ringer every once in a while but I don't condone outsiders messing with the family."

"Let's get one thing straight" Blair said, pointing a finger at him. "You are not my son's family. You never have been, you never will be, and if you ever set foot in the same _area__code_ as my child it is likely to be the last thing you ever do."

"Publically threatening me might not be the smartest thing to add to your growing list of offenses" Jack said. "That boy is a Bass. He has our blood and that makes him far too good to be raised in the French outback by the likes of you."

"You could care less about the Bass name or the Bass legacy" Blair said icily. "All you're after is to torture Chuck. You are seriously disturbed to want to cause that much damage to your own nephew, somebody you're supposed to love."

"Well if I'm the kettle you're the pot. You've done an awful lot of hurtful things to my dear nephew even though you claim to love him. And let's not even discuss the things you've done to your son."

"Your nephew can give as good as he gets" Blair said. "You stay away. Away from me, away from my son and away from Chuck."

"I think Chuck would rather spend time with me now than with you" Jack said, smirk back on his face. "In fact I'm on my way to pay him a little visit right now. Let's see how many praising things he has to say about you."

He grinned at her and walked off. Blair scowled and wished she could do him bodily harm. She needed an outlet for her emotional turmoil and she knew exactly who to take it out on.

* * *

><p>Chuck was back by his desk, bracing himself against it while he tried to think. Nothing he had learned in the past twenty-four hours made any coherent sense to him. He couldn't believe Blair had lied about such a thing; he didn't <em>want<em> to believe it. If only she had denied it. He knew that line of thinking made no sense but he couldn't help himself. He would almost rather not have a child than to have the given circumstances be true. But it was true and he did have a child, one he knew next to nothing about and who probably knew nothing about him.

He tried to wrap his mind around it and to picture what the child must look like but he couldn't. Did his son even know who his father was? What had Blair told the boy? Did he think his father had walked away from him? The thought of that made Chuck sick. Did he think his father was dead? If that were the case then Blair was unbelievably cruel given Chuck's history with his mother. What lies had Blair told the child to justify the absence of one of his parents? There was no way she had told him the truth.

Alice buzzed him but he ignored her. He didn't want to talk to her or to anyone else. He wasn't going to get any work done today anyway so he might as well go home. The only reason he had left home to begin with was to face Blair in a more neutral environment. He didn't want to have the conversation they had just had someplace where he would live.

He heard the door open behind him and he made up his mind to fire Alice on the spot. Whatever she wanted, it could wait.

"Alice not know" he growled.

"You're never going to succeed long-term in the business world if you're not more inviting" Jack's voice replied.

Chuck turned around to face him, wondering if his day could possibly get any worse. All that was missing at this point was an earthquake, bankruptcy and the bar at home having been emptied when he got home.

"What do you want?" he asked his uncle tiredly.

Jack held up the envelope he had had the other day and grinned.

"Tyra mail!"

"Don't bother Jack" Chuck sighed. "I can figure it out. You're here because you want to make sure I know the _whole_ story. Put your mind at ease. I know I'm the father of Blair's son. What more could you possibly have to lay on me?"

"Believe it or not I'm not here to inflict more harm."

"I certainly believe there's no more possible harm you _could_ inflict" Chuck said in a resigned tone, leaning back against his desk and crossing his arms over his chest. "You know, you fight like a dairy farmer."

"Huh?"

"Whatever's in that envelope I don't care" Chuck said. "Put it wherever and mosey on back to whatever rock you crawled out from under this time."

"I'm not here to mess with you further" Jack said. "I mean it." He took a few steps closer and held up the envelope. "When I first learned about Blair's little secret I wasn't sure what to believe. So I paid a guy to steal the kid's spoon when Blair took him to a diner. Then I ran a paternity test and the results are in the envelope."

"Do I want to know how you got a sample of _my_ DNA?"

"Probably not" Jack said, a hint of a smile reappearing on his face. "There's something else in the envelope as well."

"Cyanide pills?"

"A memory stick. You really ought to tell Blair to get better security on her computer; it was ridiculously easy to hack into. That is, if you ever do speak to her again."

"What do I care what's on her computer?" Chuck asked with a complete lack of enthusiasm.

"I thought you might like to see what your son looks like" Jack said. "Not just at the moment but at various ages. Congratulations Nephew, you now have access to all of Blair's pictures of that child."

"Why?"

Jack looked surprised.

"Why?" he echoed.

"Why get me those pictures? So I can get a better grasp of exactly what I've missed out on these past three and a half years?"

"You and I weren't always at war with one another" Jack pointed out. "In fact while Bart was alive we got along pretty good. You're my blood and while I may enjoy knocking you down I don't enjoy letting an outsider get a good punch in. I thought you and Blair were doomed for sure because of all the crap _you__'__ve_ done but she's proven to be your match. What she did is not okay even by my standards and that ought to say a lot."

"Still doesn't explain why you give a crap about any of this."

"I think a father should have the right to know his son" Jack said in a tone more serious than Chuck had heard him use in a long time. "Even if you can't raise him you should still get to at least know him."

Chuck frowned. There was clearly some subtext here but he couldn't bother to decipher it. Whatever issues Jack had he probably deserved to have them. He walked over to his uncle and snatched the envelope from him.

"I'll give it some thought" he said, walking back to his desk and tossing the envelope on top of a bunch of documents he really ought to be reading.

"That paternity test wasn't really needed" Jack said, heading for the door. "I would have known whose kid that was if I ran into him on the streets."

He left without further comment and Chuck walked around his desk, sinking down in his chair with a heavy sigh.

* * *

><p>"Thanks for agreeing to see me, man" Dan said, sitting down on the couch at the loft. "I'm not entirely sure <em>why<em> you're upset with me but I appreciate you stopping by anyway."

"Yeah," Nate said, slumping down in an armchair, "well I realized you're not exactly at fault here…"

"What exactly _is_ going on?" Dan asked. "You seemed to get really pissed off in a matter of seconds last night."

"Its…" Nate hesitated. "It's… It's Serena."

"What about Serena?"

"I still have… feelings for her."

"Wow."

"Yeah. I've been telling myself it's ludicrous and that she never felt about me the way I felt about her but recently it's seemed like her feelings have changed."

"Okay, then, so… what's the problem?"

"If you haven't noticed she gets really upset whenever you show too much interest in Blair" Nate said.

"Oh…"

Dan pondered this for a moment. He wasn't sure what to tell Nate. He wasn't interested in Serena himself anymore; she would always be his first love and part of him always would love her but he had given up on the two of them making it work a long time ago. He wasn't about to reactivate the triangle they had had going on for a few months back in college. But if Serena still had feelings for him then he would still be an obstacle for Nate.

"Look, I…" he began. "I don't know what Serena feels. If she feels anything for me at all anymore. What you need to do is talk to her. You know, give her a chance to tell you how _she_ feels. Even if she does still have feelings for me that isn't necessarily a hindrance. I think part of you will always love your first love."

"I've lost her to you before" Nate pointed out. "I'm not so sure I could be happy with her knowing that she still feels something for you. If there's some part of her that will always love you… whoever ends up with her will have to live with that. Just like whoever Blair ends up with will have to live with the knowledge that she'll always have feelings for Chuck and like Emmy has to accept that there's a part of Chuck that will always belong to Blair."

Dan groaned at the mentioning of Chuck and Blair. Why was it that these two were always brought up as the ultimate romance? He couldn't find anything even remotely engaging about their past relationship and everything that had come with it. People seemed to just ascribe whatever attributes they thought the perfect love should have onto Chuck and Blair without paying attention to whether or not it fit.

"I don't think Chuck's love for Blair is all that immortal" he couldn't help saying. "Nor is hers for him. They're just each other's bad habit."

"What makes you say that?" Nate scoffed.

Dan wasn't sure how to answer. He was feeling increasingly more guilty over telling Chuck the truth last night, ashamed of himself for having stooped to that level to get Chuck back out of Blair's love life, hopefully for good this time. He couldn't explain any of this to Nate though. It would only cause further damage if he blabbered about Blair's secret to even more people.

Before he could decide what to say the door flew open and Blair came storming in, looking like she had been possessed. Nate and Dan both flew to their feet, Nate terrified that something had gone wrong and Blair's secret had been published after all, Dan realizing she had spoken to Chuck and was out for blood.

"Daniel!" Blair practically screamed, striding up to him with eyes that could kill. "You puny, hypocritical, muppet-haired, poorly dressed, harlequin romance writing, sanctimonious _ass_!"

"Whoa, Blair, slow down" Nate said.

"How could you do this?" Blair cried, ignoring Nate's existence. "I trusted you! And you _sabotaged_ me!"

"Okay Blair, hold on-" Dan tried to placate her.

"Don't touch me!" Blair snarled and took half a step back. Tears started to flow down her cheeks. "You ruined _everything_!"

"Blair, what has happened?" Nate asked, getting seriously worried.

"He hates me now" Blair said and sobbed. "Are you happy now? Did you get what you wanted? Or were you just out to clear your precious conscience?"

"Can we, can we talk about this without yelling and screaming?" Dan said, starting to fear her wrath.

"No we are _done_ talking!" Blair cried. "I'm not confiding anything in you ever again!"

"I know Chuck is probably very angry right now" Dan said. "But does he really have a right to be? What about all the things he did to you? And if he loves you like you believe he does this won't matter in the end."

"It's not even _about_ Chuck and me anymore, don't you realize that?" Blair cried and smacked him on the arm. "He's going to try and take my _son_!"

"Whoa, hold on, slow down a minute!" Nate said, waving his arms in a time-out gesture. "Your, your _what_? Blair you have a _what __now_?"

"My son, okay?" Blair said, turning to him for the first time since she walked through the door. "My son with Chuck."

"Chuck never told me he had a kid" Nate said, dumbfounded.

"_I_ never told _him_. I was going to but World's Conscience over there beat me to it" she said, turning her wrath back to Dan.

"Blair I don't know what you mean" Dan said. "Chuck said he was going to take your son away? Believe me I never wanted for _that_ to happen."

"He didn't" Blair said. "But he's Chuck friggin' Bass! Do you really think he's just going to let this slide? The one thing he's wanted since forever and I kept it from him. He's not going to just shrug his shoulders and let us continue on with our lives. He'll want to get to know his son and he'll want him to be raised in Manhattan and he'll want to have custody of him. He'll hire the best lawyers, bribe whoever he has to bribe, use all the influence that he's got. What does it matter that I've been the boy's sole parent for over three years? I did a horrible thing in keeping him a secret from his father and that's coming back to haunt me now and it's even worse because of _you_!"

"Blair I still don't follow" Dan stuttered. "Either he'd do this regardless of how he found out or he won't do it at all."

"He thinks of me as the enemy now" Blair said. "The one who kept his baby from him. Do you think he's going to let that go? The truth can have a very different impact depending on how you learn it. If _I_ had told him-"

"Why the hell _haven__'__t_ you told him?" Nate interrupted her. "Good God Blair, I don't believe this!"

"Stay out of it Archibald!" Blair snarled.

"Like hell I'm going to stay out of it" Nate scoffed. "You had Chuck's baby and never told him about it? But you told _Dan_?" He turned to Dan. "You, you knew about this all along and you said _nothing_? Whatever happened to your moral compass? Whatever happened to doing the right thing regardless of how you may feel about someone?"

"I seem to have lost my way" Dan griped.

"That's an understatement" Nate said. "I'm out of here. The pair of you can sort this out as best you can. I'm going to go see how Chuck is holding up."

He walked out and Dan looked at Blair again and was scared by the passionate fury in her eyes.

"Why?" she asked in a sob. "_Why_ Dan? What the hell reason did you have to suddenly tell him everything?"

"I…" Dan said, knowing he didn't have an justifiable reason. "I guess I just… crossed one of the last lines I ever expected myself to cross."

"That's not a _reason. _That's barely an explanation! You know I've been scared of telling Chuck the truth and you know the reasons why. Why did you sell me out? You tell me you _love_ me in the morning and you go ahead and ruin my life in the evening. That's a pretty impressive 180 even for you."

"I made a mistake" Dan said. "Do I regret it? Yeah, partially. At the same time I think it's all for the best that Chuck now knows."

"Sure you do" Blair snorted. "You're all high and mighty and self-righteous when it benefits you to be. You think you did me some sort of _favor_? I guess in a way you did because now I know once and for all that you are a horrible person and the last person on earth I'd like to call my friend."

"Hey, compared to the stuff your other so called friends have done to you over the years, not to mention some of the things you've done to them, I think your reaction is a little extreme" Dan said, getting really nervous.

"Nate and Chuck and Serena might have betrayed me in the past and I might have betrayed them" Blair said. "But never without a reason. What reason could you possibly have? You were the one who insisted that Chuck should never know. You said so just _yesterday_. And now here I am, the love of my life hates me and my son's life is about to become complete chaos and… and I might end up losing him."

"Look I may loathe Chuck but I don't think he would take Sebastian from you" Dan said. "He's not that cruel. And I don't believe you really think that either, you're just... in shock right now."

"He can be ruthless when he wants something" Blair sobbed. "He can be even more ruthless when he hates someone. Not to mention the lengths he would be willing to go to for someone he loves. He wants his son. He hates me. And he loves Sebastian."

"He doesn't _know_ Sebastian" Dan pointed out mildly.

"He's always loved Sebastian" Blair argued. "Long before he was even conceived. Chuck has wanted a family of his own since forever. He will stop at nothing to make sure he gets to raise Sebastian. Thanks to you I no longer have any chance of persuading him, to, to make him see that we should all be together as a _family_. You're lucky I have to focus everything I've got on protecting and keeping my son right now or I would annihilate you. This so called friendship is over. For good."

She turned on her heel and hurried out, wiping away her tears even though it was no use as new ones just kept falling. When the door slammed behind her Dan stood there for several minutes wondering when he had betrayed his own ideals and ended up being the kind of person who would do what he had done over the past few years. Keeping a child from his father and now betraying the woman he loved in the vain hope that by making his biggest competitor eliminate himself from the race he might actually stand a chance. He ought to have known all along that it wouldn't work. He had never felt worse about himself.

He slumped down on the couch, trying to justify his actions since it was a little too overwhelming to look at all his mistakes and face the music. He had told Chuck because the truth needed to come out, because the deception he had been so fervently advocating had been wrong and he had known it all along. At the same time he had kept the truth from Chuck because he was looking out for the good of the child.

Though no matter what spin he put on things in his mind he couldn't fool himself anymore. He had made one bad decision after another, abandoned one moral principal after the other, all for a woman who might never love him back the way he loved her. He had played the game the same way Chuck would have, only unlike Chuck he had a conscience. Sinking to his rival's level had not brought him anything good. So what now? Should he try to make up for his mistakes? Perhaps if he atoned for his sins he might be able to look at himself in the mirror. And perhaps Blair might eventually forgive him and maybe even love him back.

* * *

><p>Chuck sat on the couch of yet another impersonal hotel room, Jack's envelope and a laptop on the coffee table in front of him. He wasn't sure what to do next or even what to feel right now. He didn't want to talk to anybody or see anyone he knew which was why he had gone to the Empire and gotten a room just so he could sit in silence and think with absolutely no disturbances. He had stopped by the apartment and left his phone there so nobody could use it to track him.<p>

His eyes kept drifting over to the envelope. He didn't want to open it and he was afraid not to open it. The thought of plugging that memory stick into the computer and seeing the pictures of his son frightened him. What if he felt nothing? What if he felt instant love? Either option came with a ton of difficult emotions he wasn't ready to deal with just yet. What was it like to look at a picture of someone and know that that person was your child? Most parents didn't see their child for the first time via photo. He didn't want the first time he laid eyes on his son to be in such an impersonal matter yet he didn't think he could wait for days or weeks or months before he knew what the boy looked like. What would it be like to look at a little boy and see both himself and Blair? Finding out should have been a dream come true but the circumstances made it anything but.

He took a deep breath and reached out his hand to grab the envelope. He spent another couple of minutes holding it in his hand before opening it. He ignored the DNA test and went straight for the memory stick, fishing it out between his thumb and his index finger as if it was something potentially damaging just by touch. He then spent another few minutes feeling it with his fingers, playing with it a little, familiarizing himself with it. Then he growled at his own foolishness and quickly plugged it in.

Jack had apparently done a thorough job. There were several folders on the memory stick and not all of them had pictures. He had gathered all sorts of information about the child but Chuck wasn't interested in any of it. He would be damned if he acted like his own father and got to know his son through other sources. He had already decided that aside from looking at the pictures he wouldn't find anything out about his son through any other way than asking him or spending time with him. He wanted to get to know his son, not get to know about him. He decided to click on the folder labeled "Of special interest" and wondered if it was Blair or Jack who had named it such.

He rested his chin in the palm of his hand and slowly let out a trembling sigh as he clicked on a picture at random. It showed a blonde haired boy squinting in the sun and grinning widely, clinging to a large St Bernard dog. He stared at the picture for several minutes trying to wrap his mind around what he was seeing but it all seemed to bizarre to be real. He clicked on another picture and when the image opened he felt a chill run down his spine. The photograph showed Harold lying on his back on a rug, holding an infant up in the air above him. It was eerily similar to a photograph from Chuck's own childhood, one of himself and his uncle. Chuck had almost forgotten that there had been a time when he was very fond of his uncle and when Jack had seemed to be fond of him too. It had to be Jack who had selected this picture as being "Of special interest" but he couldn't figure out why. Whatever the reason it was creepy to look at the picture of his son with his grandfather and be reminded of the picture of himself and his uncle. He slammed the laptop shut and decided not to look at any other pictures. He wanted to see the child in person, not on picture.

His mind seemed to be going a mile a minute. There seemed to be a hundred different aspects to take into consideration both regarding his own feelings, hopes and desires and those of Blair, their son and Emmy. She would be affected by this too regardless of their relationship status. It was impossible to find a solution that would make everyone happy. He couldn't even think of something that wouldn't make one or more of them miserable. He felt a deep, burning fury towards Blair for being the reason behind all of this but he knew he couldn't focus on that right now. If he did he would get buried in his anger and resentment. It wouldn't change anything and it might make their son collateral damage.

He stayed that way the rest of the day and the night that followed, trying to make sense of everything and figure out what to do next. He was barely aware that he hadn't eaten since the previous day and he could care less that nobody knew where he was and that someone might worry about him. He wasn't even particularly concerned that Blair might try to leave the country as soon as possible and take the child on a let's-avoid-your-father holiday. He had let her go live her life the last time she had left New York but this time around he would send out every PI he could find to track her down if she tried anything funny. He would find her wherever she tried to hide.

The next morning, after having gotten only three hours of sleep in total and no food in his system, he left the hotel room and headed for his office. He ignored Alice's questions and concerns when he arrived but absentmindedly ate the breakfast she conjured up for him. He sat down at his desk and took a deep breath, lifting his landline phone to call his lawyer. He knew what his next step would be and he was determined to not waste any time.

* * *

><p>It was past lunch when Blair arrived at his office, so nervous she was nearly trembling and weary after spending a sleepless night reproaching herself for every mistake she had made, grieving the knowledge that Chuck would never want her now and worrying that her son would end up caught in a bitter custody feud. She was glad Chuck wanted to talk to her even though she feared what he had to say. She had spent four years running from her problems and hiding from them. She couldn't do it any longer and it was time to face the consequences.<p>

Her heart ached when she walked inside his office and laid eyes on him. He looked like hell. He was wearing the same clothes as the day before, his hair had not even been combed, much less styled, and he had dark circles under his eyes. Clearly he hadn't gotten any sleep either. And when he looked up at her there was so much hurt and sadness in his eyes. She had seen him devastated before but never anything like this.

"I'm so glad you called" she opened with, nervously twisting her hands. "Or, had your secretary call. We need to talk."

"Have a seat" he said in an emotionless tone.

Obediently she sat down in one of the comfortable black chairs opposite his desk. Every second felt like an eternity and she was torn between hoping he would let her tell her side of the story and wishing he would just go ahead and tell her what he planned to do next. Slowly he walked around to the other side of the desk and placed his hands on it. He closed his eyes hard for a second and then opened them, careful to look anywhere but at her.

"I don't want an explanation from you" he said bitterly. He left his spot by the desk, walking over to look out the windows instead. "Nothing you can say is going to make this any better or even any less horrid. You kept my child a secret. There is no justifying that. I may have made my mistakes but I'm not a child molester or someone who in any other way poses a threat to a kid. There's no way you can say you did it for the sake of the child. But I don't want to talk about that and I don't want to talk about you and me."

"You _should_ let me explain" Blair said, convinced that even if he wouldn't like her any better after hearing the whole story at least he might not blame himself for any of it.

"The only thing we have left to talk about is our… our son" he continued, ignoring her comment. "Does he even know who I am?"

"He knows he has a father" Blair said nervously, feeling a little bit like she was being quizzed by a professor and that her answers would make or break her grade. "I've shown him a picture of you."

"Does he know why I haven't been around?"

"We… We haven't talked about it."

"Is he a good boy?"

The question was spoken in a whisper, so low that Blair barely heard it. She felt close to crying and wished she could ease his pain somehow, any way possible so long as it didn't include turning Sebastian's life upside down.

"He's the best" she answered. "He doesn't always behave, but… Chuck he's so much like us both. He's like what I expect we were at that age."

Slowly Chuck walked across the room and stopped near the door, shoving his hands in his pockets. Blair turned to follow him with her eyes and then rose from her chair, tentatively taking a step closer.

"Chuck, I…"

"You really played me for a fool" he said.

"What?"

"If I weren't the target I'd almost admire you for it. You had me ignoring my work and ignoring my girlfriend to run around and help you prevent me finding out about my child. It's brilliant. And completely soulless."

"Chuck how can you think that of me?" Blair said. "Keeping Sebastian a secret was a mistake but I would never use you in such a cruel fashion. I wanted to tell you this whole time but there was never a good time."

"Never? Not even yesterday when we spoke about your son in this very office?"

"I was so shocked, I was…"

She trailed off, not knowing what to say. They were both silent for a minute, Chuck fighting the anger that was building up inside of him and Blair trying desperately to find the right words to say.

"I suppose you want to know what I plan on doing next" he said grimly.

She swallowed and nodded, then shakily answered him in a whispered 'yes'.

"I don't have to take any guesses as to what _you_ want" he said bitterly. "If you wanted me to be any part of my son's life you would have told me the truth a long time ago."

"You've got it all wrong" Blair said.

He spun around and looked her in the eye for the first time since they had begun to speak. The look in his eyes now was venomous and bitter and it made her want to recoil.

"Do you really think you can bat your eyes and quiver your lips and have me yield?" he hissed. He strode past her and stopped by his desk, his hands resting on his waist. "If you think you can decrease my anger then spare your breath. Now you're going to be quiet and listen to what I have to say."

"I don't blame you for being angry" she said meekly, her heart pounding with fear that he was going to go all out and get back at her by taking her son away from her completely. She had to find some way of placating him a bit but she couldn't think of anything to say that wouldn't make it worse. "Maybe we don't need to make any decisions about this today. Let it all sink in first, think about it rationally."

"I don't need more time to think. I want to fight you on this. I want to rally every attorney on this entire continent to make sure you don't get to keep calling all the shots. _And __I __want __my __son_!" He took a few breaths, calming himself. "But what's the use? You're never going to give me what I want. We both know your talk about planning on telling me the truth is just talk. You're not going to let me have him, not nearly to the extent I want to be part of his life. In the end we would just end up fighting bitter court battles against each other. It would catch the media's attention and the boy will be put through exactly the kind of media circus you were fighting so hard to avoid."

He paused for a while and Blair tried desperately to decipher what he had just said and whether it was good or bad for her. He turned and sat down on his desk, running his hand over his chin. When he continued he seemed to have calmed himself a little.

"You have no idea how much I want that kid" he said. "My son, my own flesh and blood… But at least one of us has to think of him firsthand and sacrifice what's best for us in order to preserve what is best for him."

"_I_ want what's best for him" Blair objected.

"Don't try to pull that song and dance with me" he scoffed. "Although you probably will be singing and dancing when you leave here, and all the way back to your precious French hideaway."

"Could you please speak plain English?" Blair snarled, tired of the emotional rollercoaster and wanting straight answers.

"He's over three years old and he has no idea who I am" Chuck said. "His home is in France and his family is… well I don't know who his family is but I know that in his eyes I'm not part of it. And you will never let him go. You will never give in and let me be a real part of raising my boy."

"That is-"

"Just shut up, will you?" Chuck sighed and held up a hand as a signal for her to stop. "I will hate myself for this for the rest of my life but I have to think about what's best for that little boy. A long, drawn-out court case would be the worst thing we could do to him. So you win."

Blair blinked a few times, unable to make sense of what he had just said.

"W… what?" she stuttered.

"You win" Chuck said in a completely resigned voice. "I spoke with my lawyer and… I decided I can't. I can't go through with a custody battle. Congratulations Waldorf, you got the outcome you most desired. You can go ahead and return to France and to our son and forget he even has a father. Because his father won't come looking."

"Chuck that… that doesn't make any sense" Blair objected. "And it's not what I want. I want you to know him and I want him to know you."

"Please don't insult me with such obvious lies."

"I'm not lying!" Blair said emphatically. "What I wanted was never for the two of you to be apart for all time. I don't want a bitter custody battle any more than you do but we don't need to go to the other extreme."

"We do" Chuck said, looking down at the floor. "I can't handle the middle-ground. That child matters to me and I've never even met him. If I do meet him… The point is, the only way I can keep myself from fighting you till the end over who gets to raise him is if I don't get to know him. I'll never be able to pretend he doesn't exist and I need you to promise me that you will make sure he knows I want him and I didn't abandon him. He shouldn't have to grow up with the abandonment issues I had."

"Give it a few days Chuck" Blair said. "You'll feel different. We can work something out. Something that works for all of us. We've always been able to talk about things."

"I thought so too" Chuck said and got up from where he was sitting. "That was before I found out you haven't talked to me about the only thing that truly matters."

"I don't want you to give up" Blair said. She had been terrified of losing her son but this was not what she had hoped would happen instead. "I have made so many mistakes; let's not continue to make more."

"I have said my peace" Chuck said, calm now. He got up on his feet again and placed his hands on his sides. "Please just go."

"No" Blair said. "This is not okay."

He laughed a little, a joyless, bitter laugh.

"This is _not_ the only alternative" she repeated.

"Look …" Chuck said. "There is no version where it's a win for everyone. There's definitely not a version where our son doesn't suffer and that's all thanks to you. I'm just opting for the lesser of the evils from his point of view." He paused for a minute. "If you ever need anything for him… Money, or... a kidney… Whatever. Anything. Come find me."

Blair wanted to tell him that she needed a father for Sebastian but she couldn't bring herself to say it. Not because she didn't mean it but because she knew he wouldn't hear her out, only throw it back in her face. This was the last outcome she had wanted. If they couldn't live together as a family she at least wanted the three of them to live in the same city and for Sebastian to see both his parents as much as possible. She was more than willing to move to New York to make this happen and she would tell Chuck this. But not right now. Right now he was still in shock and still angry and still discovering the true depths of her betrayal. She knew that right now he meant what he had said. She also knew he would look at the situation differently in a couple of days, possibly a couple of weeks. She needed to give him that time.

"I love you" she said softly.

He sniggered. She didn't blame him for not believing her right now. Without saying anything else she walked out of his office.

* * *

><p>So that's that! You can probably guess what the sequel story will be about. I'm aiming to post it later today and it will be called "Father and Son" (sticking to a song theme here =))<p>

Let me know what you thought of this chapter! Thanks for reading.


End file.
